Dr. Lillian Glass’ Communication and Handshaking Advice to Trump To Make Friends and Influence People

screen-shot-2016-11-13-at-6-26-44-pmThere is no question that  Presidential Candidate Donald Trump, did it “his way” and won the election.  But now that he is the President, as a 30 year veteran communication expert,  I would like to offer him some very useful advice. I  recommend that he tone down “his way” in terms of how he communicates publically. The bragging, self aggrandizement, constant self reference, lack of humility, using over inflated terms terms like “never in the history as anyone…” as it pertains to his achievements  needs to stop immediately.

 It is starting not to  work with friends and supporters and it is definitely not working with foes. It is merely adding fuel to their fire.

The universal rule of communication is  humility.  No one responds well to a braggart. No one likes to hear someone tell how great they are even if they invested a cure for cancer and solved the national debt. First and foremost, he must STOP constantly talking about himself and bragging on himself and saying how great he is. He needs others to say that about him. He does not need to say it about himself.

While  it may have worked with the late  boxer  Muhammed Ali, it was often tongue and cheek and said with humour.  It even worked for Trump when he was a celebrity and entertainer. But as a President,  it looks awful when Trump says it about himself. As a world leader, it  smacks of arrogance, self absorption,  and insecurity. It is  just plain bad form.

No matter where you live in the world, there is no doubt you were raised hearing the saying “don’t get big headed” or “don’t get too big for your britches,” don’t brag about yourself” or  “Stop showing off .” Most cultures appreciate graciousness and humility, especially when it comes to one’s own achievements. 

Yes,  self confidence is wonderful and it is essential to have a healthy dose of self esteem and confidence  for what you have done, what you are currently doing, and what you plan to do. But Keep it to yourself  or only share it with your intimates and very close circle of friends and family. Let people know your achievements but do it humbly.

No one likes a continuous braggart or someone who exaggerates for effect, or  who is big headed. It alienates  most people and it is off- putting. That is how many physicians who tend to be too full of themselves often end up in trouble with patients and in legal disputes.

Now that he is the President, he needs to keep it less personal and strictly focus on and discuss the issues just as passionately as he talks about himself.  He needs to speak less about himself and more about us and how the issues affect us.

TRUMP”S PRESSER CALLING OUT FAKE NEWS 

 Donald Trump’s recent presser focused on setting the record straight and  admonishing the “fake news” and  many less than professional journalists. In my view his speech was correct and what he said finally  needed to be said. Had I not personally  experienced  what he is talking about – the spin and negativity, I would have never believed what Trump was saying. But he is absolutely correct in this regard. 

MISINTERPRETED TRUMP/ ABE HANDSHAKE AND FACIAL GESTURE 

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I have been doing countless interviews about the Trump/ Abe handshake all over the world and have been setting the record straight that there was no problem between Trump and Japanese Prime Minister Abe. In fact their body language each showed that they really liked one another.  This was indicated by their body language. Trump did the double handshake which shows genuine affection and Abe leaned into Trump and his toes pointed in Trump’s direction, indicating he really liked Trump. He also showed a genuine smile with his apples of his cheeks raised, eyes squinted, and teeth showing. 

No one overpowered anyone. As they were equally formidable in their approach. In fact Abe directed the photo op as she told Trump “look at me” which Trump immediately did. They maintained. eye to eye contact as they both  had a strong handshake. In fact Trump remarked that Abe had a strong handshake.  

When the photo op was finally over and they both broke their strong handshake, Ave looked up ( as though he was searching for someone) and immediately an aide ( in glasses) came over to him. He did NOT roll his eyes at Trump. Japanese people do not do that when they are exasperated or when they are not happy about someone. So the take that journalists had on this was wrong. Many called me to verify that the relationship between Trump and Abe was bad. i told them that is was not and set the record straight. Most journalists were great and reported my take and saw my point of view.

But there were others who simply would have none of it.I found that distressing. When the election was taking place Quartz, a new publication which is an offshoot of the Atlantic Monthly paid me to write a story on Trump and Pence’s handshake and body language which I gladly did.

Several days ago, I got an urgent email from one of Quartz’s writers Selian Cheng who wanted to know my take on the Trump. Abe handshake.  The article involved no pay as it was just my opinion. I got back to her immediately with the view I described above. Then  never heard back from her. Finally,  she emailed me to let me now she found someone else and wanted to use other body language expert to get their different view.

I then emailed her back and asked why she even bothered to contact me in the first place if that was her aim all along  as it wasted her time and mine. After reading the article in Quartz which she wrote, it appeared to me in my view  that my quote didn’t apparently match her spin of the story which was very anti-Trump and mischaracterized the whole handshake situation,. So she simply got another body language “expert” ( and I use that term loosely)  who’s views may have  matched her agenda in my view. It saddened me as that is not how I learned to do journalism as a journalism student at the best journalism school in the country, USC.  

I felt bad about this so I wanted to share my thoughts with the Editor in Chief of Quartz. Unfortunately I didn’t get the chance because his Editorial Assistant Molly Rubin, with whom I shared why I was calling, in  what I perceived as a nasty tone, said “thank you very much” and hung up on me. So there you have it!  Obviously she didn’t want to hear what I had to say on the matter and with the Toxic behavior she showed me, I doubt anyone got my message or concern.

FUTURE BODY LANGUAGE  ADVICE CONCERNING  HANDSHAKING 

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Donald Trump is a man who is very demonstrative and effusive in terms of his affection. He even kissed Pence when Pence was  nominated as Vice President.

 Many are not used to it, so they are taken aback and they are making a huge deal out of his  kissing, handshakes and effusive greetings.

 But I can assure you the way he meets and greets is part of the norm in Hollywood and Trump is very Hollywood when it comes to his greetings. People tend to be more   open, affectionate and effusive in show business than they are in other businesses. So we tend to be used to this.

