Dr. Lillian Glass’ Communication and Handshaking Advice to Trump To Make Friends and Influence People

screen-shot-2016-11-13-at-6-26-44-pmThere is no question that  Presidential Candidate Donald Trump, did it “his way” and won the election.  But now that he is the President, as a 30 year veteran communication expert,  I would like to offer him some very useful advice. I  recommend that he tone down “his way” in terms of how he communicates publically. The bragging, self aggrandizement, constant self reference, lack of humility, using over inflated terms terms like “never in the history as anyone…” as it pertains to his achievements  needs to stop immediately.

 It is starting not to  work with friends and supporters and it is definitely not working with foes. It is merely adding fuel to their fire.

The universal rule of communication is  humility.  No one responds well to a braggart. No one likes to hear someone tell how great they are even if they invested a cure for cancer and solved the national debt. First and foremost, he must STOP constantly talking about himself and bragging on himself and saying how great he is. He needs others to say that about him. He does not need to say it about himself.

While  it may have worked with the late  boxer  Muhammed Ali, it was often tongue and cheek and said with humour.  It even worked for Trump when he was a celebrity and entertainer. But as a President,  it looks awful when Trump says it about himself. As a world leader, it  smacks of arrogance, self absorption,  and insecurity. It is  just plain bad form.

No matter where you live in the world, there is no doubt you were raised hearing the saying “don’t get big headed” or “don’t get too big for your britches,” don’t brag about yourself” or  “Stop showing off .” Most cultures appreciate graciousness and humility, especially when it comes to one’s own achievements. 

Yes,  self confidence is wonderful and it is essential to have a healthy dose of self esteem and confidence  for what you have done, what you are currently doing, and what you plan to do. But Keep it to yourself  or only share it with your intimates and very close circle of friends and family. Let people know your achievements but do it humbly.

No one likes a continuous braggart or someone who exaggerates for effect, or  who is big headed. It alienates  most people and it is off- putting. That is how many physicians who tend to be too full of themselves often end up in trouble with patients and in legal disputes.

Now that he is the President, he needs to keep it less personal and strictly focus on and discuss the issues just as passionately as he talks about himself.  He needs to speak less about himself and more about us and how the issues affect us.


 Donald Trump’s recent presser focused on setting the record straight and  admonishing the “fake news” and  many less than professional journalists. In my view his speech was correct and what he said finally  needed to be said. Had I not personally  experienced  what he is talking about – the spin and negativity, I would have never believed what Trump was saying. But he is absolutely correct in this regard. 



I have been doing countless interviews about the Trump/ Abe handshake all over the world and have been setting the record straight that there was no problem between Trump and Japanese Prime Minister Abe. In fact their body language each showed that they really liked one another.  This was indicated by their body language. Trump did the double handshake which shows genuine affection and Abe leaned into Trump and his toes pointed in Trump’s direction, indicating he really liked Trump. He also showed a genuine smile with his apples of his cheeks raised, eyes squinted, and teeth showing. 

No one overpowered anyone. As they were equally formidable in their approach. In fact Abe directed the photo op as she told Trump “look at me” which Trump immediately did. They maintained. eye to eye contact as they both  had a strong handshake. In fact Trump remarked that Abe had a strong handshake.  

When the photo op was finally over and they both broke their strong handshake, Ave looked up ( as though he was searching for someone) and immediately an aide ( in glasses) came over to him. He did NOT roll his eyes at Trump. Japanese people do not do that when they are exasperated or when they are not happy about someone. So the take that journalists had on this was wrong. Many called me to verify that the relationship between Trump and Abe was bad. i told them that is was not and set the record straight. Most journalists were great and reported my take and saw my point of view.

But there were others who simply would have none of it.I found that distressing. When the election was taking place Quartz, a new publication which is an offshoot of the Atlantic Monthly paid me to write a story on Trump and Pence’s handshake and body language which I gladly did.

Several days ago, I got an urgent email from one of Quartz’s writers Selian Cheng who wanted to know my take on the Trump. Abe handshake.  The article involved no pay as it was just my opinion. I got back to her immediately with the view I described above. Then  never heard back from her. Finally,  she emailed me to let me now she found someone else and wanted to use other body language expert to get their different view.

