Body Language and Speaking Advice From Dr. Lillian Glass to Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton During The Debates

The biggest debate of the century will take place Monday night on September 26, 2016. There is a lot riding on this debate because it will tell us so much about both candidates as we see them up close and personal.As a body language expert and communciation expert I am sharing my advice for ech of them indivudually and for both of them as candidates.

No matter how confident Donald Trump has come across in the past, there is no question that he may have a lot of concerns regarding this debate in terms of how to best handle himself. The same is true for Hillary Clinton. Trump may be wondering  how aggressive to come across towards Hillary, especially when there has been such public speculation with regard to her health issues. Hillary onthe other hand, may be wondering how to address Trump  should he come out swinging- verbally that is.

The key body language tell that viewers will be looking for deals with the level of the candidate’s confidence. Do they come across Presidential or not? Do they do or say things that reflect the office? Do they show tentativeness or nervousness?

So what are the signs to look for to help us determine if  a candidate is nervous vs confident?  Here is a list below: They may be                                                                         a.  perspiring indicated by wiping their face or hands  or sweat above upper lip and forehead                                                                                                                                                        b.rocking back and forth or fidgeting                                                                                               c.having extraneous hand movements                                                                                                     d. saying like um or uh a lot                                                                                                                         e. licking their lips a lot                                                                                                                                   f. taking deep breaths to oxygenate themselves                                                                                   g. looking down                                                                                                                                                   h. talking too fast                                                                                                                                               i. taking too slow                                                                                                                                                j. not getting to the point                                                                                                                               k. rambling and talking too much                                                                                               l.excessive eye blinking                                                                                                                                   m. throat clearing                                                                                                                                              n. nose pulling, scratching  or wiping                                                                                                          o. face scratching

Many of these “tells” can also signify whether the candidate is telling the truth or lying That is why you must listen for the context as deception can only be discovered in the specific context. For instance if Hillary is asked about her emails and you see any of these body language tells, it may indicate that she may not be telling the truth. Similarly, if Trump is asked about his taxes and you see any of these signs in the context during which he was asked the specific question, then you may question whether or not he is forthright.

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The advice I have for Donald trump is

  1. Don’t talk about how great you are. We already know it as we have heard it way too often from you.                                                                                                                                           2. Don’t yell and get  overly hostile or aggressive. Keep your cool and show that you can be level headed under pressure.                                                                                            3.Use inflected and modulated tones so it doesn’t appear that you are shouting at Hillary, which will alienate people.                                                                                                    4. Don’t go over the top with high dramatics.                                                                                5. Stick to the issues and don’t get off point,no matter how  much you are tempted to do so.                                                                                                                                                           6. Keep being real with your gestures and body language as that is what makes people relate to you.                                                                                                                                                7. Tone it down by not doing or saying anything embarrassing as this is your moment to shine in front of 120 million people.
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The advice for Hillary is:

1. Do not cough as it will validate what so many feel about you- that you are ill. Take a cough suppressant before you go on stage so you won’t have that issue since they are not stopping the debate incase you have a choking fit.                                                                                 2. Get more animated. Don’t sound so boring.                                                                                  3.Don’t use that sing song cadence where you lose the message in terms of what you want to convey.                                                                                                                                                              4. Don’t shout to get key points across. Instead use inflection to make your point. 5. Stop with the phony pointing gestures used by JFK back in the 60’s because his speech coach said it was the right thing to do. It is NOT the right thing to do. If you are angry or you want to make a point- point with your pointer finger instead of  using that phony gesture where you pinch your pointer and index finger to your thumb.                                                                      5. Stop smiling when you are upset as it make you look phony.                                                        6. Don’t spin things as it only makes you look worse. Instead, tell the truth and if you messed up give a sincere apology.                                                                                                              7. Stop having a defensive tone. If you are upset let you face say ot along with your words.Make sure your facial expression matches the tone of what you are saying.

