Adam Lanza’s TOXIC Mother is To Blame For Sandy Hook Shootings


Now that we have processed the fact that twenty babies have died in an unnecessary act of violence, our emotions have turned to anger. With anger comes blame as many have spoken out about who they blame.

While the President and others have  blamed  assault weapons as the culprit and others blamed the  government for not having enough mental health programs, I put the blame where it belongs, on the mother. That’s right. Forget political correctness of not blaming the parents for their children’s actions. I strongly believe that this mother Nancy Lanza’s actions and non actions created this nightmare.

This Toxic mother’s denial, paranoia about doomsday, and her irresponsible behavior  ultimately caused 20 innocent  precious babies their lives and killed the hearts of anyone who knew these children, including their parents.


Adam Lanza was said to be suffering from Ausberger’s Syndrome- a form of autism along with many other behavioral and personality issues according to reports. But in my view it was not the Ausbergers syndrome that made him commit this heinous act.

In fact the medical examiner agrees with my line of thinking in that he consulted with the U of Connecticut’s genetics division to see if there was any identifiable genes that could explain this  this young man’s action.

Even if there is a genetic component found to Adam Lanza’s makeup that lead him to kill innocent people, my feelings are that it was exacerbated by the environment he was living in and  the actions of his mother .

As many have described him, he had issues relating to others, however one high school acquaintance described Adam Lanza  as being compassionate when that acquaintance was going through his own issues. So obviously that indicates that Adam was a very high functioning person with Ausperber’s syndrome. It shows that he knew right from wrong and had feelings towards others.

Adam was also said to have been very bright as he  attended college at the age of 16 and was a computer whiz. Evidence of his computer knowledge could be seen when the FBI and others could not fix the hard drive of his computer which he smashed.


This act alone shows me that this was a calculated act. He knew exactly what he was going to do and wanted to leave no trace of himself behind. The act of killing his mother while she was defenseless in her sleep speaks volumes. It reflects his deep deep hatred of her. Obviously he felt she was a negative controlling influence in his life when she was awake, so while she slept, he was the one on control over her life. He also preyed on others who  were defenseless – children.

He not only wanted to eradicate his mother, but anything associated with his mother such as her two “friends”- the high school principal and the school therapist, whom he shot and killed.

His anger towards his mother was not an overnight thing. There is no doubt she witnessed his rage towards her on a regular basis. In fact it must have become so bad that she apparently wanted to have him institutionalized and made legal steps to do so. This obviously didn’t sit well with her troubled son.


Her steps  at seeking help for her son were too little too late. She  no doubt must have spent her entire life with him in denial and the result of that was that she was shot in the face at close range by her enraged son.

The woman was apparently a survivalist. That is why she kept an arsenal of guns around herself and kept herself isolated. She didn’t share her feelings about her son with others. Instead she kept her son’s issues a secret and paid the ultimate price.

There is no doubt that her son who was with her 24/7 and had little or  no  productive outside interests, picked up on her paranoia that the world was coming to an end  or that there would be impending disaster to the point that she she had to have ammunition and  extreme firearms to defend herself.

It was reported according to the agents form the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives, that the mother took her son to local firearm ranges to practice shoot their assault weapons.

This information is devastating. How can a mother allow a severely troubled son who has no doubt shown fits of rage from time to time, to even get near a gun?

How could she allow him to play with violent video and war games as officials have discovered. In fact FBI investigator Robert Paquette reported

“Many of these games are very, very violent. I can’t help but believe these can affect the minds of someone unbalanced.”

Apparently the mother did mention to an acquaintance that she was involving her son with firearms in order to teach him responsibility. This is obviously misguided thinking.

If she wanted to teach him responsibility, she needed to get him a pet hamster or a dog and make him responsible to feeding them, not give him firearms.

What is very telling is that her older 24 year old  son Ryan  had not been in touch with his mother for years. Perhaps their estrangement had something to do with the way she lived her life and isolated herself and her younger son.

But perhaps the most telling thing of all is that according to the Office of the Chief Medical Examiner, in Farmington, Connecticut was that neither her eldest son, 24 year old  Ryan Lanza  or no other family member had yet come forward to claim her body and the body of her troubled son Adam.

This lack of identifying and picking up her mutilated body shows that her family including her ex husband Peter Lanza, speaks volumes in that he  essentially  holds her as well as his own son Adam accountable for the deaths of these innocent children.

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May these 20 little souls rest in peace forever.


80 thoughts on “Adam Lanza’s TOXIC Mother is To Blame For Sandy Hook Shootings

  1. I served on a board of directors wherein a mother who was a school teacher and her dyslexic daughter also served. I observed how humiliating it was for the mother. I am sure the strain was too much. I have a handicapped child, I design our life around her sweet person, it is not easy, but very rewarding. When we go to concerts etcetera, the world is usually kind, there are, however those moments that I come to understand why Lanza locked herself and her child away from a cruel world.

    1. Where were you Peter Lanza?

      You divorced his mom, you divorced him

      You ran like a coward- you left him hanging from a string
      Money in the place of a Father is a terrible thing

      You moved an hour away
      The further you moved- the more money it would pay

      The draw of money was so strong for you
      The price you will pay is more than money- so true

      You left your home for a new wife- a new life
      He wasn’t important- there was too much strife

      You left him at a time when he needed you most
      Your absence left him as a ghost

      Where were you while he was slipping away?
      You turned your back on him- we NEED to say

      Mom couldn’t do it alone
      You walked away- so much indeed for the world to pay

      From one Father to another- Sir, you have failed
      The pain for so many will never be curtailed

      He needed you- a Father- who abandoned his son
      You turned your back, he grabbed the gun

      You have failed the ultimate test
      Now 27 innocents have been put to rest

      What a world it could have been
      Had this “Father” not committed the cardinal sin

      Peter Lanza, the media says you wonder how it all came to be
      Look into any mirror Peter and you will come to see


    2. She should not have locked him away- she should have gotten him more help. I don’t think she wanted to face the problems her son really had- so he only had a form of autism. No problem he was smart. But she knew he was much sicker. She just did not want anyone else to know I do blame her for alot- along with his Father.