I then emailed her back and asked why she even bothered to contact me in the first place if that was her aim all along  as it wasted her time and mine. After reading the article in Quartz which she wrote, it appeared to me in my view  that my quote didn’t apparently match her spin of the story which was very anti-Trump and mischaracterized the whole handshake situation,. So she simply got another body language “expert” ( and I use that term loosely)  who’s views may have  matched her agenda in my view. It saddened me as that is not how I learned to do journalism as a journalism student at the best journalism school in the country, USC.  

I felt bad about this so I wanted to share my thoughts with the Editor in Chief of Quartz. Unfortunately I didn’t get the chance because his Editorial Assistant Molly Rubin, with whom I shared why I was calling, in  what I perceived as a nasty tone, said “thank you very much” and hung up on me. So there you have it!  Obviously she didn’t want to hear what I had to say on the matter and with the Toxic behavior she showed me, I doubt anyone got my message or concern.



Donald Trump is a man who is very demonstrative and effusive in terms of his affection. He even kissed Pence when Pence was  nominated as Vice President.

 Many are not used to it, so they are taken aback and they are making a huge deal out of his  kissing, handshakes and effusive greetings.

 But I can assure you the way he meets and greets is part of the norm in Hollywood and Trump is very Hollywood when it comes to his greetings. People tend to be more   open, affectionate and effusive in show business than they are in other businesses. So we tend to be used to this.

Personally, I find it refreshing. If you really like someone , you let it be known. That is what Trump did with Abe, Pence, Trudeau and others he likes. With Trudeau, they not only shook hands, they both embraced shoulders which is an even bigger display of mutual affection. It is NOT by any means a power play when it is mutual. It showed they were on equal footing in terms of their affection towards one another. 


Trump doesn’t hide his positive emotions and I say he should continue to do what he is going in terms of being genuine  in his meet and greets, which have received world- wide attention.

Screen Shot 2017-02-18 at 7.10.13 PM.png

Apparently many world leaders who are planning to meet President Trump in the future are concerned with how to approach the newly elected President when they meet him. “How can the leader best shake his hand”  was the question a Chinese journalist  from China’s major newspaper asked me in regard to Chinese President Xi’s upcoming visit to the United States.

 I let her know that the best way to approach Trump in terms of his hand-shaking is to mirror him. If he does the double handshake with his hand on top of Xi’s, then Xi, also needs to do the same . This will indicate mutual warmth and affection and will not be read as Trump taking charge or overpowering. I also suggested that Xi match Trump’s strength and firmness in terms of his handshake.

 I also suggested that Xi not bold back and be genuine in his feelings, because Trump certainly will hold nothing back.  I assured the Chinese journalist  during our interview that the body doesn’t lie no matter how hard you may try to control it. The truth always leaks out. 




Jodi Arias Smiles, Flirts, and Kisses and Laughs In Recent Courtoom Appearance

ImageJodi Arias  first arrived in the courtroom wearing a very sullen expression. She was not wearing her glasses which were  previously her apparent prop which she used to try and sway the jury that she was just an average abuse vicitim and not a femme fatale. Her eyes looked a bit sunken and her complexion was pale.

She was expressionless as she sat down. But then she turned  to the back of the courtroom  to look at who was in the  audience. She clearly recognized someone who made her smile . She even  puckered up and gave the person a kiss.


First we see her pursing her lips as she strains to locate the person as she eyes those seated in back of her in the courtroom.


Then she recognizes  the person and makes eye contact  with them and proceeds to exhibit a genuine smile with her cheeks raised, teeth showing,  and eyes squinted. This indicates she is really happy to see the person.


She knows she shouldn’t be doing what she is doing . Hence you see her pursing her lips as she tries to surpress her excitement and happiness at seeing the person. But her eyes continue to smile. 


She continues to look at the person as she unpurses her lips. Says OK .


 Now we see her puckering up in a kissing motion. 






She  then turns away and laughs to herself as she is quite self satisfied in terms of what she has done in giving an air  kiss to someone in the back of the  courtroom. 


She continues to smile  a genuine smile as she turns away from the person. You can see her raised cheeks and squinted eyes which indicates she is very happy with herself.