Personally, I find it refreshing. If you really like someone , you let it be known. That is what Trump did with Abe, Pence, Trudeau and others he likes. With Trudeau, they not only shook hands, they both embraced shoulders which is an even bigger display of mutual affection. It is NOT by any means a power play when it is mutual. It showed they were on equal footing in terms of their affection towards one another. 

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Trump doesn’t hide his positive emotions and I say he should continue to do what he is going in terms of being genuine  in his meet and greets, which have received world- wide attention.

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Apparently many world leaders who are planning to meet President Trump in the future are concerned with how to approach the newly elected President when they meet him. “How can the leader best shake his hand”  was the question a Chinese journalist  from China’s major newspaper asked me in regard to Chinese President Xi’s upcoming visit to the United States.

 I let her know that the best way to approach Trump in terms of his hand-shaking is to mirror him. If he does the double handshake with his hand on top of Xi’s, then Xi, also needs to do the same . This will indicate mutual warmth and affection and will not be read as Trump taking charge or overpowering. I also suggested that Xi match Trump’s strength and firmness in terms of his handshake.

 I also suggested that Xi not bold back and be genuine in his feelings, because Trump certainly will hold nothing back.  I assured the Chinese journalist  during our interview that the body doesn’t lie no matter how hard you may try to control it. The truth always leaks out. 

 

 

 

Trump Handshake Did Not Overpower Abe But Showed Positive Affection as They Both Like One Another

screen-shot-2017-02-11-at-1-10-14-amI got so many calls and emails  today from TOXIC journalists who were determined to spin an innocent story about President Trump’s meeting with Japan’s Prime Minister into a negative international incident when it was not. I refused to play their game and stuck to my guns about how it was not an issue. In fact one journalist from a  publication who always interviews me didn’t like my honest answer. So they found another body language expert to spin it her negative way. I was disgusted at her and I told her so in no uncertain terms.

As a bona fide trained journalist myself,  I HATE this and I have no respect for this journalist or the publication who hired her or the other journalists who called me with their own agendas in mind.

The controversy is over the following expression of Abe. The  so called “journalists” claimed he rolled his eyes after the handshake indicating he didn’t like Trump. This is NONSENSE.

Screen Shot 2017-02-11 at 1.10.34 AM.pngFirst of all in Japanese body language the eye roll is not used to show disgust or displeasure. Secondly EVERYTHING has to be measured and analyzed in terms of CONTEXT! All Abe was doing was looking at someone.

Abe had a long handshake with Trump and was even directing the photo  op as he told Trump to look at him.

Screen Shot 2017-02-11 at 1.10.42 AM.pngHe was ready to get out of his chair as you see here. Trump’s thumbs up shows they had a great interaction. And one thing about Trump that is for certain, he knows how to read people and he read their interaction accurately.

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Now here is the person  to whom Abe was reacting. There was no eye roll as the journalists said. They also tried to spin it that Abe was overpowered by Trump.

This is NOT so . Look at Abe’s very  masculine sitting position with legs apart.  Look at how much room he is taking up. This is not how a person who feels overpowered looks. So the journalists were wrong again.

Screen Shot 2017-02-11 at 1.10.14 AM.pngHere is when the two leaders are having eye to eye contact and smiling which is a great sign. Abe shows his teeth and the apples of his cheeks are raised which indicates it is a genuine smile. The screenshot is taken just after Abe tells Trump to look at him for the photo op. So Abe is just as media savvy as Trump on the world stage.

Screen Shot 2017-02-11 at 1.10.06 AM.pngIn fact,  here is  when Abe tells Trump to look at him. Trump is happy and it is a genuine smile with teeth showing and balls of cheeks raised and eyes crinkled.

We rarely see Trump like this so when we do, it is clearly genuine. Trump also does not have an overpowering grip on Abe as Abe is gripping right back. They BOTH have strong handshakes as you can see.

In fact after the photo opp Trump looked at Abe and said “strong handshake”. So there was a language of mutual strength being spoken to one another thru their handshake and touch.

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Their body language mirrors one another which is a great sign in terms of their relationship. Note how both of their hands drop down. Also both of their toes are pointed towards one another which is further indication that they like one another.

Trump also put his hand over Abe’s which is an affectionate gesture. Abe likes this a as he returns a genuine smile with teeth showing.

So to all you TOXIC journalists who wanted to spin this  story your negative and ignorant  way, I say SHAME ON YOU!!! and I also say I WILL NOT PAY YOUR TOXIC GAME”. I want NO part of it !

I am not going to say negative things about Trump when I see nothing negative body language wise and communication wise. And I say SHAME to any body language person who does play your game just to get their name in print. Nothing is worth compromising your integrity for some PR.

 

 

Not Being Political Keeps Dr. Lillian Glass Objective When It Comes to Body Language Analysis of Politicians

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After doing body language analyses on political candidates for the past three decades, there was nothing more horrible for me as a professional in the area of human behavior with a specialization in body language and communication,  than to do these  analyses during this particular election season. It was  one of the absolute worst experiences I have ever encountered professionally.

The level of venomous bile and vulgar hate, ruined relationships, and even false accusations about me being biased  and “political” and pro this candidate or that candidate was astounding. There was no convincing anyone as they were on a hate tirade and only saw red. 

I’M NO FAN OF POLITICS-ACADEMIC POLITICS  OR ANY OTHER KIND

For those of you who know me well, you know that I absolutely detest politics of any kind.  I first encountered politics when I was a Master’s student at the University of Michigan. I observed how poorly certain professors treated certain students simply because they had an  academic advisor, (who through no fault of their own) who happened to be on the wrong side of the academic political fence  and was not in synch  the rest of the department. Those students were treated more harshly by other professors in order to get back at their disliked academic colleague and fellow professor.