  2. Mothers have no clue how much influence they have on their kids. You hit the nail on the head and I hate to say it but it’s no doubt a good thing he took her life also.

    1. That’s a sick and twisted thing to say! You people need to get right in YOUR HEADS! The father TRIED to see Adam .. Adam withdrew from them. Do we know if the mom was getting ready to go to shooting range and was getting her guns out of safe? To we know ANYTHING of really what happened that morning inside the mind of a killer?

      The dad was VERY VERY involved in this kids life Until the kid cut him off !! do u think u will wake up one morning and ur child will kill u? Whether with a bat or a knife or burn ur house down w YOU in it! I see some of your twisted kids throughout my days and let me tell u ! U would be surprised on things they say … About their parents . Oh … But YOUR sweet quiet nice boy or daughter would EVER do that right ?? U guys NEED HELP !

      1. You eem abit impaired yourself ! Yet HERE U ARE! A lot of people think YOU ARE A NUTT CASE! But, not trying to take your rights away. ? U people don’t even have ANYONE but LAME MEDIA diagnosing him yet and you are diagnosing him as mentally disturbed! That’s disturbing . No respectful doctor diagnoses from media

      2. Katt we don’t need anyone to tell us he was sick- if you gave me a gun I would NOT go shot babies that had no defense with it- I WOULD HAVE TO BE INSANE!!!!

      3. I do agree about the gun issues. IF he had mental issues, there never should’ve been firearms however do we know when she discovered her sone was mentally ill? Again, mental illness does not surface until early to late 20’s/

      4. I take it you are not a therapist JB or you wouldn’t make such an ignorant comment and broad generalization. So to educate you on the matter, mental illness can surface at ANYTIME not just in one’s 20’s. Look at the Columbine shooters.They were on psychotropic meds and in their teens The same is true fro many of the other school shooters.

      5. You really said that? It is both parents that have the blood of 26 lives taken on their hands. Both of them. Regardless ms. Lanza died, she was no victim, hope mr. Lanza has some ability to realize he is as much to blame and tries to seek a way to redemption.

  3. I have been wondering if the mother was actually mentally ill and the son’s mental problems were genetic. Like paranoid schizophrenia.
    But I too believe the mother was a toxic influence on this family.
    Thanks for another insightful blog!

    1. Perhaps the x husband, or other son can enlighten the world if the mother was mentally ill…If that is the case it is a matter of the mentally ill aquiring firearms that needs to be addressed sooner, rahter than later.

  4. I agree. Did not know bodies went unclaimed. Father mum. Nancy Lanza friend (who also has son with Asperger’s and held a charitable event in Newton in the Spring for Autism) said on CNN Monday night that Nancy Lanza took Adam to Washington, DC around Thanksgiving. He met Nancy at My Place bar/restaurant. Those folks said she came in for a lot of take-out meals. She apparently bragged about her target shooting with Adam with these folks. Asperger’s do not usually drive and divorce papers promise car according to TMZ.

    1. LATEST info in the press saying Adam Lanza got his driver license in 2010. Press is also saying he wanted to join the military. I’d double-check both these claims.

  5. Wow = this article was thought provoking and insightful. No one is talking about many of the cold, hard facts you have observed regarding this case. There are instances in which parents are not making sound decisions and they, their children, and others have to pay the price for it. Thank you for your honest commentary.

  6. I thought I was alone in my thinking and feel relieved that I am not, Though what Adam did was on all levels of horrific and disbeliefs, I can’t help in feeling sympathy in his truly sad and troubled life, that his mother with all her wealth bought Guns instead of finding help for her deeply troubled child and is the true culprit in this unbelievable crime against these innocent babies and teachers …Do I feel sympathy for Nancy Lanza ? Absoulutely NOT ….I feel she pulled the trigger on this whole nightmare chain of events….I pray for all those lost and yes I even pray for Adam and may god help make some sense in this sad sad event ….

  7. I’ve been wondering if I’d ever hear someone say this, Dr. Glass, & you have. When scant information started to trickle in the first thing I thought was that his mother seemed to be very secretive about her personal life. It seemed she was more concerned about appearance than anything else. She seemed she wanted the world/neighbors to view her as a doting mother, & perhaps she was. I, however, have lived with people who were secretive & held appearance above anything else. That life for me was extremely abusive; verbally, emotionally, menally, & at times physical. I am glad I am out of that situation & have been for over 10 years, & I am still recovering.

    As more info started to slowly trickle in about the Lanza family I listened to person after person talk about gun control & mental health. Although much of it made sense, I couldn’t quite shake the feeling that something else was at the root of the whole situation. I still felt the mother had much more involvement with how Adam behaved at the very end doing this horrible deed, but I tried to put it at the back of my mind because she was such a “doting” mother.

    When I heard a young man who had been a sitter for Adam mention he was told to not leave Adam alone for a moment – not even to go to the bathroom – I was intrigued. He (the sitter) thought it very strange, & I thought there had to be a valid reason for this. Then I heard former school adviser, Richard Novia, speak about spending much time with Adam. Mr. Novia stated that Adam couldn’t feel pain. When I heard that a switch in my brain clicked. That had to be the reason the sitter was told to not leave Adam alone as it was possible he could’ve hurt himself & not realized it (or perhaps hurt himself on purpose).