The question is with whom was Jodi  flirting? Was it one of her male or female admirers? Was it her one loyal male friend who has supported and defended her ? Was it her female friend who has tweeted  on her behalf? Was it someone new? I doubt that it was her mother or father based on her strained relationship with them in the past.  

Jodi is  most likely receiving support if not love letters from disturbed thinking fans out there. Perhaps the person to whom she was smiling and flirting with and to whom she gave an air kiss to was one of those  disturbed suitors.

While Jodi was happy that she was able to get some personal attention in the courtroom, this may be one of the last times she gets away with it. When she is locked up in prison for life or on death row, there will be nothing to smile  about and no one to share a laugh. 




Casey Finds It Hard to Look At George While On The Stand And He Denies Sexually Molesting Casey

When George was on the stand, Casey  could barely look at him.  We  see her leak out anger towards her father when he is on the stand. Note the angry jaw jutted forward and tightness around her mouth area.

George discussed how he was in the delivery  room when Caylee was born which to me speaks of a lack of boundaries within the family structure.  Personally  I think it is inappropriate  and way too intimate an experience for a father to be in the delivery room.  Even George knew it was in appropriate. That is why he made sure to say that there are  some  things you you  don’t want to see that are embarrassing 

 George  was uncomfortable when  had to discuss how there were several possibilities of who could have been Caylee’s biological  father. He spoke about it so nonchalantly as though it did not matter which many would find and odd response.

This photo above appears to be very significant to me. When George said that having your daughter and granddaughter around was like a 20 on a scale of one to ten, Casey’s face literally dropped. She could no longer look at her father after her team’s attempt to throw him under the bus.

 She hears  that he did love both her and Caylee. She feels so uncomfortable that she  looks away in detachment. Maybe she looks away because she doesn’t believe his words. Maybe she believes he loved Caylee and not her and that he was a detached father, which we learn he is through his testimony.

Casey kept looking away from George continually.

He had no clue who the father was and even didn’t’ ask  if she was pregnant  when he found out.  It clearly   shows how uninvolved he was . He reportedly only  asked prior to delivery as to  who the father was as opposed to asking when he immediately  found out Casey  was pregnant when he was told by Cindy and Casey. That is very odd. It shows how disconnected and detached he was in Casey’s life.

Dr. Lillian Glass Ten Top New Years Wishes for Newsmakers in 2011


 Stop trying to spin the press because the public can see right through it. Know that they are not stupid!  Be open and honest and tell it like it is. Never do what you did last on the Today Show when you spoke  about your expelled children.

You will be more respected if you come clean whether it is about your relationship with your “bodyguard” to  your troubled kids. Also stop blaming Jon for your troubles and stop trashing him on TV because it only hurts the kids and will come back to haunt then in the future.

You mentioned that the children who are being home schooled are  now seeing a therapist for their behavioral issues. It may be in your best interest for the New Year to follow suit and also seek a therapist to help you deal with all of the inner anger that you leak out whenever you are on television.

Be grateful for what you have and give  back. Instead of giving the  kids used toys and clothing to  a consignment shop so you can earn more money, give it to an orphanage or to a place where children who have nothing- who are homeless or abused can benefit.


2. Rachel Uchitel

Stay out of the media. No one cares that you are a love addict (which by the way, we all are). No one cares that you are  becoming a private investigator and  can now  use your   “ sneaking around skills”  you used  when you cheated with   married men  in a more acceptable  way as a private investigator. Hiring a private investigator is hiring a person one can trust. Do you actually think   anyone can fully trust a woman who cheated and snuck around with several high profile married men ?

 And Rachel if someone calls you a whore or a hooker stop threatening to sue them because you would have a hard time  defending your position in a court of law, especially after so many perceive you as shaking down Tiger Woods for millions of dollars in exchange for your silence about your sex life with him. Some would consider that a rather  whorey or hookery thing to do. So lay low and enjoy your Allred induced millions that Tiger once earned for his golfing abilities.


3. Michael Lohan

Go to acting classes to get a legitimate theatrical education. Then try out for local theatre to get your acting chops. Get some guest shots on a TV series to further hone in your acting skills or even a gig on a soap for a while. With all your business enterprising skills, begin raising money for a film project showcasing yourself. Maybe then you won’t have to ride on the coat tails of Lindsay and you can have your very own legitimate acting career.

