While ESPN’s Britt McHenry Shows Toxic Behavior By Fat, Dental, Job, and Education Shaming, Tow Worker is Toxic for Releasing Tape

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Yes  ESPN’s Britt McHenry clearly showed what a Toxic  entitled character she had by verbally  hitting  the tow company worker below the belt as she fat shamed, dental shamed, job shamed, and education shamed the woman who no doubt,  did something to aggravate Britt.  Since nothing happens in a vacuum,  there is no doubt  in my mind that the tow worker  did  something that made Britt go off on her.Maybe she was robotic, insensitive to Britt’s  plight, cold, uncaring, had an attitude, or maybe she said something provocative that ticked off Britt.

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But by warning  Britt that she was on tape and stating she would show it, it demonstrates  how passive aggressive the tow worker was acting. By actually releasing the tape publically to get back at  Britt and now turning the tables and   shaming  Britt, it shows how Toxic  and vindictive  the tow worker  really  is.

This was a petty situation between two women. No ones life was at stake.

As soon as Britt realized she was on tape she put her hand up to her throat indicating that she was suddenly feeling vulnerable. Her large eyed look whereby you can see the whites or sclera shows her surprise and shock. No doubt when the tow worker threatened that she would show it, it frightened Brit as revealed through her body language.

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The tow worker  needed to speak up  immediately and tell the  reporter she was going too far and not not speak to her this way.She needed to tell the reporter she wouldn’t help her if she continued to speak to her like that and that she would get another employee to help her. Then he needed to get that employee to help Britt calm down and finish her business. Obviously the tow driver was too wraped up in her own feelings  instead of calming her customer down with soothing words and trying to diffuse the situation. She needed to say how it was hitting below the belt and how she  was hurting her feelings.

But the tow worker said nothing as we heard on tape. She merely displayed her  vindictiveness  at being fat shamed, education shamed, and teeth shamed by getting  back at the sportscaster by publicly releasing the tape and shaming her. If there was a nurse or a doctor  or dentist who did something to jeopardize your health, one should  out them to help protect the public and warn them about that person’s dangerous and toxic  behaviors.  After all that is what Yelp  and Health Grades is all about. But to out  a customer for a petty attitude issue is a whole different issue.

The tow worker could have also spoken up on the tape and said look, don’t speak to me that way or I won’t help you and I will get someone else to assist you if you treat me that way, or you really hurt my feelings by what you are saying. It needed to be dealt with between the two women. But she got the public involved and in my view she is just as Toxic as the reporter if not more. The reporter’s behavior is  unfortunately often what is seen in the showbusiness world- entitlement and thinking they are such a big star and talking down to others.  I have seen it countless times in Hollywood. Not all celebrities are like that but the newer ones who haven’t yet hit hard times and think that they are all that and believe their press often pull this behavior.

Since  Britt flaunted her TV career, the tow worker could have sent the tape  to the authorities at ESPN to show her action instead of showing it to the world and helping to destroy the women’s career.  Perhaps the ESPN authorities would have given her a reality check and put her on the right path in terms of how to behave with others now that she is  a public figure.

I really think it needed to be handled by both women as grown adults  and  the incident should not have  involve a third party.

There are definitely times where  Toxic people in the service business need to be called out when they exhibit Toxic behavior.  if someone is belittling, being condescending, being hateful, or harming you always need to let them know how their actions won’t be tolerated and  you need to hold them accountable.

But if  you  decide to go off on them verbally, which can often happen, there are certain rules you MUST follow.

1. You cannot berate their physical looks.

2. You cannot berate  their job and whether you think it is beneath you.

3. You cannot say how superior you are to them or how much more educated you are then they are.

4. You cannot  fat shame them and name call.

5. You cannot teeth shame them. But if they have such bad breath and unkempt teeth that makes you feel like to vomit, you can gingerly suggest they monitor their bad breath or use oral hygeine, especially if they are dealing with the public   if  their offensive smell has invaded your  air space via your nostrils you have the right to let them know about it.