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And to both candidate here is some major advice:                                                                                   1. Please be respectful to one another. Both of you have worked extremely hard to get to this point and need to be commended on your victories thus far.                                                    2.Do not attack one another and say what the other candidate did or thinks. Let them speak for themselves without your putting words in their mouth to make them look bad. What you don’t realize is that when you do this, it make you look bad. So don’t get nasty and hit below the belt. Keep it classy and elegant.                                                                           3.Stick to the issues and get your specific  points across. Tell us what you will do without discussing your opponent in an attempt to make them look bad. Make yourself look good by not making the  other person look bad. All the voter is interested in is the issues not your personality.  We want to know how you really think and feel about  the issues athand and how it will affect our lives in the future.

 

Caitlyn Jenner’s Canceled Show May Be a Blessing In Disguise

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When Caitlyn Jenner  first made her transition from male to female, I filmed a segment at with her at her home, way on top of a hill in Malibu, for her show ( I am Cait). In our segment, there was some intensive voice and speech training that unfortunately never made it to air. I showed her videotape of herself  appearing on  Diane Sawyer’s 20/20 interview and  analyzed it. I relayed to her which speech, voice, and body language patterns were masculine and feminine and what she needed to work on. She seemed very receptive.  We then did  some speech, body language, and  vocal exercises. The story line was that I was supposed to tell her not to have surgery  on her vocal cords, which she was  supposedly considering in  order to sound more feminine. During our shoot, I told her that surgery was not a good idea. I also told her that there may be some dangers associated with the surgery that could harm her voice in the long run and that she instead, needed to do a regimine of vocal and speech and body language exercises. I also shared this in the confessional. Continue reading

Melania’s Mellifluous Voice and Elegant Composed Body Language During RNC Speech

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The stunning beauty, Melania Trump, wearing a gorgeous form fitting white dress, made her debut at the Republican Convention’s stage. As far as delivery and body language is concerned, Melania did extremely well, especially since she is not a public speaker, does not often speak in public, and the fact that English is not her native tongue. The tone of her voice was appealing and soothing. She was poised and composed vocally. Her accent in my view, was charming and her cadence, rhythm, and timing when she spoke  were excellent. She spoke with passion and inflection, especially when she spoke of husband Donald and what she believed he could do for the country.

Body language wise, her movements were fluid and elegant. She had a regal appearance with impeccable posture.

There is a  lot of talk about whether or not Melania’s speech was  original or whether it was the same as the speech given by Michelle Obama. It seems that they both spoke about education and their children, which seemed to be a mission on both of their parts. So it may be understandable that both messages may have been similar.

The bottom line is that she did an excellent job.  Should Donald Trump be the next President of the United States, it certainly appears that Melania,  as the First Lady, would handle herself with the same elegance and decorum  as she showed during her  RNC speech .

Once again, this is not a political stance as this is not a political blog. As an objective professional,  I  report what I see as it pertains to body language and what I hear as it pertains to communication patterns.

 

 

 

 

Dr. Lillian Glass Honored to Have Worked With Muhammad Ali to Help Him With His Voice and Speech