 Maybe then you can stop showing up in the press and embarrassing yourself and everyone else you have secretly tape recorded to blackmail them. Stop being Lindsay’s mouth piece so you can show up in the press.

 And stop trashing your enabling ex wife Dina. We all get it! We get that she is a large part of Lindsay’s problems. For the new year be a part of Lindsay’s solutions and not her problems. That means stay out of the press unless it involves you and your acting career, not hers. 


4. Nadya Suleman- “Octomom”

Stop showing up in  the press to beg for money or to garner sympathy whenever you can’t pay your rent. It is your responsibility, so you will have to manage it.

 Since you don’t want to do a reality show or any nudity  figure out a way to raise money to properly house you kids. Maybe you really do want to do nudity. After all why would you show up in so many photo ops with your breasts half exposed as we see int he photo above. Why not get paid for photos like you already do for free? Maybe for the new year you may want to reconsider   Mr. Vivid’s offers. 

You need to do whatever it takes to make sure those kids are well cared for in every way no matter what sacrifices you have to make along the way. Come up with a plan or a series of plans and follow through with them.

5. Mel Gibson

Spend a month with Rabbi Marvin Hier at the Museum of Tolerance. He will  cure your anti-Semitism and educate you about the Holocaust so you won’t continue to show your ignorance about the topic . You should also go on a field trip with him and with actual Holocaust survivors to Auschwitz so you can see  and hear first hand the atrocities of hate and how innocent people suffered for nothing other than what you have spewed for- hatred towards them.

 Next you should spend another month living in the inner city so you see that Black people are people and not animals as you have referred to them in calling them “packs of n word”  You can see firsthand how the kids desperately need  after school centers and sports programs and cultural programs. Perhaps with all you money you can fund programs for them in every inner city in the US. You need to spend another month with Rev. Jesse Jackson who is one of the pioneers in the Equal Rights Movement. He will educate you about what it took throughout history for  Blacks  to be where they are today. He will share personal painful moments with you and  tragic moments in history where hatred like yours caused what happened to innocent young Black man Emmit Till. He will show you before and after photos of this innocent young man who was pummeled beyond recognition by those who spoke the same hateful words as you about Blacks.

 Then you need to spend some time in every Latino community in the US  so you can see  how wonderful dedicated hardworking Latinos earn money, often  working  several jobs so they can feed and clothe their families.

 And then you need to read my book Toxic Men- 10 Ways to Identify, Deal With, and Heal From Men Who Make Your Life Miserable . Read it from cover to cover.

  Spend the rest of the year visiting Abuse Shelters and hearing stories from the mouths of  the women who have been tortured and brutalized. Perhaps then will you have more respect for women as you can now  put more of your money into Abuse Shelters in every city in this country.  This is my wish for you Mel so that your daughter Lucia can be spared the hatred and ugly prejudice that comes from you and so that your ugliness will not be passed down to her.    

 6. To MTV re  Teen Moms- 



 MTV Stop showcasing and  making these troubled girls into celebrities and putting them on the covers of magazines to pop your ratings. It gives the wrong message- get pregnant as a teen, get on an MTV reality show , be on the  magazine covers and be a star.

You may have had the right idea to show teens the problems of teen pregnancy but your show will have either no impact or the opposite effect. \

And by the way, when you saw the teen mom Amber  beating on her baby daddy and the child Leah was allegedly in the house, why did you not intervene?  So what if it made good TV. It ended up destroying several people’s lives.

 My wish for you in the new year is to take this show of the air and show great teens doing great things with their lives which will inspire other teens. And please be more responsible!


7.  George and Cindy Anthony- Casey Anthony’s Parents

 I hope that truth and justice prevails as Casey gets a fair trial so that we can finally put this tragic case to rest.

And no matter what the outcome I hope that her Toxic Parents, Cindy and George stay out of the limelight and not  try to make money and profit over the death of their granddaughter or their daughter.

 Cindy needs to go back to nursing and George can be a security officer  or become a salesman. He has had a lot of practice trying to sell us a bill of goods  about  Casey.

The two of them need to be responsible and  pay their mortgage and  focus on their son Lee  and  dote on his offspring.