6, You cannot shame their dress  or style unless they are disheveled and dirty and serving you food or touching your body, your hair or your children (waiter, waitress, facialist, hair stylist,  nurse, health care worker, child care worker).

So when ESPN reporter did all of the above, she showed who she was- a very toxic person who thought she was all that  simply because  she was on TV and no doubt probably being told her entire live how cute she looked). Well she certainly lost a lot of points in the cuteness department, because cute is as cute does .

While she was suspended it remains to be seen whether or not she will be fired. That all depends on how  the audience will tolerate her. Since the ESPN audience is mostly made up of men and since a lot of men out there can overlook Toxic behavior in a woman as long as she is cute and has a nice body and appeals to them as eye candy, she may still keep her job.

But as far as rising up the ranks and becoming a bonafide respected news reporter, she can forget it. Look at what happened to lying  Brian Williams. In my view she needs to be fired stat. There are too many other  cute young women out there who aren’t as Toxic who could do the job. Shaming others is a huge no no and makes you unlikeable. As a reporter who wants a long career, you need to be likeable.

Mainstream audiences  of both men and women may never be  forget how highly she regards herself at the expense of others. She showed a lot of insensitivity and went below the belt when she tore the woman’s looks  and who she was, to shreds.

Britt is NOT as educated as she thinks she is. Graduating from Northwestern or getting an advanced degree means nothing if you don’t have the education of how to respectfully kmy treat others. You will never advance and you will lose if you act like a superior entitled brat.  Personally, I think her getting fired would be the best thing to happen to this young lady as it would humble her and give her a reality check. She needs a complete inner makeover of her soul so she acquires more compassion, less entitlement, and less feelings of superiority to others.

In addition,  the tow worker should be fired for releasing the tape and being just as  or even more toxic by her sneaky passive aggressive behavior. The tow worker is not rthe victim here and should not be portrayed as one. She had a huge role in this debacle as well.

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22 thoughts on “While ESPN’s Britt McHenry Shows Toxic Behavior By Fat, Dental, Job, and Education Shaming, Tow Worker is Toxic for Releasing Tape

  1. You use the word “shaming”. When did “bullying” suddenly become the term “shaming”? Is that now the politically correct term? I personally believe that this young reporter needs to take her lumps. She was warned she was on tape and continued her “bullying”. Any person with a bit of common sense would have closed their mouth right then and there. Which leads me to believe that the young woman has a history of doing this since she couldn’t stop herself. Would I have released it publicly had it been me? Maybe not but I don’t consider the tow company worker “toxic”. Yes, she got revenge on her tormentor because I would bet my last dollar Ms. McHenry’s employer wouldn’t have done much beyond “Hey don’t do that again.” At I’m even more certain they wouldn’t have replied to the tow company worker. It wasn’t the right thing to release the tape publicly, but it got more action than trying to go through the right channels. With social media these days, we all need to be aware that we could have our actions viewed by any number of people at any time. Having said all that, I will freely admit there have been 3 times in my life that I went on a tirade and the person on the other end of the phone took the brunt of it. I was more than wrong although I never personally attacked their appearance/intelligence/etc. in any manner but I did berate them for not understanding my side of the situations I was trying to resolve. In 2 cases, I realized how rude and nasty I was being and calmed myself down and apologized for my COMPLETELY inappropriate behavior. Major kudos to those people for accepting the apologies for my temper tantrums. The 3rd case I actually phoned back to apologize since I had hung up. In each case, I was frustrated but I should NEVER have taken it out on the people I spoke to. My behavior was terrible but after apologizing (sincerely), I felt 100% better and the professionals that they were, they helped resolve my problems. Sometimes I think we all need to be taught a lesson and some lessons are harder than others. Ms. McHenry got the lesson of a lifetime and if she sincerely wants to change her ways, my money says she could become one heck of a professional that people could look up to. But her first step is to make a real apology. And perhaps this “toxic” situation was a door closing and a window opening…

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    1. Bullying is shaming. Shaming is specific- making one ashamed of their weight, teeth etc. The toe company woman was Toxic by being vindictive. She didn’t need to go public, BOTH women needed to handle this like grown adults.