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Screen Shot 2016-06-03 at 8.41.38 PMIt was such an  honor and a privilege  for me to have worked  Muhammad Ali as my client when his voice was beginning to fail.  I will never forget the first day Muhammed walked into my offices on Bedford Drive in Beverly Hills, California, sat down, looked right at me  and said “Dr. Glass when you’ve been hit in the head 75,00 times it does something to you.” 
He came to see me because he noticed that he would often lose his voice whenever he spoke. It frustrated him that he couldn’t be heard. This was in his early stages of what was his Parkinson’s Disease. So we worked diligently  on his speech and voice skills.  Throughout our sessions,  I  helped him learn to  coordinate his breathing with his speech and to pay close attention  and focus on his abdominal  muscles whenever  he spoke,  in order to help him better  project his voice so that it  sounded stronger. The above photo is how  I remember him when we worked together.
Muhammad used to say that he loved coming to his sessions with me because my smile was like sunshine and that my smile  made him smile. He always let me know that he was grateful for my help, which humbled me.
He was also  so funny and we laughed a lot during our voice and speech sessions. He loved gadgets and always showed me his latest gadgets. Our sessions would often be interrupted by the ringing of  his briefcase  as he carried around  several of his phones in his briefcase. When multiple phones would ring at once he would laughingly  say ” Ah I hear a symphony.
During our sessions I really got to know him well and  was privileged to hear many of his behind the scene stories.
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He often spoke of his early days in Miami ( my hometown) and was  particularly impressed that I knew so much about his early boxing history in Miami  when he was  known as Cassius Clay ( thanks to my father and brother who were early fans of his).
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During our sessions, he would always come out with a verbal gem, an insight into life which had a great impact on me. Even though, I was his teacher and coach, he was my teacher as well. I  learned a lot from this magnificent and precious man. I learned about the gift of charisma, the gift of having self confidence , and the gift of  shining your light on others.
Muhammed you touched my heart and soul and you  will always be in my heart.  May You Rest in Peace.

Trump’s Body Language and Delivery Wins in Third Debate Despite Insulting Questions As Rubio and Cruz Impresses

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When Donald Trump was asked the most ugly and disrespectful question by  cnbc’s John Harwood, who publicly called him a narcissist and then further insulted Trump by calling him a cartoon character, Trump appropriately responded that ‘ it was not a nicely stated question.” He then went on to respond in a calm and collected manner. He was also the most real  and genuine in terms of his demeanor and what he said. For instance  he was the only candidate who gave an honest and open answer to  the question regarding his flaw ( that he was too trusting and he doesn’t forgive).

He was the only candidate who answered the question openly and honestly. The others all went into a rehearsed rhetoric  that had nothing to do with addressing their flaw. Instead they used that time to address what they felt was important in their campaign.This turned many people off.

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One of the biggest turnoffs was when Huckabee said he didn’t have any flaws and then went on to say to ask his wife. He did not gain any Presidential points for that. He was also rehearsed and made body language gestures which were contrived. His facial language did not reflect that he was being genuine.

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Carla Fiorino had the worst body language throughout the evening which made her appear annoying. Her cocked head made her seem insecure and her tone was very defensive. When she said that he flaw was that she didn’t smile and then went off topic it was a turn off. The tone of her voice needs a lot of work. A while back  Donald Trump made reference to her looks as he asked how people could look at her for four years. I say, how can anyone listen to that voice for 4 years as it is so annoying and off putting. She loses the message she is trying to send because  of it. Also annoying, are the extraneous movements she makes when she speaks. One could also see a glimpse into her character as she mentions her former boss  as an endorsement and claims he said that in retrospect she did things right. Then when the character  flaw of her boss is brought up, she immediately throws him under the bus and distances herself from him and says that is why they didn’t get along. To me it showed a lack of loyalty as she was willing to turn on a dime if it would make her look good. To many that was a turn off.

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And someone who has an equally annoying vocal tone is Ben Carson. His voice with his monotonous drone that dies off at the end of when he speaks  puts  one to sleep. He too loses his message because of his voice. His voice lacks energy and passion.  His mono-faced expression also lacks enthusiasm and confuses his message.

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While his gestures were a bit contrived at times and his voice  and delivery stilted Marco Rubio came across as very level headed and in control. He came across as a peacemaker who wouldn’t take the bait when he was insulted. This was evident in his retort to Jeb Bush, who came across as weak and whiney. Rubio took the high road which made him sound like a leader. While he was bashed by Bush, Rubio responded in an opposite manner as he said he had respect for Bush. He also said he was not in competition with anyone on the stage and refused to say negative things about them. This gave Rubio points while the bashing and whining Bush lost many points.