8.  Lindsay Lohan 

I pray that you work your program and stay off drugs  and alcohol. I also hope that you get a great therapist to work out your mom and dad issues and that you get a new manager not a momanager who wants to share the limelight with you and who does not appear to have your best interests at heart. If she did have your best interests at heart,  she would not have enabled you and lied about you on television interviews all these years.

While you were a cute child actress and had talent, the jury is still out as to how you will do as an adult actress and how you will be received at the box office.  You have wasted lot a lot of time and momentum when it comes to your acting career, so you  have a lot of catching up to do.

 Unfortunately the window for female actors is short, unlike it is for male actors like Robert Downey who was in a similiar situation as yourself years ago.

 You spent a great deal of that window not acting and gaining a fan base who would have been  impressed with your acting abilities and who would have rushed to theatres to see your next film. So  I suggest you study with an acting coach to hone your skills so when you do make a comeback you will have a better chance of succeeding for the short time your career will last.

My Favorite Performers

9. To Armie Hammer ( who played the Winkelvoss Twins in Social Network ) Matt  Damon,  Josh Duhmel. Paul Rudd,  Vince Vaughn, Jason Siegel, Leonard DiCaprio,  Reese Witherspoon, Richard Dean Morgan, Mark Walhberg, Eric Dane, Catherine Heigel, Brad  Pitt,and Angelina Jolie

  Since you all my  most favorite performers and since I love watching you so much, keep making  lots of movies in 2011.

10 Snooki

Keep growing and evolving as you have been doing. Also  keep referring to my book which you read Toxic Men . By your choosing the right guy in your life, who will treat you with the love and respect you deserve, you will inspire millions of other young ladies  who are your devoted fans to do the same.


Paris Hilton’s Body Language in Her Latest Mugshot Shows Smug Smile, Confident All Will Turn Out In Her Favor


Paris Hilton who was recently arrested for cocaine possession is no stranger to arrests and  mug shots. But unlike her previous mug shots, this time she did a  her ¾ model like turn to the camera, tilted her head and gave a slight Mon-Lisa like closed lipped smile.

The smile spoke volumes. It wasn’t an overly happy excited smile with raised cheekbones. Instead it was a knowing smile. It was a smile that indicated all will work out for her in her favor  and that she really didn’t have a care in the world. It said “ nothing will happen to me and I will get away with this just like I got away with my arrest this summer at the World Cup Match in South Africa in suspicion of marijuana.”   


 How couldn’t it world out well for her? After all there was more publicity to keep her relevant and on the front pages of the news. Paris’  facial expression indicated that she did not have a care in the world. It showed confidence the confidence of having a  a high priced powerful and connected attorney  who will very likely be able to get her off of this charge of cocaine possession  on some sort of  a technicality.

 Unlike the average Joe who is caught with cocaine, unfortunately Paris gets  to thumbs her nose up against the system and most likely  walk away.

  Apparently in Wynn security cameras filmed the Vegas police searching her handbag and putting her under arrest inside the security office of the Wynn Hotel in after arrested with her latest boyfriend Cy Waits after being pulled over by cops who smelled marijuana. 

 Instead of being arrested right away, Paris was taken into the Wynn’s security office where — as the Las Vegas Metro police put it — “it was discovered that Ms. Hilton had cocaine in her possession.”  Then was she arrested.

Paris lawyer Vegas attorney David Chesnoff believes her  arrest captured on tape, could help her tremendously as he will claim it was an illegal search, in part because she was taken away from the scene to this other location. Chesnoff will also be able to take apart every single thing that happened during the search and arrest because he’ll have the video to work off of. 

So now there is a side show instead of the real issue of Paris having illegal drugs on her. Paris’ repeatedly claimed while she was being detained that the purse wasn’t hers.  While the purse may not have been hers, was the cocaine hers? Perhaps a fingerprint analysis could determine that.    



Paris’ latest beau Cy Waits was also arrested , But he was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence of drugs and alcohol where he could get up to a year in county jail.

But Waits’ also has a high powered attorney. His attorney  said “”As the case proceeds, a lot of facts are going to come to light that will ultimately lead to exoneration.”

 Let’s hope not. Let’s hope that justice is served and the message is sent out loud and clear that those who use and are caught with illegal drugs of any kind will have to suffer the consequences no matter how much money or fame they have.  