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  2. You wrote: “…there is no doubt in my mind that the tow worker did something that made Britt go off on her. ”
    I’m glad there is no doubt in YOUR mind, but there is plenty in mine. We’ll never really know, but as someone who works in customer service, I can tell you that to someone who is aggravated about having to pay for a service in the first place (whether or not that service is something they asked for or was infringed upon them) the cashier herself had very little option but to do her job, which was to collect the fees for the service rendered. She is certainly not paid enough to take verbal abuse and her warning to Britt (large, doe-eyes, throat-clutching nervousness aside) did not stop Britt from continuing her tirade or from giving the finger when she finally left. KNOWING at that point, that she was being filmed. This behavior shows how little she cared about her behavior being on film (large doe-eyes, throat-clutching nervousness aside).
    “…the tow worker should be fired for releasing the tape and being just as or even more toxic by her sneaky passive aggressive behavior.”
    I could not disagree more strongly. Cameras are not hidden in places where large amounts of cash are exchanged on a daily basis, and her warning to Britt that she was going to release the tape – and then releasing the tape – is neither passive nor aggressive. It was a followed-through consequence of Britt’s unreasonable and outrageous behavior.
    “The tow worker is nortthe victim here and should not be portrayed as one. She had a huge role in this debacle as well.”
    A huge role? By being employed to perform a function that the customer did not want to participate in and being abused for it? WRONG. Your dismissal of her victim status is another way of giving entitled and nasty people like Britt permission to continue to be entitled and nasty. Good job.

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    1. NOTHING HAPPENS IN A VACUUM. It takes 2 to tango. So it is NOT in my mind but as part of human behavioral interaction. There was SOMETHING that happened that set Britt off- a look, an attitude, a tone, a word. If you are in customer service as you say you are then you need to know that when a client is upset you need to help diffuse the situation. As someone who has spent countless hours teaching customer service reps how to diffuse situations such as this I can assure you, she did something to help provoke the situation when she saw an already disturbed and upset customer. No matter what the tow worker is Toxic as well as she is vindictive and publicly and passive aggressively shamed Britt out of revenge. She had no right to release the tape. She is not law enforcement and could face litigation for doing so. Both are victims here so don’t play up the tow worker as being so innocent as she certainly had a hand in this matter.

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      1. Unless the full tape is released and the tow company worker’s comments are made as available as Ms. McHenry’s, we can’t know the exact situation. (You know what they say about assuming…) However, I don’t think you can say the worker set Ms. McHenry off. By her own (I think it was Twitter) account, she said her vehicle had been towed from the parking lot of the restaurant she was eating at. IF she was parked correctly and there was no reason for the vehicle to be towed, as she seems to state, then she was already upset and annoyed upon entering the tow company’s premises. (I think any of us would be!) I would assume (now I’m making assumptions!) that the tow company worker has heard it all before and this was just the same story, different person, different day. So, in a way you may be correct and possibly her indifference to Ms. McHenry’s situation irritated the young reporter. But she was simply doing her job. And I MIGHT even agree that the tow worker should be reprimanded for releasing the tape, and if she faces litigation for doing so, then that becomes her problem. But fired? No. She was doing her job. She’s not there to console Ms. McHenry nor is she there to be treated like a verbal punching bag. She takes the money and releases the vehicle. Had she wanted to escalate the situation, she could have stepped back and told Ms. McHenry to leave and come back when she could conduct herself in an acceptable manner. But to me, there is one very key point in all of this that I want to point out: the tow company worker warned Ms. McHenry that she was being videotaped. Ms. McHenry still didn’t seem to care and actually it was after that she got the most belligerent. Again, I can agree that it wasn’t right to release the tape publicly but the fact that it didn’t deter Ms. McHenry speaks volumes about the sense of entitlement people have in the current world. The tow worker just happened to drop that show of entitlement right smack into the middle of the court of public opinion.