Screen Shot 2015-10-28 at 8.37.45 PMWhile his pitch is a bit too high and his voice is whiney Ted Cruz said the best thing of the evening. He was real and genuine and said what was on the mind of many viewers. He called the panel on their ugly questions and what many felt was unprofessional behavior.

” The questions that have been asked so far in this debate illustrate why the American people don’t trust the media,’ Cruz said. He then went on to say,  ‘This is not a cage match. And, you look at the questions — “Donald Trump, are you a comic-book villain?” “Ben Carson, can you do math?” “John Kasich, will you insult two people over here?” “Marco Rubio, why don’t you resign?” “Jeb Bush, why have your numbers fallen?”‘How about talking about the substantive issues the people care about?’

CNBC host John Harwood didn’t like that so he tried to go to another candidate and discuss  another issue, but Cruz wouldn’t let him. He called Harwood on his toxic behavior and asked  ‘You don’t want to hear my answer?’
to which Harwood sharply responded, in a nasty tone ‘You spent your time on something else.’

Cruz clearly got points for this as he showed that he was direct and called it like it is.

So the winners of the evening in terms of their body language, facial language an delivery were Trump, Rubio, and Cruz. The loser of the evening was the nasty CNBC panel who were out to be provocative in an attempt to garner a name for themselves and increase ratings. But unfortunately for them, their attempts backfired.

Trump, Christe Show Genuine Body Language Fiorina’s Voice Annoys While Jeb’s is Monotone During Debates

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Donald Trump emerged as  winner again in terms of his body language and delivery  as did Chris Christie. Both were genuine and spoke directly to the people. They weren’t rehearsed and they both showed a lot of energy. They got their message across with passion and conviction

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Another candidate who did very well in the debates was Marco Rubio. he was well spoken and articulate and his gestures matched what he was conveying verbally.

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While  Carla Fiorina’s looks may not the issue and Trump did apologize to her in his own way by telling her she looked lovely,  her voice pattern left a lot to be desired. It was creaky,  labored and staccato, monotone  and she often sounded rehearsed, especially when giving a speech about Lady Liberty. Her voice pattern in my view is annoying. There is no doubt that she needs some serious voice coaching if she is to be heard and if she wants to get her message across.

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Also needing vocal help is Jeb Bush. Trump is right in that he lacks energy and enthusiasm when he speaks and sounds very boring and monotone.

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Rand Paul not only sounded monotoned but was monofaced. He looked haggard and angry throughout the debate. His voice pattern also sounded nasal and did not resonate well.

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The same holds true for Dr. Ben Carson. He too is monotone and his tones are lack luster.  He sounds boring. His face is also monotoned in terms of  exhibiting facial animation. Perhaps his best exchange was with Trump when he said that Trump was an OK doctor.

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Scott Walker  often phumphered  and stammered  during the debates which made him seem unsure of himself.

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Ted Cruz’s voice sound high pitched and nasal which is off putting. Instead of talking to the audience or to the moderators like the other candidates did, he looked into the camera. This  seemed contrived, as he shared an obviously rehearsed message.

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Huckabee  also sounded rehearsed and contrived . In addition,  his gestures were rehearsed and mechanical and did not match the content of what he was saying. His looking directly into the camera when she spoke which did not make him appear genuine.

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While Lindsey Graham’s Southern accent may be charming, he often sounds monotone and his gestures do not match what he is saying.  Many of his gestures made no sense in relationship to what he was saying as you can see in the photo above.

With the exception of Trump, Christie and Rubio, the rest of the candidates could use some serious vocal and body language coaching to improve the way they come across during the debates.

Once again this is NOT a political piece. This is merely a blog about the way these candidate’s presented themselves in front of millions of people during the debates.

Dr. Lillian Glass Worked to Feminize Caitlyn Jenner Voice and Body Language

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I had the opportunity to work with Caitlyn Jenner to try to help her feminize her voice, speech patterns and body language. Our session was filmed for her reality show I’m Cait. Unfortunately it will not be shown this season. But my management team at Sirena Media received this  very nice email from the show’s producer:

Hi Karin!
Unfortunately, that scene did not make it into the series. We had to make some tough cuts because we filmed for 12 weeks but only ended up with eight 42 minute episodes. We so appreciate Lilian working with Cait and all the help she offered and maybe we can have her back next season.
Best of luck to you both and thank you again!