At the U of Minnesota during my PhD,  I experienced it personally.  I saw the pettiness, ugliness, stupidness,  self importance and self aggrandizement  of so called intellectuals and academicians,  that it made me push myself to the limit and hurry up and get out of there and get away from these Toxic People as quickly as possible. As a result, I  finished my PhD in record time and at age  24 I had my doctoral degree.  

I also saw politics rear it’s ugly head as a post-doctoral student, where not only academic politics was rampant but now it was combined with hospital politics, thus making things more severe and brutal. Thankfully, I wasn’t involved in any of these meles. But I witnessed many who were involved and who suffered emotionally and academically in terms of their rankings and promotions. 

Then when I was a  young  very popular professor with my students,  I really saw politics up close and personal when students lined up to take my classes and to put it simply, other professors felt (for lack of a better word)a bit  jealous. I gave all my students high grades .  Apparently,  this a “no no” in academic politics, as you have to give some lower grades to balance out some type of curve,  which I refused to do. I hated all the rules and regulations. So I left academia  for good and went into my own  private practice, where I flourished.

Historically, since so many academicians know how to play politics, it is no surprise that many take their political prowess and knowledge of how to  play the game,  to a higher level and  run for office like Elizabeth Warren and Ben Carson among so many others , presently in the Senate and in the House of Representatives. 

There were NO politics in my own practice. I was in charge with no quotas and not silly rules and regulations. I LOVED ALL of my clients and patients and treated everyone with the same respect and professionalism and warmth, regardless if they  couldn’t afford my fee and were unable to pay.  I was treating these clients for free or whether they were superstars who could  easily pay the full fee . I treated those with craniofacial deformities and genetic disorders (my speciality) exactly as I treated celebrities,  world leaders, or major sports figures. 

                                   EXPERIENCE WITH POLITICS IN THE MEDIA 

As I became successful in my practice and was able to sustain a living from it, I branched out into another love I had since jr. high school- that of journalism. While I was a professor at USC, I was able to take classes for free. So I took journalism classes at the prestigious USC School of Journalism ( where I  was also gave lectures to journalism students). I learned so much there and absolutely loved it. My aim was to now combine my  vast academic, medical, psychology, human behavior ( body language and communication)  knowledge with journalism and become ( if you will a media doctor) just like I am now.  

But getting there wasn’t easy as I quickly learned. One of my professors at USC thought I had what he called “it.”He said I had the physical look, a vibrant personality, and lots of energy and would be great on camera. So he graciously called upon a television agent friend of his  who worked at the William Morris Agency to meet me.

The agent, Sid Graw, who also represented the great television host,  Tom Snyder, agreed with my professor and took me on as a client. As my agent, he quickly set up a meeting for me with an established Hollywood producer, Dave Bell, who was doing something revolutionary at the time- starting a television show on cable TV.  Dave Bell met me and thought I  that with my eclectic  background, I was a perfect fit to be the host of the show. He said not to worry as he would pair me with an experienced co-host. Together the male co-host ( Keith Berwick)  and I  met the sponsor ( Bristol Meyers) and the head of USA Network (Kay Koplovitz )where the show “Alive and Well” would be aired .  All in charge were well aware of the fact that I had no on camera experience per se, but they willing to gave me my first break on TV.  

 TOXIC POLITICAL CO-HOST  FROM HELL-KEITH BERWICK

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While Dave Bell and the production crew were great, the opposite could be said about my  co-host Keith Berwick  ( now at the Aspen Institute),  56 years old at the time,  a lantern- jawed , deep voiced, television veteran who had at one time hosted his own show on PBS.

First, he objected to my being called “Dr. Glass”  and refused to acknowledge it on air. The reason I was hired in the first place was because  of my unique  academic and professional experience  and the fact that I had Dr. in front of my name, which the producers and  the network would thought would give the show even more credibility. But Keith Berwick decided he was having none of it.

Whenever we had to do our “stand ups” together on camera, Keith made me take off my heels as he said he didn’t want me to look taller than him when I stood next to him. So there I stood, barefoot next to Keith Berwick as we introduced the show and various segments.

To make matters worse, as I was doing my interviews with guests on the show, he would stand to the side and give me dirty looks and shake his head in disgust. Needless to say, this didn’t make me feel comfortable. Instead of offering me suggestions as to how I could improve myself,  he would degrade me and tell me how awful I was. (In looking back over the tapes I really wasn’t that bad at all).

It was just that Keith Berwick as trying to make me feel bad. For some reason, this grown man felt intimidated by me- a twenty something year old at the time.  It was to the point that whenever we had lunch with the crew, he refused to sit near me. One day, I got a phone call from one of the executives of the show who told me I was no longer needed on the show. 

My agent, Sid Graw told me that Keith, who brought his PBS credibility and years of on- camera  experience to the table, said he would walk  if I had to be his co-host, he said that instead of me,  he wanted a bevy of beautiful women as co-hosts to surround him, while he would be the central figure of the show ( a la Charlie’s Angels). That was political as it could get. 

While Keith Berwick had initially  quashed my young dreams to be a media doctor, he wasn’t successful at doing so as soon I got another gig- an even better one at KABC television, the local ABC affiliate,  where I was not only a reporter, but I  had my my own psychology and self esteem segment for 5 years.

I learned so much and was mentored by the late and great television icon, Jerry Dunphy            ( whom the Ted Baxter character on the old Mary Tyler Moore Show was based on). Thankfully, Jerry was the complete  opposite of Keith Berwick.  Jerry took me under his wing and let me watch all of his interviews. When we were on set, he taught be pacing and how to speak  rhythmically and to use the teleprompter effectively, how to punch up key words when on the air.   I was there for 5  years until Cap Cites bought ABC. I loved it  there.  We were like a family- The Eyewitness News Family and everyone got along so well. Jim Moret ( Senior Reporter on Inside Edition) Larry Carroll , producer, Sue Vorgan,  so many others . There was no politics and no power trips as we all  adored one another and it showed on air. That is why were the number one station for so long.