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      2. I never said that the cashier was an “innocent” victim in this. I agree that it takes two to tango.
        Like with this conversation.
        You are making an assumption that “SOMETHING…set Britt off” and placing that SOMETHING directly in the lap of the cashier (“a look, an attitude…”)
        I am making an assumption that Britt came into the situation ALREADY set off.
        If you are going to make reasonable assumptions about Britt’s behavior, you should do the same with the cashier. Perhaps Britt was the 37th person in a row that took their anger out on someone whose job it is to take their money. Perhaps Britt came walking in with “a look, an attitude..”
        Why are you holding the cashier to a higher level of professionalism than a television personality?
        Like with this conversation.
        “If you are in customer service as you say you are then you need to know that when a client is upset you need to help diffuse the situation.”
        You are making assumptions about my ability to do my job…
        “As someone who has spent countless hours teaching customer service reps how to diffuse situations such as this…”
        And making it clear that you are in a much better position (based on your assumptions) to draw indisputable conclusions about this situation than someone in my position.
        I know how to perform my job. I am not here for career advice.
        And I am not here to have a toxic exchange. My opinion is that your assessment of this situation is unbalanced. How you choose to deal with that is on you.
        The cashier’s reasons behind releasing the video tape ARE steeped in toxicity, I agree. I just don’t see why you are providing reasonable assumptions that explain the behavior of one and not the other.
        Should either of them lose their jobs? No. Maybe they should both be encouraged to own up to their frail humanity, apologize to each other, and not have to read anymore articles about how horrible they are. We all have our moments – and sometimes we collide.
        There is no toxicity in forgiveness and understanding, while resentment and closed-mindedness are steeped in it.
        Have a good day.

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    2. I agree with you Diane that we do NOT know that anything said or done by the cashier set her off. I waited tables for many years and there are people who feel entitled from the word ‘go’ and treat you like dirt because you came to their table to help them. People who enjoy putting others down to make themselves feel superior and I know Lillian knows that, so I don’t understand why she would assume the cashier said or did something to aggravate the reporter. There are people like this reporter who don’t need anything to set them off when they are angry about a situation NOT of their target’s doing. I disagree with Lillian – yes, things do happen in a vacuum. People can be their own little storms wreaking havoc and deliberately intending to damage others who have done nothing to them. It happens. Also, some serious proofreading and editing is needed for these articles. See how this works? You did nothing to me, but I had to let you know that communications can benefit from proofreading. Spellcheck doesn’t count. 😀 I do it for a living and I still need a proofreader for my own work (like this comment, lol)

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      1. Things certainly do not happen in a vacuum. There is always a cause and effect of some sort. That is the law of nature.I do my best with thee blogs as I am dyslexic.And none of this matters as Britt is back on the job which proves my point that As long as she is pretty to look at, nothing else matters to ESPN. She now says she learned a lesson which I am sure is the case.But there is a silver lining as now people who never knew who she was will tune in just to see her. So ratings go up, she becomes popular, and everyone wins.

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      2. So, you’re saying that as a waitress when I come up to a table with a genuine smile and desire to help (I loved waitressing for a long time!) I somehow caused people to feel like they could freely comment about my crooked teeth, ask me if I’ve ever considered rhinoplasty, that I wore not enough makeup or too much makeup, my shoulder pads were too big, my hair wasn’t the right style for my face….seriously? And somehow that incredibly waitress on the other side of the restaurant who had nothing to do with a table not in her section, did something for two of those men to make a point to stop on their way out and say to her that she was beautiful until she opened her mouth? She had spaces between her teeth, and she was truly a beautiful girl inside and out. How did she deserve that? I agree with you that tone of voice, facial expressions and body attitude can absolutely affect how someone reacts to you, but for those people who have said or done nothing?

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  3. You are assuming a lot of things. That the worker who is merely a cashier for the towing company is calling all the shots and made the decision for the owners of the company to release the tape and get the public involved. That the cashier who reminded Ms. McHenry that she was on video did so merely out of vindictiveness. That you have no doubt that it was the cashier’s fault that caused McHenry to go off.