 As you well know from reading my blogs I am disturbed by young women who are in the limelight like Paris who exhibit bad heavier and are subsequently rewarded  for their  bad behavior with millions of dollars, television shows etc. I do not like the  message this give to our young women.

Young people need to know loudly and clearly that no matter who a person is or how much money they have, if they do something wrong they will be held accountable. They need to know that they  can not  get away with things. They need to be fully aware of the fact that they will not receive rewards for bad  behavior or illegal actions.They need to know that Paris Hilton cannot be an exception to the rule. They need to see that she is treated as anyone else who breaks the law.


 After Paris  spent only half of her 45 day sentence in a Los Angeles jail three years ago, she appeared on Larry King Live when she was released. On the show,  she said her jail experience caused her to re-evaluate the role partying played in her life.

Perhaps she needs  yet another jail sentence to help her further re-evaluate her priorities. Let’s hope that our young people don’t continue to get the message that  all is not equal when doing the  wrong thing and that there there is a different set of rules for the rich and famous. www.drlillianglass.com

Misty Croslin’s Body Language Says She’s Not Doing Well Behind Bars As The Shock of Reality Sets In

Misty Croslin recently made a shocking revelation. She told investigators her cousin Joe Overstreet put little Haleigh  in a black bag and left with  her. She said that she heard Haleigh Cummings screaming and  being attacked before she vanished, She also revealed that she was cowering beneath a blanket  with Haleigh’s baby brother.  If this is true then I believe she needs to get the harshest punishment for not relaying this information to authorities earlier.

As it is  now, Misty is not faring very well behind bars. At first she was terrified, crying, and whining all the time  that she wanted to get out. We witnessed her emotional outbursts  during her jailhouse tapes when she spoke at length  to her father and mother. Then we saw a  defensiveness  in  her jailhouse tapes where she blamed everyone for her being locked up including the officers who arrested her. Then there was belligerence where she old the media t o kiss her a**”

Now that she is off drugs and able to completely process the reality of her  situation, she has hardened.  Her eyes have a steely gaze to them. Her jaw is tight. She has a resigned swagger as she faced the judge and pleaded no contest. Her cocked head to the side indicates that she is not completely sure of  exactly what will happen to her. But she does know that the outcome of  whatever  does happen to her  as she stands in front of the judge won’t be a good one.

Gone is the slim pretty faced  long haired young  17 year old  whom we first met when Haleigh went missing.

Now  see a matronly overweight middle-aged looking woman with a hard cold stare and downturned lips. Even her hairstyle in a 1960’s flip is matronly. The physical transformation Misty has undergone is as shocking as her recent revelations about Haleigh.  Misty is unrecognisable from the Misty we  met two years ago.

Her obvious weight gain may be due to her getting off  drugs which may have previously kept her wirey and thin. Perhaps she has been given  medication  in jail which contributed to her weight gain. Perhaps the prison food, visits to the canteen,  lack of exercise. and   not moving around as much  has also made her chubby.

The stress of not being able to communicate honestly with anyone has also no doubt affected her. If what she recently  admitted to investigators is true, then this was a horrible burden for her to keep to herself. It no doubt must have haunted her and still does.

Then there is the stress of knowing that  not one, but both of her parents are now behind bars. Now there is no one to visit with her. There are no more long jail visits and conversations  with her papa or her mamma because they are in the same boat she is in.

Reality has set in that it will be a very long time before  she will be able to be with her family as she once knew it.

Finally, there is the stress of realizing that she is not going to get a light tap on the wrist. Instead,  she knows that she is going to spend the best years of her life behind bars.

 She won’t be able to come and go as she pleases. She won’t be running the show like she did with her parents and her friends.  She won’t be able to have a boyfriend or have  sex or even have kids.  She may have even realized that  by the time she does get out of prison she will be too old to start a family of her own.

 Misty’s recent revelations about what happened to Haleigh were obviously made public in the hope that she would get a lesser sentence. I hope that this is not the case. 

For all we know this may be another lie. Maybe she had something to do with Haleigh’s death. Maybe Ron himself had something to do with it.  Maybe she called on Cousin Joe and brother Tommy  to get rid of the body so she could make it look like a kidnapping.

I am still haunted by the 911 call. Something just doesn’t add up, especially with regards to Ron’s behavior.  To me, Misty’s behavior always revealed “tells”  that indicated she knew a lot more than she was saying.