My Toxic experience with Keith Berwick, who used his political power  at the time with the show’s executives to get his way,  made me well aware of the politics that exists in media. Thankfully I have not encountered much of it since that horrible experience with Keith Berwick. 

While I was a regular on the  Nancy Grace Show, I once again saw media  politics rear it’s ugly head with a  small- minded producer in my view,( who finally got his karmic justice and is longer in the media) Dean Sicoli. He would consistently  ban people from the show if they did other shows among other things.

GETTING THE INSIDE SCOOP FROM SENATOR FRED THOMPSON  ABOUT WHAT REAL POLITICS WAS LIKE 

Screen Shot 2017-02-07 at 10.57.02 PM.pngWhat made me detest politics even more was all that I learned about it when I was dating former and late Senator Fred Thompson. I had an earful of what really goes on as he shared with me the pettiness and ugliness of what really goes on with politicians behind the scenes. He always used to say to me  that he  agreed with former President Harry Truman who said “if you want a friend in Washington- get a dog.”

I met Fred years before he became a Senator on an airplane as we were seated next to one another. I was headed to be a judge in the Miss USA Pageant while he was headed to do some legal assignment after appearing in some television show in Los Angeles. We became fast and friends and remained dear friends for years, until we were both single at the same time and then began to date one another when he was a Senator in Washington.  

 Fred went into  politics for all the right reasons. He really  wanted to contribute something valuable to his country. And truth be told,  being born under the sign of  Leo, he also loved all the attention. When we would be in DC or in Nashville and people would call him Senator Thompson,he admitted that he got a kick out of it.

But that soon wore off as the reality of being a Senator and all that it entailed wasn’t as appealing as it looked on the outside.Now that he was on the inside, Fred was not a very happy camper so to speak. As time progressed, I could  also see a  change in him. He was no longer his  happy and jovial self. Instead, politics got to him and eventually took a serious toll on his health. He dropped out of politics and went back into acting and being a spokesperson.Then he died at 72. I am convinced that politics contributed to his ill health and shortened his life, with all the stress, backbiting and hostility. 

MY BEING WRONGLY ACCUSED OF BEING POLITICAL DURING OBAMA CAMPAIGN 

Screen Shot 2017-02-10 at 10.54.46 AM.png When President Obama ran for office, I made some body language and communication comments as I had done with candidates throughout  the previous decades. While most  people saw my point of view, there were two females , whom I went to high school with but with whom I never associated with in high school,  who really let me have it.  Apparently they were staunch Obama supporters and took offense at what I said.

There was no reasoning with them. There was no convincing them that my blog was NOT  about politics but rather about body language and during the first debate Obama didn’t do very well as he openly admitted. I merely analyzed what went on between he and Romney during the debate.

The former high school  girls became uglier and uglier and more and more hostile towards me. Their ugliness was so blatant, that my loyal  Facebook fan base defended me against these two terrors.   But,they too,   found that they  couldn’t  reason with these ignorant women.  So I blocked these two as I had no room for such hate.

When I  learned years later, that one of the women who was  trying to organize a high school reunion had  purposely left my photo out as a  “Senior of Distinction” in her  promotion of the reunion event,  I clearly  saw the root of her toxicity as it was her obvious jealousy that reared it’s  ugly head.  

FACEBOOK HATE AND NO WIN DURING TRUMP AND CLINTON  ANALYSIS

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In the Trump/ Clinton this election, I was regularly accused of  being -political and biased during this election  by people who had no clue about me or my beliefs or thoughts, or why I detest politics as I have described above. Their  accusations could not have been further from the truth. It was very frustrating because no matter how many times I explained myself, there were always the ignorant who would insist I was biased and  supported one candidate over  the other.

 I simply reported what I saw and heard during the campaign trail and debates. When I said something positive about Hillary, Trump supporters let me have it and when I said something positive about Trump, Hillary supporters let me have it. There was no winning here.

I didn’t care about anything other than   how they came across, yet people tried to pin their politics on me .  I was having none of it! So I fought back defending my observations. And I have to tell you that fighting with so many people on a daily basis was beyond exhausting and depressing.  

One man whom I  adored and had known along with his super famous television icon wife whom I also adored, really laid into me one night on Facebook. Apparently, he was an avid Hillary  supporter. It was a back and forth of his hate for Trump and my defending myself that I could care less about anything other than the candidate’s speaking skills and body language. He finally got the message  and came to his senses as he  realized what I was talking about all along that had nothing to do with politics. So he apologized to me.

Even so, it left me battle scarred. It’s like someone stepping on your bare toes when they are wearing six inch heels. Even though they say they are sorry and say” excuse me”, the pain of their heel on your naked toe  does not go away so quickly. It’s the same thing with emotional pain. 

DROPPING FACEBOOK FRIENDS AND BEING DROPPED 

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Then there were some really great Facebook friends who I really liked who were so warm and wonderful and supportive. I liked them them so much. Unfortunately for both of us, they  wrongly assumed  I supported one candidate over the other and dropped me as a friend . I still miss them. 

I didn’t drop anyone because of  who they supported. However,  I must admit that I am seeing a lot of death related posts towards Trump on one FB friend’s posts that makes me want to drop her now. While I don’t care which candidate you support  or hate ,  death fantasies and killing posts are NOT acceptable. So I will most likely drop her if she continues with her rhetoric. 

I did drop Lisa Bloom, not because she supported Hillary but because of  her political and press manipulation where she and her mother Gloria Allred  paraded so many women accusers of Trump  who were obviously having a hard time with the truth based on my observations and estimations.