    Then I wondered ‘why in the world would his mother teach him about guns & how to shoot them’ if she was aware of this lack of pain sensation. The “teaching him responsibility” excuse didn’t make any sense to me. The only reason I can think of is that she wanted to try to be closer to her son as she felt she was “losing him.” He seemed to enjoy shooting games & perhaps she thought taking him shooting with her would bring them closer as they would then have something in common. But even this didn’t quite ‘sit right’ with me.’

    I still continued to listen to the comments made by those in the news & those who would call in to give their comments &/or opinions. Still, no one (that I heard) said anything about his mother’s secretiveness or her facade. I am so glad I am not the only one who feels this way. Thank you, Dr. Glass, for this post. There were a few thing you wrote in it that brought to light what I’d neglected to consider.

    I check your site regularly & have learned much from your postings. I look forward to reading more in the future as you post new & interesting articles. Have yourself a jolly holiday & the best of the coming year.

  8. Alex, Please take your toxic hostility and contentiousness elsewhere instead of on me. Take it on the shooter and the MOTHER!!! Yes I stand by my view that it is the mother who created this mess. Any mother who encourages a psychologically unstable child to use firearms is at fault here. The mother is not the victim. She is the cause. The little babies and teachers who tried to save them are the victims. To say it is misoguytistic to blame the victim shows extreme ignorance on your part.If he lived with his father and his father exposed him to firearms I would say the same thing. So there is nothing sexist or women hating here as you so wrongly suggest. Perhaps it is your own issues that re surfacing here. According to his mother he was a computer whiz as she shared this with friends and even enrolled him in college at age 16 because of his computer savvy and academic achievement. There were HER words not mine. The FBI found that he purposely shattered his hard drive so those were the FNI’s findings not mine. Once again your comments indicate that you have far greater issues than the ones discussed in this blog. While I welcome difference of opinion and intelligent discussion, I do not welcome haters which you seem to be.

      1. to alex; If he had been living with his dad? You’re assuming this would have even happened if he had been living with his dad. I hadn’t heard that the dad kept multiple guns including a semi automatic in his home, nor ever took the boys shooting etc. Maybe he wouldn’t have done any better at raising this guy, but maybe he would have and this might not have happened. And it is not true there has been no father blame, just no one has spoken of it here, so far. There’s plenty of father blame out there on different sites. Supposedly it was the son who cut his dad out of his life, after the divorce, but since that happened while he was in mid teens, the dad could have gone ahead and spent time with him whether the kid liked it or not and didn’t do that. Instead he through huge wads of cash at the problem and left his troubled kid alone. But the fact remains that the person who was there, the person who was in charge and who shaped what happened with this kid (and I don’t mean the shooting) was the mother. From all reports she controlled EVERYthing that happened there.

      2. and one more thing; (I just went to the article you suggested rdg) it isn’t just anti gun folks who may be ignoring facts here. I don’t say people shouldn’t have guns, but anyone who encourages a very troubled, young, white, isolated male to become comfortable with an automatic weapon is NUTS. And defending that is like pitbull owners defending their right to have pitbulls, while not socializing their own pitbulls. After all, pitbulls needn’t be vicious, but it’s owners who won’t socialize them properly who make all the trouble for pitbulls. If I were a pro gun person, I would not be defending this mother..I would be saying of course this was irreponsible and we want gun ownership to be carried out in the most responsible way possible. We are open to ideas on how to achieve that so the general public will feel (and be) as safe as possible.

  9. Dr. Glass I truly mean no disrespect to you but Why are you even writing about this horrible monster. He should be given a number and made faceless. I usually like your blog but I want to forget his name and I am putting to memory the names of the beautiful people he murdered. I am sick of media that reports this and talks about it like it is record setting for the biggest mass murders for other sickos to outdo. So for the first time on your blog, I went straight to your comments because I wish everyone would forget his name and face. I want to.

  10. Have u seen the video of Robbie Parker?
    I find his laughing prior to press conf very disturbing. 1- for obvious reasons 2- it appeared he was preparing with method acting just after laughing and getting into character before camera. I know ppl act very different while mourning but THIS is very very odd . Not to mention WHY abd HOW u can even function at that time. Maybe u can shed some light onto this? Thanks. It’s floating around and I did get taken aback by it. Also I found a rather odd statement from mr Parker stating .. He has his agency? Im in the acting world etc and just a lot if words struck me as far as terminology .

  11. Mrs. Glass , you hit a home run with this one for sure.
    This women had some type of problem herself , because she told the babysitter to never turn his back on this kid. She then took him to the shooting range and showed him how to use dangerous weapons. The Mother new he was on serious medication and needed full time care to keep him from harming himself or others. If you need to tell a baby sitter to never turn their back on the child he could be dangerous he should be living in a special place where he can not harm other children or himself. The hair dresser even mentioned the kid would not move in the chair unless she directed him. Children in the neighborhood may have poked at him calling him names as well growing up. Children can be cruel to special need kids calling them retards and such. The kid was dangerous and the mother wanted him to fit in and be treated like all other children. Well it’s obvious he was different and needed special care. I believe the mother is the blame for each murder , because she new he was dangerous and she showed him how to handle a weapon according to news reports that he was going to the shooting range with her and learning how to use these weapons. The radio news also reported she was getting ready for Armageddon the end of the world and that’s why she had additonal weapons . If the kid was being brain washed about the end of the world coming and he was on medication for being delusional and had several weapons laying around the house unlocked . Hello America ! He was a product of his psycho home enviroment. A women in Florida this week went to a school with a sword and she attacked the building. A unstable person can kill with garden tools if they want. People have the right to have a legal gun for protection it’s the crazy people who kill inocent people. If he had not used a gun he would have used a knife or a homemade bomb, or garden tools. The same day this tragedy took place a man in China walked into a school and stabbed several children trying to kill them as well. Another horrible tragedy ,because this unstable person chose to hurt inocent people . If this guy was living in a state facility locked up in a monitored enviroment these children would be alive today.