Andrea Metz
Executive Producer

So there is a possibility I may be on her show next season. Because I am bound by a confidentiality agreement I signed with Bunim Murray, Caitlyn’s production company I can’t go into detail as to what specific work I did with Caitlyn and what we specifically discussed during our time together.

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I will say that she was a lovely and I thoroughly enjoyed working with her and let her know that I am totally there for her.

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I will say that I used the same techniques that I used to teach Dustin Hoffman how to sound like a woman for the film in which he won an Academy Award- Tootsie

We addressed vocal pitch, using more inflection, drawing out vowels so the tones are more flowing, slowing down the speech, using more feminine gestures from sitting, to standing, to head posture, to facial language as well as gesturing,  like gesturing towards the body as opposed to away from the body like I am showing here when I Dustin played the Dorothy Michael’s character.

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While it takes more than the three hour session I had with Caitlyn while we filmed the show, I was able to give Caitlyn a copy of my best selling book He Says She Says Closing the Communication Gap Between the Sexes. The book contains all the information you will ever need to know about how men and  women communicate. It discusses differences in voice, body language, speech, and behavior, what is said and how it is said.

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In fact it has just been released on  Amazon  for kindle

http://www.amazon.com/He-Says-She-Closing-Communication-ebook/dp/B0102Q2G3A/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

There is also an audio version on my website at http://www.drlillianglass.com http://www.drlillianglass.com

This book can not only be of benefit to the transgender community but can help anyone who wants to have better communication with the opposite sex in business, in their social life, and in their intimate life.

Having worked with many people in the transgender community, perhaps the most difficult aspect of their transition is to sound   like the opposite sex. To sound like a  woman (for those undergoing male to female transition as Caitlyn is doing), or to sound like a man (for those undergoing female to male transition) it takes time and a lot of hard work. It takes the knowledge of knowing exactly what to do and what the differences are for the specific sex one is transitioning to. It also takes a lot of practice and a lot of patience.

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I read in Caitlyn’s blog  several weeks ago that when she watched the video of herself  speaking at the ESPY Awards, she said that she still felt like she had a man’s voice. It is understandable for her to feel that way  as you can’t learn how to sound like a woman and have it become a part of your daily life in just one session. It takes time and a lot of practice.

I was able to assure Caitlyn that what she was feeling was not out of the ordinary and to be patient.  I communicated to her that she not be hard on herself because working on feminizing your voice is a process and cannot be done in only one session as we did for the show.

I  encouraged her to not focus on  what she thought she did wrong, but instead, focus on the many things she did right during her ESPY Speech  such as:

1. flowing out her tones

3. using her inflection ( going up several notes)

4 not having a choppy speech pattern

5. opening her jaw when you spoke

6. not speaking so fast

7. not having a creaky sound at the end of sentences (glottal fry)

8. using many feminine gestures.

9. not attacking her initial sounds when she spoke

I clearly let her know that I was very proud of her. I also reiterated specific things she needed to work on in the future regarding the way she spoke so that she would be more satisfied and not see or hear herself as sounding like a man.

Working with Caitlyn was a very rewarding experience for me as I shared with  Caitlyn’s  my knowledge  of what it takes to sound like her genuine self- a woman.  I found her to be a lovely, elegant, and beautiful  woman who was very eager to incorporate all that we discussed.

She is truly an inspiration not only to the transgender community, but to so many others who are motivated by her  personal  decision to live an authentic and honest life and to be true to herself. At age 65, she decided to live out her dream, which goes to prove that it is never too late in life to do what you really want to do with your life. I have the utmost respect for anyone who is true to themselves, regardless of what anyone else may say.