I couldn’t stand this no matter who the candidate was .  When I saw her hold a presser for a woman who was clearly deceptive and  admitted she lied when she falsely accused Trump of child rape and didn’t show up at the presser I felt Lisa Bloom’s credibility was over forever as far as I was concerned. 

KNOWING AND LIKING BOTH CANDIDATES 

I actually knew both candidates and liked BOTH of them. They were always  respectful  and gracious and  warm towards me whenever we met. So I had no “dog in this fight” so to speak. I even met Bill Clinton. He had such a special knack for making one feel as though they were the only one in the room as I experienced. 

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POLTICS – ACTORS and PERFORMERS

While anyone can use their public fan base to express themselves, I don’t think actors and singers have it in their best interest to do so. Their aim is to entertain and to get as many eyeballs as possible on them in order to do this.  It is a business they are in – a show business and if they alienate 1//2 their fan base they are not doing doing good” show” business. 

While many don’t care at this point like Robert Deniro and Meryl Streep who spoke at an awards ceremony about Trump and Barbara Streisand who kept interjecting Trump hate at her  $750 a person concert I attended in Los Angeles, it may  be their box office and the companies that employ them who may suffer in the long term. 

CROSSING THE LINE- MADONNA AND SARA SILVERMAN

There is no question that Madonna, Ashley Judd and Sara Silverman have crossed the  line by speaking violence and hate and anarchy. It is UNACCEPTABLE and I believe they should be held accountable for what they said. Whomever speaks of blowing up the White House and having a military coup needs to be investigated and  punished in my view.

They have a lot of influence including influence over people who may not be that mentally balanced. Look at Charles Manson He didn’t actually kill anyone with his bare hands. But he  was the mastermind and the  influencer and it cost him a life behind bars.

And now for the Pope.  Pope Francis has a tremendous influence and he MUST keep his nose OUT of AMERICAN POLITICS ! He needs to focus on the horrible pedophiles who rape little innocent  children and continue to do so as we have recently discovered. He needs to take care of ALL of the issues in the Catholic church before he even utters a peep about American politics.

MY ANALYSIS PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP

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As I have continued to do in the media, I  will ONLY speak of Trump’s body language and NOT his politics, ideas,  goals, nor his agenda, Those issues are way out of my level of expertise. I ONLY stick to what I know and I do it accordingly. 

I will  not speak kindly or unkindly about Trump . Instead I will ONLY speak the TRUTH as I see it. I will NEVER hold back ever. I will say what I see and what I hear form ONLY my point of view as it pertains to body language and communication.

 

 

 

Chuck Schumer Body Language Reveals Toxic Manipulation Dragging Refugees On Stage Phony Gestures, and Fake Tears

 

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He brings a handsome Syrian family on stage  with the women dressed in scarves and three cute children.

Screen Shot 2017-01-30 at 8.01.02 PM.pngHe eyes the father. As he parades this “newly arrived family” of immigrants on stage, it seems very contrived and manipulative to me. It appears Schumer is doing this for his own agenda not for this family as they look traumatized being on stage.

Screen Shot 2017-01-30 at 8.04.32 PM.pngAll children look sad and uncomfortable as you can see in the photo above.

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As he reads his speech there is no emotion and no inflection as it appears to be a monotonous drone. There is no passion in the speech as she says that he is saying No to Trump’ executive order. He rarely looks up as he reads from his script.

Screen Shot 2017-01-30 at 8.10.34 PM.png ASshe says so many are opposed to this order we see him raised his finger in a rehearsed manner that looks awkwards. It is an upward point which is not showing true anger. True anger would be shown by a direct point with finger extended and pointer lower  not upwards as he has it positioned.

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He continues to sound boring and emotionless as he reads his script as he discusses the military.He then says something ridiculous that it makes lone wolves  are not so lone after all and their acts occur more not less. This  statement is nonsense as most lone wolves are usually beholden to some cause, doctrine , or group as they commit acts of terror.

Screen Shot 2017-01-30 at 9.13.49 PM.pngHe does not seem upset at all facially throughout the speech as he even leaks out several smiles. This indicates that he appears to be enjoying his moment on stage.

Once again there is no vocal emotion as he speaks as she is saying negative things about Trump’s program.

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He then refers to “the beauty of these people” which is so phony and contrived as he says it. It further validates that he is using ” these people” as props for his own agenda.He purses his lips for emphasis, after he says this which is further indication of his phoniness as this is  a conflicting facial gesture to what eh just said.

His phoniness continues as he stammers as he reads from his script and says let me tell you about this family. Clearly he is reading about this family and shows know emotion or no real knowledge of this family he is using as a political prop.

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Asn he talks about the father he looks down as he continues to read about the man and awkwardly  seeks out the man’s shoulder in an attempt to show how much he cares about the man. It is blatantly contrived and phony and insincere.

Then he ridiculous slaps the poor man on thr shoulder in an aggressive gesture as eh said that the man came here because he translated for the Americans and got death threats for helping American soldiers. This is not some poor refugee that was injured or wounded in the war and left to die and rescued  he was an employee paid by Americans for his translation services for  whom he is serving and should very well be protected by his employer- the Americans. This is what is usually done and everyone knows it. yet Schumer is making it seem like this is some unusual case and that his man is some type of hero.

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Schumer makes a  fist as he continues to exploit this poor man who doesn’t seem to happy with being paraded on stage and used as a prop as you can see by his facial expression. To further illustrate Schumer’s phoniness her doesn’t even look at the man. As he speaks he continues to stumble on his words, further indicating that he is manipulating and using this man to make his point.

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Then he stumbles on the name of the next family he seeks to publicly exploit on stage. He rocks back and forth as he speaks indicating his discomfort and lack of sincerity. he then points upawrds  to the little girl maya who is 16  which makes her shirk away from him. The finger point is an angry gesture and the upward finger in the context in which he is using it is incongrous with what he is saying. This  further indicates how contrived and phony this is.