  12. From what the news reported his older brother mentioned he was also on medication for paranoid Schitzophenia . The mother seemed to be paranoid as well with the end of the world . The video games are very violent and people who suffer from mental illness should not have them. The mother may have also been taking medication for paranoid issues. I stopped going to church along time ago ,because I think several of the preachers where toxic as well brainwashing people about the end of the world and Armegeddion in each sermon . If Jesus , is coming to get me why would I be scared and I wish he would just get it over with already. Who want’s to live in fear that’s not living . Oh , that’s right fear controls people . Fear is a control device and a person who is mentally ill can be easily controlled through fear. This kid was living in a very freightening world inside his head and his mothers closed walls called home.

  13. Any mother that keeps multiple assault guns in the home with a troubled son (autistic, no less!) is playing with fire. It’s outrageously wreckless! And any mother that would actually allow and encourage such a boy access to these guns must be mentally insane herself. Come on! He was troubled, autistic, could barely function (despite being quite intelligent). She was so worried about “losing him”, to the extent that she wanted to have him committed, that she…wait for it–taught him to shoot major assault rifles???!!!?? These were not mere hunting rifles. These were killing machines. How could she expose him to that on ANY level???? SHE was wreckless. SHE was irresponsable. Either she was crazy herself or just stupid or in denial. But the truth is she was at fault. This was her child. An autisic child to boot, that needed more care than your average child. Parents are responsable for their children. How she could keep guns like that in the house with an autistic son, let alone ENCOURAGE his exposure to them is the height on insanity. I mean, she felt she couldn’t handle him to the extent that she wanted him committed..but simultaneously she allows him access to these killing machines. She didn’t just expose him to them (which is wreckless enough) she encouraged his exposure to them and bragged about it. That’s insane. It’s dangerous. If she didn’t have enough common sense to see that, all I can say is I feel for this boy. His life must have been hell living with such a mother. She was in denial about his needs. Clearly. You know when an autistic person has a hobby it becomes all consuming. What a lovely hobby she gave him considering his condition. She put his life and many others in danger due to her outrageous recklessness. Dr. Glass is spot on. Anyone who takes umbrage with the idea that this mother was reckless, negligent, and ultimately responsable for this atrocity is having a defensive episode. I’ll bet anything they are a parent who recoils at the idea of a another parent being responsable because they have issues of their own they don’t want to be responsable for.

      1. Most teens are not THAT troubled – Do you even realize what this kid did? He was more then troubled trust me.

  14. I have posted my opinion on a couple of sites and a lot of people jump down my throat that I dare blame the mother, and that millions play violent viedeo gmes and don’t go out and kill etc, etc. I just don’t see you you couldn’t hold the mother responsible, maybe not 100% but up there!

    1) the guns thing..teaching him, storing them in his living space etc

    2) allowing him to move into the windowless basement and spend countless hours there on ANY kind of video games, much less extremely violent ones. With someone with Asperger’s Syndrome, as a parent you have to keep working to get them out there with others and keep helping them learn how to interact. Living in a basement with video games as the main activity creates isolation to a degree in people with not syndromes or problems.

    3) isolating him further than he would isolate himself (by doing all his interaction for him, buying a home there after she was divorced, that was uncommonly far back from the front of the property thus no one could actually see the place….less interacting, at least for Adam.)

    4) sheltering him from having to practice interacting with others buy jumping in and answering for him etc, etc. The Barber said he didn’t know what was wrong with the kid but in all the years he cut his hair, with all his repeated attempts to interact with adma, she’d jump in and take over. He continued to cut his hair until adam was 17 and she always told the barber how to do it, never did Adam speak for what he wanted.

    5) She would go to neighborhood functions at other people’s homes but she never hosted one at her own home. She was either embarrassed or she thought she was protecting him whilst actually causing maxium crippling.

    6) I don’t care about the asperger’s. Altogether separately from that, he was a troubled, young, white male,..isolated, without friends. That’s practically the profile of these kinds of killers. You don’t not only give them access to guns, and encourage an obsession with them, but store the weapons (including a semi-automatic) in your son’s living space. I wouln’t store guns in a teenagers room. People said well, he wasn’t a teenager, he was 20, well, that means he was just out of his teens (for whatever that’s worth) but the guns had been stored there for years,..meaning throughout his teens AT LEAST.

    I have a cousin who’s daughter is asperger’s and I have watched while through the last 18 years, she has worked to socialize her. She does/did the opposite of this mother, that is deliberately get her daughter into social situations and then would work to help her figure out how to interact. There was a saturday movie marathon at her brother’s place one time and her daughter suddenly piped up that this one actor was black. My cousin immediately asked her why she asked that and talked with her for awhile about why it struck her, even to notice particularly that the actor was black.
    It’s been years since and her daughter is high functioning though still noticably affected, and a couple of years ago started making friends in high school which has made her so much happier.

    This guys mom helped him to stay crippled, whether she knew it or not. And if he really was on medication for paranoid schizophrenia then the gun thing becomes not just stupid but criminal on her part.

  15. as in the casy anthony case, it became clear the apple did not fall far from the parental tree and the entire family were (and I’m sure ARE) toxic people…I don’t think anyone would say otherwise about Cindy anthony, but George, Lee and I can’t help but feel Lee’s sweetie since she stayed with him, she had to be able to stomach their behavior.. Well, in this case it is likely a family toxicity. (not that Adam Lanza’s asperger’s nor any mental illness he may have had, would be their fault..but how they handled it created this situation. We may call 20 year olds adults, but whatever the law says or popluar opinion says, the brain is not through plugging all it’s circuits in till around 25, therefore in my eyes, we are not adult till then. But I do not let him off the hook. As Lillian Glass said here, the act of destroying his computers before leaving to murder children and the fact that he wore a bullet proof vest show he formed intent quite some time prior to carrying out his plan. Destroying the computer shows that he knew what he was doing was wrong as he knew police would come lookin (i.e. he didn’t believe he was in a fantasty game and shooting elves or something) I once read you can tell what someone’s motive was, by the results of their actions..well, the results of his actions was maximum emotional pain, helplessness, enduring pain and no ‘closure’ as he attempted to prevent anyone from finding anything on his computers, left no notes etc. He wanted people to suffer endlessly with no answers.