If she did hurt Haleigh and kill her as Haleigh’s birth mother suspects, Misty should  never see the light of day.  On the other hand, if  what she is saying about cousin Joe is true , and  she didn’t  alert authorities until now, that is a good enough reason as far as I am concerned to never her see the light of day again. www.drlillianglass.com


Craigslist Killer Philip Markoff Finally Commits Suicide in Jail. Body Language Signals of Anti Social Behavior May Have Been Ignored By Ex Fiance Megan McCallister

It comes as no surprise to me that Craigslist Killer medical student Philip Markoff finally did himself in. According to reports he put  plastic bag over his head and smothered himself to death as well as cutting an artery so he would bleed to death.

When he was first arrested and put into custody, there were reports that he constantly picked at himself until he bled. In fact eyewitnesses stated that Markoff “started to pick at his ear” the day his Megan McAlister  fiance at time visited him in jail.

His self mutilating body language spoke volumes. But what about his body language signals when he was dating and engaged to Megan? did they speak volumes as well or did Megan ignore them?


Markoff’s  picking at himself until he bled  was a form of self mutilation. Because he was caught and  finally trapped , it was a body language tell that indicated that he was punishing himself  and displaying his  self  loathe for getting caught.

Markoff was so arrogant and thought he was so brilliant and clever at figuring  out his  brilliant plan to make an easy buck. He answered Craigslist ads placed by those engaged in offering sexual messages or services and robbed them. He was sure they wouldn’t protest or report him. After all, they were doing something illegal as well and didn’t want to get themselves in trouble by reporting illegal acts they were committing.

But when  they protested, he killed them like he did with 26 yer old Julissa Brisman. Police found lots of evidence-panties he collected from  his apartment from his victims along with  plastic handcuffs, and a hollowed out Grey’s Anatomy book containing a gun- his murder weapon.

So when he  was caught, he was bright enough to know that there was absolutely no way out. His self mutilation and self punishment reflects his  anger at himself for not being so brilliant and for getting caught.  This lead to his ultimate self punishment of killing himself.  Because he was devoid of emotion as most psychopaths are, his emotional distress was revealed in his body picking.

He knew what lay ahead of him. So he took the easy way out and saved the state time and money and did the job himself. So now there is one less Toxic Man among us.


One of the significant body language tells that can be observed with Markoff can be seen when he was in the courtroom. He showed absolutely no emotion. His face was stoic and he barely moved .

Emotionally, through his facial expressions and body language , he showed a lack of remorse and a lack of guilt. This is very indicative of those with antisocial personality disorders. There was also no question that he was in shock when first capture , much like another very tall, intelligent  and  handsome fellow who allegedly killed several young women- Joran van der Sloot.

What these two miscreants have in common is that they were so arrogant and full of themselves and thought so highly of their own intelligence that they never thought they would ever get caught. So when they did get caught they were in complete physical  shock. This dramatically showed in their body and facial language.


What was most chilling to discover was how security cameras showed Markoff  casually strolling to and from  the three different crime scenes as he used his Blackberry. He showed the same psychopathic casualness that Joran van der Sloot showed in his body language. when he calmly walked out of the hotel room carrying his bags, while he left a mutilated dead woman inside his hotel room.

It seems that their demeanor isn’t the only thing these two had in common.  They both robbed  killed women for money to help support their gambling debts and habits. They had no sympathy or remorse for their victims and were able to continue on in their lives  as though nothing happened.


There is no doubt that Markoff thought about killing himself the whole time he was incarcerated. But he chose to commit the act on  the date of  his would be first wedding anniversary. To me this is clear a shout out to Megan, a beautiful young  and intelligent woman, who also wanted to become a doctor herself, who  had no clue about him or the double life he was leading.

Perhaps his suicide on the date of their failed wedding was a sick and depraved message to   Megan  in order to  one last time create pain and emotional  havoc in someone’s life.

It was clear from her statements to the press and statements, through her attorney, which were  made  after Markoff was arrested,  Megan had no idea who her fiancé was or what he was doing in his spare time- robbing and killing. She wrote in her email to the press:

Unfortunately you were given wrong information as was the public. All I have to say to you is Philip is a beautiful person inside and out and could not hurt a fly! A police officer in Boston (or many) is trying to make big bucks by selling this false story to the TV stations. What else is new?? Philip is an intelligent man who is just trying to live his life so if you could leave us alone we would greatly appreciate it. We expect to marry in August and share a wonderful, mean‘I will stand by Philip as I know he is innocent.