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Then he points to Hamza and reads that  he turned 14 yesterday, Haza 8, and Hara 6 as he lays his hands on these two younger children which obviously makes the older  16 year old child feel uncomfortable as you can see by her expression ,

The Schumer bangs on the podium with his hand as he says the family arrived a month ago This would have been an angry gesture but there is no anger in his voice He then elks out a smile as he says their parents ( in laws) are American citizens.  So even though he is feigning anger his gestures and facial expression are totally inconsistent with the words he is saying which means he is being phony and manipulative. He even stammers and stumbles as he says what section  in the  Bronx the parents live.

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He then uses another phy inconsistent gestures as he raises his hands and says that Trump wants us to believe that all  immigrants are terrorists when they are not but rather like these families. First of all Trump never said this and Schumer knows this . That his why one hand shows his fingers spread out and the other hand shows his fingers close together.If his gestures indicted honestly his hands would BOTH display  open  fingers in his gesturing.

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He then leaks out as smile as he says they aren’t a threat to American but a promise to America. WE all know these people are not a threat to America and he knows it too. he also knows that these are not the people Trump is referring to in terms of being a threat to America. That is why Schumer leaks out a smile as an indication of dupid delight. he knows exactly what he is doing- being manipulative and trying to pull at people’s heartstrings by using this family. But it is not working as his phoniness belies him.

Then he looks down and taps two times on the podium which makes no sense.  he then looks down and fumbles through his papers as he reads a quote from the Old Testament ( Exodus) the  New Testament ( Matthew) and then he brings up a quote by Catholic comments  Pope Frances ( who in my view has no business sticking his two cents into politics especially when his own flock  of priests are a complete disaster with raping young children and destroying them forever.)As he reads what Pope Frances says he raises his awkward finger and says “This is the Pope speaking” As you can see from the expression the children’s faces they could care less. They are bored and can’t wait to get out of their and end their exploitation.

The Schumer embarrassingly invokes the name of his dead relative Ellis whom he was named after  who was named after Ellis Island. As she does this is  manipulative and corney behavior shows clearly.

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Then for his final act he musters up a FAKE CRY with no tears as he calls trump mean spirited.

Screen Shot 2017-01-30 at 10.10.22 PM.png As you can see there are no dripping tears, He just held his eyes open without clinking which caused the to glisten. But it was NOT a real cry. if that was the case you would ee a downward turn in his mouth which was not evident.

And then we see what his real agenda is-  getting some press time and promoting himself as he mentions he is a Senator from NY and how he will fight and scrap with all of his being to overturn Trump’s directive.

The bottom line is that the cry was phony and his dragging these poor families on stage with him was contrived and manipulative to further his own agenda.

 

 

Body language reveals insight into relationship Between Melania and Donald

 

Body language expert Patti Wood said there were only a few moments that showed love between the pair. Picture: AFP/Saul Loeb.

President and Mrs. Trump couldn’t be a better match as you can gauge a lot from  their body language. They are a perfect match even though  come from different backgrounds.  She’s very accommodating, and he has a large ego and needs a lot of attention.

Donald Trump could never be with a wife who is competing for the limelight, and so for his personality type and her personality type, they couldn’t be a better match.

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Melania understands her husband very well and looks up to him in admiration.  She seems to be willing to put up with a lot.

Donald Trump ran ahead, leaving his wife, First Lady Melania Trump, behind. Picture: Mark Wilson/Getty Images.

That includes leaving her trailing behind as he made his way towards former President Obama and Michelle. Maybe he was caught up in the moment and the excitement of the day, but to me it was still rude and cannot be overlooked. Personally, I would find it quite unsettling  if my man did that the me. In Western culture it is considered rude to walk in front of someone and leave then trailing behind.

We have come from eight years of the Obamas where we have see the opposite  of Melania and Donald’s dynamic as Barack constantly showered Michelle with affection and adoration.   In fact Barack kissed Michelle’s hand and comforted her as they were leaving for the helicopter. he sensed she was sad and his kiss was a reflection of how much attention he paid to her feelings.

Body language expert Dr Lillian Glass said you cannot compare the relationship between the Trumps and the Obamas. Picture: AFP/Jim Watson.

In all fairness,  you cannot really compare the relationship between the Trumps and the Obamas because the two couples have stemmed from very different circumstances.

 

Barack and Michelle married young. She was his boss, and they fell in love so they have had  a whole life together Trump, on the other hand, has been married two times before, so it’s a whole different kettle of fish.

US President Donald Trump and the first lady Melania Trump dance at the Liberty Ball at the Washington DC Convention Center. Picture: AFP/Molly Riley.

Melania is the opposite of Donald in that she appears to be more  reserved as she shies away from the limelight. Donald, on the other hand  is more outgoing, outspoken, and craves the limelight. That is why they work well together as a couple and will continue to do so throughout Donald’s Presidency.   They are a perfect case example of how opposites can not only attract but they can work out long term.

 

Dr Lillian Glass, who has been studying body language for three decades, said the Trumps ‘couldn’t be a better match’. Picture: AP Photo/Evan Vucci.

 No matter what your political views are you have to admit that they do make a stunning couple. Aside from Jacqueline Kennedy, no one has  looked more beautiful, glamourous , poised and  so well put together as Melania. The dress she wore to the Swearing In Ceremony was Jackie Kennedy inspired ( the collar) but a clever variation thereof. Fashion-wise there is no doubt that she will be an inspiration, just like Kate Middleton.

 

Toxic Rosie O’Donnell Insinuates Baron Trump is Autistic as Tweet and Video Show How A Little Information In the Wrong Hands Can Be Dangerous

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The ongoing Donald Trump vs Rosie O’Donnell Feud (which Rosie started when she attacked Trump’s looks when she was on the View)  took huge turn when O’Donnell hit below the belt and had the audacity to bring 10 year old Baron Trump into the fray with a  claim that  he may be autistic.