  16. Maybe the Dad and brother stayed away , because they believed he should have been locked up in a special place and he could be dangerous at times.
    Maybe they new the mother had some serious borderline personality issues herself and viewed them both as hopeless. Just because the women lived in a 1.4 million dollar mansion that makes her a wonderful mother who volunteers her time a saint . Why was the kid allowed to play with loaded guns in a gun range. The gun range should have not allowed him to practice and learn how to do this alone. The people at the gun range where in danger also , because of the careless women. A lady in Florida last year took her son into the range and killed him and herself with their bullets. The preacher from Jonestown killed all those people and children. He had no gun ! He just brainwashed them and told them to drink poison . He killed more people that one day then most people with guns including this young man who suffered from A-syndrome . I would not visit my Mother either if she had guns laying around and my brother was going to the shooting range with her and he and she were unbalanced. Maybe the mother had a dangerous temper as well. I once read an article a Doctor posted that most medication for borderline personality disorders and other disorders of the brain as well have a side affect . Homicide ! So many people walking around these days and their eyes are just black buttons. I truly believe this medication is the home base that needs to be looked into. They don’t feel anything after awhile and these psycho killing games are programming their minds if they are medicated. Add a toxic parent to the list and you have serious problems. This guy was playing out the video game with real bullets! If you can shoot your mother in the face several times while she is a sleep , you are one sick mother- F.
    I don’t care if yu have A-syndrome or not there is something else wrong like voices that tell you to do something evil. Kill and murder innocent little children getting ready to open Christmas gifts and celbrate holidays all happy go lucky.
    They should have drug his dead corpse threw the street and hung him from the highest building leaving him for the crows and buzzards.
    A murder is a murder and that is that ,stop making excuses for their conditions and handicaps . Those children did not deserve to be executed . I noticed he planned to sit and wait for the Mother to return and start his psycho game rage.

  17. Just a thought…maybe Nancy also kept weapons and taught Adam to use them in case he needed to protect himself. I’m sure she must have been afraid of or had actually seen or known of his being bullied. I’m sure it was painful knowing or experiencing unkindness from the world. So, here Adam. Here is a gun. If anyone threatens you and I’m not here to protect you, shoot them. But be responsible dear.

    I know a mother of a special needs child. She is very delusional and angry I think. I feel she is sometimes jealous of typical kids and their parents. She is her child’s primary care giver with little support. I think the work of caring for him is overwhelming and she is mentally out of focus. And she makes bad decisions and has very warped perception because of bit.
    Just a thought.

  18. This is obviously the mom lording control over her Baby, and not allowing any input from older brother or Dad when they would bring up something about her little baby.
    I have seen this time and again, just watch intervention sometime and you will see just how blindly these mothers enable their kids,

    The courts are blatantly anti-father, and Peter wouldn’t have gotten custody from such a “dedicated and loving” mother. When the boy needs fatherly discipline, instead he just got more motherly nurturing. Instead of dealing with the issues of her sons journey towards evil, she placated him with video games, no responsibility, and guns.

  19. This is obviously the mom lording control over her Baby, and not allowing any input from older brother or Dad when they would bring up something about her little baby.
    I have seen this time and again, just watch intervention sometime and you will see just how blindly these mothers enable their kids,

    The courts are blatantly anti-father, and Peter wouldn’t have gotten custody from such a “dedicated and loving” mother. When the boy needs fatherly discipline, instead he just got more motherly nurturing. Instead of dealing with the issues of her sons journey towards evil, she placated him with video games, no responsibility, and guns.

  20. You’re an idiot and should have your license to practice stripped from you. With all your fancy degrees and fancy books you read you are still clueless and have not a lick of common sense. Do you even have children? So according to your theory the fact that I have guns in my home makes me an enraged lunatic scared that the world is coming to the end and if my teenage daughter ever gets so upset at me because I never let her go to parties or hang out with her friends late at night that she shoots me in the face in my sleep then goes on a shooting spree………that would be my fault? You’re RETARDED! It’s funny at the end of your rant that you show praise to the father that abandoned his son and hadn’t spent any time with him in two years………not any fault of his though huh? And you’re followers, all retarded too. I can’t believe you people saying that “it’s a good thing she was shot”. Are you serious? You should all be ashamed of yourselves. You are what is wrong with our country today. Quick to point fingers, quick to lay blame to inanimate objects and then squawk on with your anti-gun banter all the while blabbing about how good it is that this woman was shot by her own son with the exact tool that you hate so much. BIGOTS, all of you! I hope you piss your children off enough one day that they go do something irrational so that we can talk about how crappy of a parent you were, karma will come to bite you in the rear eventually.

    1. Brian take your TOXIC animosity and hatred elsewhere on whom it belongs- the mother and the shooter who killed innocent babies. No name calling is welcome here and you are no longer welcome here. No one said guns in the home make you a crazed lunatic although based on your rageful comments you may want to check out your obvious displaced anger issues. People who are MENTALLY ill should NOT own guns or be exposed to them. Period! It would indeed be your faulty is you were proven to be mentally unfit to own and definitely your fault if your daughter was mentally ill and you encouraged her to use firearms. This mother’s judgement was wrong and so is yours if you feel the same way she did in my view.

      I did not praise any father so I have no idea what you are talking about. Read the blog before you blow off your anger uncontrollably and irrationally. i said the father didn’t even claim the ex wife’s body or the son’s body at the time the blog was written.