And in a message to a reporter on a social networking site she said the following :
‘Philip is a beautiful man inside and out. ‘He is intelligent, loyal, and the best fiance a woman could ask for. He would not hurt a fly!’

But were her words true? Did she really believe her words? The answer is probably.  Perhaps  he only showed her his good side.  On the other hand, perhaps there were signals all along  but Megan may have been  too blinded by a  planning  a lavish wedding and a future with a bright doctor.  The question is were there signs early on that could have clued Megan in to the fact that her fiancé was living a double life?  The answer is YES!


As any forensic psychiatrist  will tell you, once you decide to burrow  deep beneath the surface you will discover that this aberrant  behavior did not happen over night. They were there when he was a child. The fact that he refused to make eye contact with his parents when they sat in the courtroom also seems to speak volumes. They no doubt knew early on that something was off with their son which they may have chosen to ignore.

Perhaps they felt that now that he was going to get married he would  finally straighten out. But they were wrong. When he told his parent to forget about him after they visited him in jail, it said it all.

There may have  also been symptoms of Philip Markoff’s  psychopathy that were evident that Megan McAllister also  ignored or refused to see.

One of the most telling things in psychopathic behavior is the emotional detachment. You can actually see it in their engagement photo. While he is smiling with Megan, she is the one lovingly nuzzling into him. He on the other hand  has a mask-like  smile and doesn’t embrace her arm. Instead he awkwardly positions the front of his hand against her elbow.  He doesn’t lean into her or embrace her. Granted  this is only one photo.

But when we examine another photo of the two of them in a more casual setting,  we see the same pattern. She is nuzzling  and leaning into him and he is so detached,  he even has one of his hands behind his back as though he has something to hide-  his secret  life. Again you do not see him embracing her or showing signals of affection towards her.

Megan may have rationalized that Philip  wasn’t the affectionate type or didn’t like public displays of affection. But when two people are about to marry, there should be a lot of  mutual displays of affection. But were there other signs?

1, Did he lack sensitivity?

2. Was he cunning and manipulative?

3.  Did he show a lack of remorse or guilt?

4, Did she catch him in lies?

5. Dis she think he was callous and lacked sympathy?

6.  Did she notice that he was full of himself all the time with a grandiose sense of self worth?

7, Dis she notice a glibness and a superficial charm?

8. Did he always seem to blame others and not accept responsibility for his  actions?

9. Did he seem to have a shallow ?

In retrospect, I have no doubt that Megan could answer YES to many or all of these questions.

These are the signs of someone who exhibits psychopathic or sociopathic behavior. In fact I discuss this is greater detail in my new book which will be coming out in November  2010 called TOXIC MEN- 10 Ways to Identify, Deal With and Heal From men Who make Your Life Miserable which you may pre order by clicking here http://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Men-Ways-Identify-Miserable/dp/144050007X

If Megan chose to ignore these red flags, it is understandable. After  all, they met doing something that was selfless and good for the sake of others. They were both hospital volunteers when they were in college. So she saw Markoff  as a good person who does good for others. The fact that he was in medical school and intent on becoming a doctor confirmed to her that he was a good persona nd out to help others.

She thought he guy from a good family, seeing that  his father was a respected dentist.  As a doctor, they had wouldn’t have financial worries.  They were planning a big wedding and she was ready to start her life with him.

So after he was picked up on I 95 while they were in the car together, police  separated them  in two police cars where Philip was taken into custody and Megan was released. It is understandable why she vehemently proclaimed that there must have been some mistake.

But Megan’s story teaches us a great deal. We must be vigilant. We must look for these red flag signals and never ignore them or hope they go away or change. They cannot  change.

We cannot be blinded by what we want to see and not what is actually there or not there. Based on Markoff’s body language towards Megan in the above photos  what was not there was a lot of  open affection. That may have been indicative of his inability to have anything other than a detached emotional interaction with another person. It may have been the first red flag of  psychopathic behavior.   www.drlillianglass.com