    Yes, in a perfect world between 2 adults the cashier should have spoken up and said the right words in response to McHenry’s ugly personal comments, but sometimes it is best to take the high road and say nothing at all rather than risk lowering yourself to the other person’s level and lash back. She may have been too shocked by McHenry’s hatefulness towards her that she couldn’t find words. Did you ever stop to think that as an employee of Advanced Towing that the cashier was following company policy? I have worked in security jobs before and the employer has strict policies in how to respond to certain situations as the public can be unpredictable. You don’t know if that person has a gun or what they are capable of. The very last thing the company wants their employee to do is to ESCALATE the situation. I don’t see how you can assign so much blame to the cashier when she said nothing on the tape and there is no way for anyone to read her body language.

    The cashier, Gina Michelle, is a single mother of three and probably makes minimum wage or close to it to provide for her children. She is not the head of the towing company making the decisions. She may have been so upset that day by McHenry’s hateful personal attack that she told her boss and they wanted to see the tape. When approached by reporters she was too distraught to comment.

    I don’t know anyone who likes going to a towing company to pay the fees to get their vehicle back. We all think they are exorbitant. I’m sure that as an employee of Advanced Towing that Ms. Michelle has dealt with her share of irate people (some who threaten physical abuse) and that’s probably why they have video camera there and she knew better than to say anything back – her bosses may have even told her not to say anything back in a situation like this but to remind the customer that they are on tape. It’s the nature of the business but that still doesn’t give McHenry a pass for her abusiveness. In all probability Michelle was just doing her job which Advanced Towing describes as a “difficult job”.

    If you gotta blame someone blame Advanced Towing who said Friday, “neither Gina, nor our company, have any interest in seeing Britt McHenry suspended or terminated as a result of her comments.”

    My guess is that Gina has no interest in seeing McHenry lose her job because she’s already distraught over the situation and the unwanted publicity and that Advanced Towing has no interest either because they figured the video itself is punishment enough.

    It would do well for celebrities, policemen, criminals and all people to be reminded that when in public your actions can be caught by that great equalizer – the video camera. They are everywhere.

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    1. Perhaps this is a lesson to everyone to SPEAK UP and not commit vindictive acts. What did the company expect when they released the tape. of course there would be repercussions concerning her job. Their intention was to shame her and they ended up costing Britt her job. Now Britt is no angel and should not have verbally hit the woman below the belt. But BOTH parties need to be held accountable for their actions.

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  4. I’ve worked several customer service positions and now that folks are so desperate for work, notice some employers do next to nothing to defend their employees against verbal abusers. My present always; right or wrong,always sides against employees. Always .we’re told we can always find another job if we don’t like it. Oh, and this is a right to work state where you can be fired for virtually any reason with little or no reason or recourse. So, I get taking justice in her hands, but it probably won’t help her get future employment. As for the reporter, it is troubling that she continued even after a warning, but as long as doesn’t have a personality disorder, she may get to a point of deep reflection and the humility to recognize how wrong that rant was. Then she can offer the tow truck woman a sincere apology.

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    1. Then and only then, will she become a better woman for all this and as a consequence, not the goal, be forgiven by the public and her peers and rise in her profession.

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    2. I was thinking along the same lines. Many companies discipline or fire service workers for speaking up, asking someone not to treat them that way. Under the “customer is always right” garbage, the worker must allow the customer to verbally abuse them. Also, defusing situations has gotten a lot more difficult in our current culture where so many do not hesitate to retaliate with gun fire.

      If you would read what customer service agents share online, you would find that many do not instigate anything. There are angry people out there looking to make someone else suffer.

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  5. But what you seem to be saying is that people like Britt should be able to bully others with no fear of retaliation. The victim should “rise above it” and keep quiet. Personally I think Britt completely deserved having her horrible personality exposed to the world. She will think twice before doing this to someone again and it will also make other people pause and think before doing it to others.