      Calling someone RETARDED is unconscionable and as a result banned from ever addressing this site.Please do yourself a favor for the New Year and seek professional help for your clearly displaced anger which I believe may go a lot deeper than this blog.

    2. It’s the children and adults that like to call all other children retarded and make fun of them toxic . People who like the word retard and directing it at others who have a different point of view usually are the ones that create the toxic behavior in humans. Karma is also for people who have negative energy ,thoughts and actions. NO one has perfect thought and actions. Unless you are a saint that is holy and above all and others walking around calling people retards. God bless, you Mrs.Glass , you are one class act and loved by many in this world for your incrediable work .

  21. I have no anger and apologize for my disrespectful language. Praise may have been the wrong word but the lack of addressing the fact that the father was not in the boys life and at the same time hammering the mother so severely is essentially letting him off the hook. He should be the last person pointing fingers at the mother. Your post upset me because I felt that as a health care professional your diagnosis should be unbiased and based solely on fact. i.e. Fact: she was an irresponsible gun owner in that the guns were not properly stored. Opinion: that she should not use firearms as a tool to teach him responsibility. I just feel that you let too much of your personal beliefs. So many “supposed facts” in this story have changed so many times over the last week I don’t think that any of it can be assumed to be fact at this point it’s all hearsay and therefore too soon to be pointing any fingers, especially this aggressively. The babysitter said, the father and brother that weren’t even around said…it’s all people trying to cover their butts at this point. Adam may not even have been as bad off as everyone is claiming. Of course neighbors that are anti-gun are going to label her as a survivalist merely because she owns semi-automatic rifles and pistols and goes to the shooting range. They obviously didn’t know her enough to base that opinion on fact because if she was so secluded they wouldn’t know first hand. I have some of all the guns that were used in this incident, I have played first person shooter games since they first came out when I was a teenager. I have no desire to go out and massacre anyone, nor do I feel the need to prepare for the end of the world. I am a licensed gun dealer. I do not sell to anyone that I sense is not right in the head even if they answer all the questions on the paperwork correctly. But, if you lived next door to me and did not like guns and rarely ever talked to me…you or some of your followers would assume that I was a “Toxic” fanatic because I went back and forth to the gun range with my high capacity semi-automatic rifles and pistols on a regular basis. The fact is I’m quite the opposite and would be one of the best neighbors you could ever have. If you’re not home (even though you never talk to me) and I see someone breaking into your house or violating your spouse/children, you can bet your bottom dollar I’m going over there and giving them something to think twice about. Because even though you don’t care for my values or gun ownership (and I use “you” as a general term) as an American I value your right to not have your stuff stolen from you or your family members innocence stripped from them. That is all I am saying. I will leave your blog alone. Merry Christmas!

    1. Brian- What about my request “you are not welcome on this blog site” do you not understand? While I always welcome differences of opinion and open discussion I insist on respect and no name calling like calling someone an idiot. If this blog can make you so angry that you have to resort to verbal violence please do not read it or go near this blog.

      You clearly missed the whole point of my blog in thinking of your own agenda and becoming hoty headed over nothing. This is NOT about gun control. People can do as they wish in this country and own as many guns as they wish and shoot as many guns as they wish based on the second ammendment. But when you have a psychologically impaired person in the home you should NOT encourage them to use firearms in any way shape or form.Period!!

      Once again Brian, please respect my wishes and refrain from reading my blog and from making any contact with me or my readers.

  22. If my husband was on medication and had anger issues and anxiety attacks and locked himself up playing violent video games there would be no gun in my home period. All kitchen items including steak knives would be removed to protect me and him. If you are told to never turn your back on your loved one even to go to the restroom you need to use exstreme caution to protect your other children and neighbors as well. This kid became a recluse and that’s usually not a good sign . At this point my loved one would be signed over for special care! Who knows what type of medication he was on that spaced him out at times. How long was he on medication ! The mother did not deserve to die the way she did , but her actions of being careless with her son was a ticking time bomb. I think if there had not been guns in the house he would have used some other item laying around the house to take her out . He shot her while she was a asleep several times and that seems like deep seated hatred towards her.

  23. there is a murder trial coming up where I live and I know the woman on trial, Peggy Sue Thomas, plus the widow of the man murdered, Brenna Douglas, whom most of us believe was in on it but whos not on trial due to lack of evidence. I made the mistake of talking about it with a store clerk I know who is in agreement with me. The bag boy carrying out my groceries was quite upset and said he was friends with the kids and he didn’t believe the mother could have done that. I am continually astounded that people think because they knew and had pleasant interactions with someone, that person could not have committed a heinous crime.
    I mean, how often do we hear neighbors saying something like ‘he was always quiet and friendly, I can’t believe he would do __’ In this case with Adam Lanza going on a killing spree, all the neighbors and friends and family talk about how nice his mother was..And people with their own experience, raising children with austism/asperger’s get outraged by people blaming the mother. But what we outsiders can know is just a tiny part of the whole picture. Apparently, no one knew how she interacted with him when on their own. But we do know she gave access to guns including a semi-automatic to her asperger’s or autistic son who not only was coping (or not coping) with his condition, but had a number of other issues and was going downhill (or so a family member said the mother had told her) I think she may have been defensive about the right to have guns, and proud of her stance, that it never occured to her to look WITHIN her home at danger, rather than scanning OUTSIDE for criminals approaching her home.

  24. You’re right Dr. Glass, and thanks for rising above the PC to say so. This isn’t, or shouldn’t be anyway, about the second amendment.. I support the second amendment. I’ve been shocked ever since I learned this mother actually took her son with all these problems and taught him to handle dangerous weapons to “teach him responsibility.” It’s one of the most insanely irresponsible acts of parenting I’ve ever heard of. And others can post all the “she was really a nice person” articles they want, but nothing will change that. The only thing nearly as shocking to me is how many, at the time or even now, won’t see how irresponsible it was.