All I can say is HOW DARE HER? She is not a doctor, psychologist, therapist, neurologist, behavior expert, or even a body language expert. Her diagnostic technique is not formal or professional. Instead, she outs her own 3 year old  daughter and says that her daughter was recently diagnosed with autism and that she recognizes the signs in Baron. Well her daughter is not Baron and she did not formally diagnose the boy.

I am  appalled at Rosie  for even bringing this up in her horrible tweet :

Barron Trump Autistic? if so – what an amazing opportunity to bring attention to the AUTISM epidemic https://t.co/Acgy1Qxyqi via @YouTube

— Rosie (@Rosie) November 22, 2016

Apparently there was a video that was posted by a  YouTube user named  James Hunter, titled “Is Barron Trump Autistic? #StopTheBullying” which apparently  shows examples of Barron’s behavior at public events. The video has been viewed more than 2.5 million times since it was posted Nov. 11.

It showed Barron clapping at the Republican National Convention and points out “his hands are moving erratically and not touching each other.” The video also shows him “making strange movements in his seat, typical in children with autism.”

“One of the biggest signs of autism is a lack of social skills and understanding,” the video said. “When Barron came on stage at the RNC his anti-social behavior was on display.”

It goes on to show Barron standing blank-faced on stage as his parents and siblings smile and clap. Then it shows Barron shrugging off an affectionate squeeze from his father.

In my view, this  is how a little information in the wrong hands- the hands of James Hunter who is also not a doctor can go awry. This incident also shows how someone with a huge following like Rosie O’Donnell can create even more havoc.

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The ONLY ones who know if Baron has autism is his neurologist, physician, parents, and family members- no one else! Baron’s mother Melania has fought back and has threatened to sue the video maker and made suggesting that Rosie may be next in line for perpetuating what she claims in a lie as he insists Baron does not have autism.That is the right thing to do in order to put a stop to this potentially damaging labeling behavior, especially if it is not true as Melania says.

To play devil’s advocate- what if he does have it? Why put Baron on display and label him with something he may or may not have that can have serious implications on his future?

He may just be a shy or introverted type of young man. One thing for sure is that he was very disciplined as he stood up on the stage for such a long time without moving around while his President – Elect father gave his victory speech. Body language wise it was impressive behavior from any 10 year old child  or any adult, whether they were autistic or not.

As far as Baron looking blank- faced as the video stated, there may be other reasons for this besides autism. He may be simply uncomfortable with large crowds and with being suddenly thrown into the limelight.  He may be unhappy about having to be thrust out in public which may show on his face. Some children relish and bask in the limelight, while others retreat.

When the video said he shrugged off an affectionate squeeze from his father, I say  that many ten year old boys do not welcome open affection in public as it often embarrasses them. So in my view,  there was nothing atypical or “autistic” about that. The same holds true for the reported “strange clapping.” Personally, I didn’t see anything strange about Baron’s clapping. Once again it may seem odd to him that he has to now  be clapping for his dad in a context in whch he is not familiar.”

Baron may simply be a shy young man, just  like his mother Melania seems to be. He may not be comfortable in the public eye like his sister Ivanka or brothers Donny and Eric. Instead, he may also be shy like  his sister Tiffany.

Being in the public eye and knowing how to comport yourself takes  lot of time and practice. Even the best of celebrities feel uncomfortable. I should know as I have treated many of them personally. Throughout the years I have helped countless high profile people whom you would assume would be comfortable and at ease in any public arena, with their speaking and body language during talk show appearances, Academy Award speeches, and public speaking performances. So it is needless to say that a 10 year old boy may not be comfortable in this arena.

And let’s say for argument’s  sake that Baron may be on the spectrum. I say, “so what!” I know many incredibly successful people who were diagnosed and who function quite well. In fact I just had lunch with a wonderful producer-director last week who told me of his diagnosis. It certainly didn’t stop him from getting Emmy’s an Academy award, having a loving wife with whom he has been married for several decades, and two happy, well adjusted and successful children. It didn’t stop me from wanting to do some business with him. I also know a very successful attorney who hates  public gatherings and social events. At one time he confided in me that as an adult he was diagnosed with being on the spectrum. Once again his diagnosis didn’t hurt his career or his appeal from the ladies, who evidently found his shyness and perceived awkwardness as endearing. Comedian Jerry Seinfeld has publicly admitted he may have the disorder and it certainly didn’t hurt him as he has thrived with an incredibly successful comedy career, a beautiful wife and children.

If Baron does happen to be on the spectrum, he may in fact  be the “new normal”. In  2014 the CDC observed 1 in 68 births had a spectrum disorder. In 2015 the figure rose to 1 in 45. The figures are not yet in for 2016 but there does appear to be an increase in the disorder.

Whether Baron does or does not have the disorder, he needs to be off limits, just like the Obamas made Sasha and Malika off limits. That is why the Clintons tried to make Chelsea off limits when Bill was President. I will never forget how horribly cruel the press and the public was to their daughter Chelsea when she was younger. They constantly  commented on how ugly she looked and how awkward she appeared in her behavior. And the end result is that she grew up to be poised and attractive with a loving husband and two children and there is apparent talk about her hitting the political stage in the future.

There has been considerable backlash against Rosie O’Donnell for her comments and rightfully so. Her friends and her foes have let it be known that her behavior has transcended politics and personal feuding. Now she ventured into seriously unacceptable and dangerous territory.

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

 

Body Language and Speech Shows A Very Different Donald Trump on 60 Minutes- More Subdued and Sombre

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First and foremost, I was so impressed with 60 Minutes journalist Leslie Stahl. She was professional, as she has been throughout the campaign. She was gracious, elegant,  and a pleasure to watch. Other journalists should take heed and follow her example.