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  6. Lillian, I love how you do not let passive aggressive people get away with their antics! However, as a public speaker on TV I feel it is appropriate to show how some of these people act when they think no one is else is watching. Seeing how people treat other people when it is just 2 people is very insightful. Seeing how people treat people when it is more than 2 people is also insightful. And, then you have how people act as when they are robotically following social cues and norms and, for their own personal agenda, to not break laws. What I mean is that, people are not always how they appear. Evil lurks beneath the surface….man sees the outward appearance, God sees the heart. “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” And now we see that this pretty face is ugly and wicked on the inside. And boo hoo hoo ….all over getting her car towed!

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  7. The employee is not the person who released the video. The TOW COMPANY owned the video and made the decision to release it, according to an interview with a senior company person. Employees don’t own company videos.

    My opinion below:

    It’s not horrible that Britt said those words.

    It’s horrible that Britt actually THINKS those things about people privately, regardless of whether she says those words out loud.

    FACT: You can’t say things like that unless you first THINK them privately as a matter of normal thought.

    FACT: Britt said those horrible things using deliberate sarcasm and mean spirited wit, using a calm tone of voice. She was simply speaking her mind.

    FACT: Britt continued to speak this way after being made aware of the video camera.

    It’s not relevant if the cashier’s robotic demeanor provoked Britt to speaking those words since the very fact that Britt THINKS those things is what makes her a lousy excuse for a human being.

    From this day forward… Every single person she interviews might have relatives (siblings, parents, friends) who are introduced to Britt, and some of them will undoubtedly be fat and/or work in menial jobs as cashiers. … and they’ll all be wondering if Britt truly thinks they are lesser human beings.

    That’s why her career will never fully recover.

    Also… Any ESPN viewer who’s overweight or without a college degree (or who works in a menial job) will know that Britt thinks they are lesser human beings regardless of her scripted apology on twitter. Perhaps some male viewers won’t care, but plenty will care.

    That’s why her career is damaged beyond repair regardless of whether she keeps her job or not. She can’t un-ring this bell.

    Not to mention every hotel worker, waitress, cashier or other assistant who interacts with Britt (for the rest of her career) will KNOW that she considers them to be lesser human beings.

    It’s her THINKING that will prevent her from recovering, not the words she uttered.

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    1. The tow employee warned Britt she would show the tape so she had a hand in it’s release. Britt is entitled and spoiled and thinks she is prettier and better and smarter than everyone and this was her reality check. The cashiers demeanor is indeed relevant. People’s body language and demeanor can set others off as it did with Britt. Most ESPN viewers are men and don’t care what she said as long as she looks pretty and sexy. She will recover from this. Also behavior like hers in the show business and TV world is not new. It is more common than you are aware.Also people’s memories are short and most waiters etc are thinking about their tips not what an obscure ESPN reporter said years ago.

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      1. Wrong. Some of us remember the awful things people have said to us. It’s not about the tips for all of us. I’ve had terrible customers who leave huge tips and the next time they come in, I trade with someone else because I can’t take the abuse. To some of us, no amount of money is worth the bad feelings. If I wanted that combination, I’d become a prostitute for better money and the same abuse.

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  8. OK, I directly spoke to the office cashier myself and I need to point out that she DID try to deal with this issue by going through Britt’s employer privately first. But ESPN ignored her and only responded by blocking her from their Facebook pages. They simply did not care that one of their emoloyees had acted in such an abysive way to someone. So she released the video tape as a last resort. And even then, ESPN only gave Britt McHenry a little slap on the wrist with a measly weeklong paid suspension. I have a strong gut feeling that Britt is a personal honeypot for one of the high level executives at ESPN, and that’s why they are going to let her do and act as she pleases. It would also probably explain why she was hired by them so soon after graduating from college with very little news reporting experience. Britt McHenry is a nasty, insecure, horrible person who lashes out at A LOT of people. Believe me, I’ve seen it for myself many times.

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