  25. So, lets not talk about the father who abandoned him? Please. Sounds like he took out his anger on everyone else but who probably did the most harm.

    1. Do your research my dear- the boy had a myriad of psychological issues stemmin g back from his childhood. Certianl types of mental illness can surface in one’s 20’s but there are often subtle signs a lot earlier. He had Asbergers syndrome so he was not socially adapttive, He had to be home schooled and had issues early on. This did NOt happen overnight! So JB do your research before you let of your TOXIC vehemence.

  26. The father FAILED him, not his mother who tried to help her son. I dont think it’s right for anyone to blame this woman who was gunned down in her own home while the father wasnt around, was a coward as he obviously left his wife to pick up the pieces that he most likely left behind.There is no evidence saying that this poor gunned down woman was the cause of anything. Look at the father’s life, and there you’ll find the answers. Who is to say that she wasnt armed to protect herself from him?

    1. I completely blame the mother for introducing him to firearms when she knew he has mental issues. She left the father. She divorced him and he took it hard according to those who knew him There IS evidence tjat she introduced him to firearms as those at the gun range mentioned it. She was a survivalist who thought the world was coming to an end. She was not in fear of her husband and for you to make such libelous statements is irresponsble.

  27. To be honest. I’m tired of blaming others for ones doings. How about the blame goes on the shooter?? That is where the blame should go. How about the responsiblitly is placed where it should be! That is the problem with society! The blame should be placed on the person doing the crime, not everyone else’s fault….That is where things need to change. Self responsibility people~

    1. The blame is on the MOTHER period. Those precious babies would be alive today if she didn’t intorduce him to firearms and encourage it. She needed to lock the guns up knowing he had mental issues. The shooter was angry at his mother and he killed his mothers dear friends- the principal and the psychologist at the school and the innocent children. The mother created this mess when you take into account his mental illness.

    2. JB, I blame his mother. IF Adam Lanza was mentally imbalanced (separate from Asperger’s Syndrome) then his mother was extremely negligent to allow him to LIVE in a windowless basement with her stored guns which included a semi- automatic weapon. They were all concerned he might harm himself rather than others, so why leave him with guns??
      Adam Lanza’s mother Nancy Lanza told a friend that she was afraid she was ‘losing’ her son, whose behavior was gradually getting worse.
      Less than a week before her son would launch his horrifying attack on Sandy Hook Elementary School, gun-loving mom Nancy Lanza knew “she was losing him” and that “he was getting worse.”
      “Nancy told me he was burning himself with a lighter. In the ankles or arms or something,” he recalled of a conversation they had about a year ago. “It was like he was trying to feel something.”

      If she voiced these concerns then leaving with weapons was beyond ridiculous, it was negligent to the Nth degree. Even if no one thought he would harm another person, that he was burning himself with lighters would ring all the alarm bells because of his deteriorating condition, he might use the guns to ‘harm’ himself, even if in earlier years he could bee trusted with them.

  28. I am in agreement here I blame the mother, she was a control freak and clearly had issues herself, she was to involved in the upcoming doomsday and prepping for it she should have helped her son who was clearly screaming for help…..

  29. The good thing is Adam took himself out.
    I’m sure if he had been arrested he would be released in 10 years good behavior and back on the street to search for new victims. A man released a few weeks ago in Orlando walked into a McDonalds day later and killed a man in a wheel chair that could not defend himself. The man was stabbed to death by this murder. This man was just released from prison for killing another in the past the same way with a big knife. The man was paying for his food when he was approached by this menatlly disturbed man. What Doctor signed papers to have this man released period ! NO gun was needed , crazy people kill on a rampage when they feel like it.

  30. If the Goverment ever decides to take away the publics right to bare arms then we will have big problems. What if the country becomes so broke they open the jails and prisons and set them free. You just never know ! This is the greatest country in the world , but you never know if it will become one of the brokest. Have you people heard of the RDIF Chip that will become manditory for the Obama Health Care Sytem. I was on a web site and it was mentioned on certain radio shows . I think it was the California Cost to Coast show I love. All Americans will be injected with the inplant the size of a piece of rice. It mentioned all Americans had 32 months to get this inplant and it will have all your health care ,driver license, social security and info on it. It will show if you have medicaid and medicare . It starts to take effect March 23, 2013 and their is 32 months to complete it. If you choose to not take the chip you will not get health care. Is this true ? Is this really law 44 passed part of the Obama Care?
    This is being put into place due to all the medcaid and medicare fraud which has cost this country trillions of dollars reported. Is this story really true !

    1. being cautious and aware of dangers is smart, being so fearful that you could actually believe the government would try to have everyone ‘chipped’ is paranoid and gulible. When people start down the survivalist path, it seems to be hard for them to not go off that cliff into true imbalance

      1. lYNN, to show you I am not someone sneers at being prepared; I have:
        * 2 months supply of essential medications,
        * 2 or more months suppy of food,
        * child locks on cabinet doors with breakables(earthquake area)
        * alternate source of heat,
        * stored water & 1st aid supplies
        * and a backpack in the trunk of my car with supplies and an old, comfortable pair of shoes, coat, mittens etc, plus sleeping bag.

  31. The fiscal cliff ruined alot of peoples Holidays this year .
    They beat us to death advertising this big mess.
    Just when we get over all this mess in a few days it will start again if the RDIF chip story if it is true. That news will start March 23, 2013 and that is all the world needs.

  32. Dr. Glass,

    I just came across this article now and while I’m still reserving judgment until all the facts come out, I think you raise many valid points.

    I do have one request though. Can you please remove the picture that you have identified as the killer AL? It is actually a picture of Ryan when he was younger and I feel he’s been hurt enough by all of this. Thanks in advance.