Now that Donald Trump is President Elect, I believe someone has to tell him to clean up his makeup.Not to be mean but he looks like an albino racoon with all that non-made up white skin around his eyes. I think that the orange hue that people have been discussing since he decided  to run for office is a spray tan.  Perhaps the reason his eyes look so white may be due to his using those eye protection goggles after getting the spray tan. Since his skin is tanned or oranged and he doesn’t need a full on makeup applied. So, he may want to carry a little liquid makeup with him to put under his eyes and on his lids. He may also want to get some dark blond or light brown mascara to bring out his lashes. Since he is vain and is concerned about looks and looking his best, this information can improve his on-camera appearance.

Trump said that on election night when he won, he went completely silent. I mentioned in previous blogs that he was stunned by his win as well and was taking the time to process everything. His body language showed this. That is why he looked as though he was going to cry when he arrived on stage for his victory speech. It was and still is a shock to him. He said that he realized that this is a whole different life for him now.

Perhaps that is why throughout the interview we saw a completely different Donald Trump than we saw on television or on the campaign trail.   There was no loud tones or blustering. There was no over the top rhetoric. In essence, there was no showmanship that we have seen him display for the past 18 months.

When he spoke about Hillary’s call to him, he said it was a lovely call and imagined it was a tough one for her to make. He was very soft spoken and gracious when he mentioned Hillary, which leads me to believe that all the anger he displayed towards her and all the threats he made to her  ( like locking her up) seem to have dissipated. He even spoke of Bill Clinton’s call, saying that it was an amazing run. When asked if he had any regrets for the nasty tone of the campaign he looked down and thought about it.

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While he said he had no regrets because it got him here  to the Presidency, his body language said that he did indeed have some regrets. After hearing him speak, it seemed to me that deep down he does respect Hillary’s political experience and he does actually like her. After all, he has known and supported her for decades. She even said how he would make a good candidate to run for President and he has sung her praises for years. He then said he wished it was nicer and softer and more on policy,which supports what I just observed in terms of his body language.

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Regarding his meeting with Obama, which he said could have lasted 4 hours, he said Obama told him the good things and the bad things. He wanted to learn all he could about Obama’s views on the middle east because he will be inheriting this. But as he spoke about Obama, there was not a smile or any warmth. I think he was being professional in his statements, but I stick to my previous observations, which I shared with the media that there is no love lost between the two. He said he found Obama to be terrific, very smart and very nice, which may be all  true. But  as he said this he shook his head “no,” which may indicate that even though he may think those things about Obama, there is  perhaps still a negative charge after all that was said  during the campaign. It is clear that Obama may have welcomed into the White House on a superficial level, but not  on a deep level. If that were the case, we would  see more smiles and facial enthusiasm.

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Leslie then said that he looked pretty sober sitting in the White House with Obama. He then replied that he is a sober person. Perhaps this sober person is the real Donald Trump and the one we saw on the campaign trail was the showman Donald Trump who riled people up to get their vote. He then said his actions in the White House  showed respect for the office and the President. I believe that. I believe that his going to the White House and sitting along site of the President gave him a  “huuuuuge ” reality check.

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Leslie Stahl brilliantly asked him if it was awkward being with one another in light of what they each said about one another. Trump said they never discussed it. But deep down those comments can never be forgotten as words leave indelible scars. He said from his standpoint there was  zero awkwardness. But from Obama’s standpoint there was clearly some awkwardness.

He also said that he will conduct himself well in the White House, but he may be rougher if the situation calls for it, which seemed to be an honest assessment of himself. He also said he didn’t want to be that monotoned character, which I agree with. In essence, he was saying that he wanted to be authentic.

Here’s what he said we can expect in his Presidency.

  1. There will be a wall and a fence in certain areas.
  2. He just said he would deport gang members and drug dealers deported  ( 2 million of them) not regular good people as he just wants to secure the borders.
  3. He will lower taxes.
  4. He will change health care to make it more affordable.
  5.  He wants to get rid of lobbyists and special interest groups.

When Leslie said all his transition team is lobbyists, he said that is all the people who are down there as that is what is wrong with the system. He phumphered a bit as she busted him on this as it is a real issue for him. It may have sounded hypocritical to those listening to it. He said the whole place is one big lobbyist and he wants to get rid of them even though he is relying on them now and wants to phase it out.

6. He will have term limits.                                                                                                                             7. There will be restrictions on foreign money coming into the county.                                          8. He will quickly appoint someone to the supreme court who will be pro life and pro second amendment                                                                                                                                         9.If Roe vs Wade were overturned he said it would go back to the states.                                        10. He will continue to use twitter  in moderation as a form of modern communication.  11.He will be focusing on jobs, health care, the border, and immigration  as opposed to putting Hillary in jail. He also said he didn’t want to hurt them as they are good people.       12. He will find out more about Comey when he  speaks with him directly.                                    13. He won’t take any vacation.                                                                                                                     14. He will only accept $1 as salary for being President.

When asked point blank, if he was intimidated or scared by the gravity of the enormous situation he is taking on, he answered “no” without hesitation, which leads me to believe that he feels confident he is up to it and can handle the job of the Presidency.

She said people are scared and are demonstrating right now. He said it is only because they don’t know him. This may very well be true as all we know is what we heard on the campaign,  in the media, and what he said 11 years ago on a bus to Billy Bush about women and their privates.

He believes many of the the demonstrators are professional protesters.He also said he would tell people to not be afraid and that there is a double standard with him and Hillary’s supporters. He also firmly told his supporters to not make racial slurs or incite violence as he said his aim is to bring the country together.

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In fact, he looked right into the camera and told everyone to STOP IT! He  was talking about his supporters stopping any harassment towards blacks, muslims, and latinos.

This was a completely Donald Trump.This was a much more subdued and professional Donald Trump. He spoke openly and was forthright. Now we will have to wait and see what he does.