  33. Wow, you are one of the last people I would have expected to come across making statements about the Sandy Hook massacre. I thought you were a respected figure in your industry as a communication expert, not a sideline psychologist. Your post and subsequent replies to your commenters are disturbing in regards to this trend among professionals who blog.

    1. Kay I comment on all kinds of things including TOXIC PEOPLE based ont he best selling book I wrote, This mother was indeed TOXIC in my view and I hold her accountable for allowing him to interact with guns when she knew he was mentally ill. For the record I am a behavioral analyst.

  34. “No respectful doctor diagnoses from media”

    Katt, you are right. This is all based on hearsay published by the MSM, not by actual analysis of the facts. I find Dr Glass spot on when she analyzes photos, etc, but this is pure speculation based on unsubstantiated statements made by the news media.


    1. No, it is my view that any mother that exposes her son to firearms is TOXIC!!! This was substantiated by several of her fiends and neighbors. he has a mentaldisability and had no business with guns.I hod her accountable.

      1. What specific body language and behaviors were you able to observe in videos and photos of Nancy Lanza? I have seen just the one photo of her. I respect your work in general and as I said I have found it to be very accurate. But here you are making judgements based on unsubstantiated media reports. Did you know that the Wall Street Journal actually had a reporter go out and investigate (imagine that) and in a 50-mile radius no shooting range had ever seen Nancy and Adam Lanza?
        Unsubstantiated media reports are what you seem to be basing your analysis on, not photos or videos, and I feel it is unfair to Nancy Lanza.

      2. I hadn’t heard about the gun range and no sitings! Must say I’m NOT surprised! This is a fake story set up as a false flag! Not saying some weren’t killed or hurt or in the dark on it! But, sooner ppl study ” false flags ” all the way back to hitler and us n JFK w Cuba ! U won’t get it. It’s documented in gov docs they do this to us yet no one wants to talk about it

  35. I don’t see that blame is productive and if Nancy had thought her son might shoot someone she wouldn’t have left firearms where he could get them, or even had them. Clearly she didn’t think ‘Perhaps my son is capable of unspeakable acts of murder, I think I’ll fill the house with firearms and just hope for the best’ Nobody saw it coming, least of all Nancy and I think it is an abuse of your position to call a murder victim toxic when you have never met her or evaluated her. I also think that your habit of calling your posters out on alleged mental health issues and sarcastically suggesting that they get therapy is not very professional and smacks of passive aggression. Also your spelling would benefit from spell check. On a last note have you considered that using the death of ‘poor babies’ who you didn’t know as a platform to promote your book and opinions about the toxicity of a murdered mother could be considered somewhat toxic. Oh beautiful irony.

  36. BOTH parents were idiots, have you seen the mentally ill photo of the murderer as a toddler with a gun in his mouth? Surrounded by weapons of mass murder? Mr. Peter Lanza is guilty also, both parents are/ were nuts when it came to guns. If Mr. Lanza has a soul he would want to dedicate his riches and life towards the lives he help to destroy. Nice birthday card to his son read that they could go shooting, sickening family and horrible parents who had too much money and no sense!

    1. What pic of gun in his mouth?

      she locked her guns up . I’m sure we don’t expect out kids to blow us away. However – THIS kid was mental so I think EXTRA precaution was warranted as well as NOT being vocal about such guns around him etc. looking back on this now absolutely they should not have been showing him guns and taking him to gun ranges. And the dad is a pos sissified male. He said horrid things recently about his OWN son !!

  37. Lanza’s mother is 100% to blame. If you are an adult and are rational, this is why.

    Fact #1: His mother obtained combat-grade weapons and trained her mentally-deficient son in their use. What. A. Stupid. Whore.
    Fact #2: His mother was a “prepper” which is to say a survivalist who intended to forestall demise because he/she deemed it necessary to stockpile supplies for an impending disaster. I. Welcome. The. Tinfoil. Hat.
    Fact #3: She knew her son was mentally deficient to the point of what lawyers call “non compos mentis,” meaning he was incapable of knowing the consequences of his actions. “I’m cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!”
    Fact #4: She knew her son to be a certifiable whack-job and failed utterly to exercise discretion in her search for an institution in which to place him where trained professionals could see to his responsible care, and that son learned about her plans and fomented a magnesium-hot loathing for her and everything she stood for, including her love o0f the Sandy Hook School!!!!!!!!!
    Fact #5: THIS IS THE BIG ONE: She completely failed to secure her firearms in a gun vault where they would be rendered useless to a mental degenerate who was furious at her plans to incarcerate his mentally degenerate ass where he could not harm anyone, including himself. THIS IS A COMPLETE FAILURE FOR DUE DILIGENCE.

    Adam Lanza’s mother is 100% responsible for that carnage in CT. And nobody will acknowledge it because she is a woman who was murdered in her sleep.


    Lesson: Liberals are a cancer. They need to be expunged.

    And for God’s sake, repeal the 19th Amendment!

  38. This tragedy is not anything we are going to get over, nor never should. The brutal annihilation of innocence 6 year olds and their teachers is beyond comprehension during any time in human history.

    It brought back front and center recently with President Obama. I have to say I cried again when I saw him crying about those Angels. I still wanted to believe that the US public and our elected political officials can see that no amount of legislation or grandstanding is going to replace people being personally responsible. The mother Nancy Lanza was absolutely 100% irresponsible having that amount of fire arms around and extremely mentally ill young man. That combined with completely having him isolated, ( didn’t come out of his room for three months, battery dead on car because it hasn’t been started, etc). She had a personal responsibility in getting this young man help and it’s removing him from her care was going to do it, it absolutely should have been done. This constant making excuses just isn’t going to do.

    Thank you very much for writing this article as it drives home exactly what I have been thinking since our roles was polluted with the likes of this woman and her son.

    Very respectfully

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