Does Kate Gosselin’s Body Language Say She’s Trying to Make A Positive Change? Kissing and Hugging Her Kids Seems Like A Good Start


From my perspective as a body language and communication expert, I fairly call things as I see them. My comments are based on behaviors in people  I have seen over time, in videos and in photographs. For those who think that you can’t tell anything by looking at one photo or one video, I beg to differ with you.

You certainly CAN tell a lot, A PHOTO especially of you have been properly  trained and  you have been doing it for over two decades as I have. In fact the FBI, uses video and photo analysis to analyze people’s behaviors. Sometime, they only have one photo or one video at their disposal.

I am also proud to say that I have even lectured  to members of the FBI and other members of law enforcement on the topic of body language and communication, so I definitely know what I am speaking about in this regard.


So, for those of you who are fans of Kate Gosselin and say that no one can tell about her from one photo like the one where she rudely, and aggressively and abusively in my opinion placed her hand over her son Colin’s mouth (and where there were a series of such photos), I can assure you that you can tell a lot.

You can tell even more about Kate and her behavior after looking at hundreds of videos and photos of Kate with her kids as I have. You can tell even more about Kate, now that Jon is out of the picture. When Kate has been out publicly with or without the kids, there has consistently appeared to be a lot of anger emanating from Kate’s face. She rarely looks happy, playful, light and joyful and always appears upset about something.

This analysis is made on her facial expression and muscle movements and body language. It is NOT based on her looks or dress or facial features or hairstyle. Body language analysis has NOTHING to do with these elements. It has ALL to do with BEHAVIORS and Kate’s negative behavior is reflected by her body language. That is a FACT.


Kate and Jon’s body language analysis have NOT been made on whether I like them or not.  When I have said anything about Kate’s egregious abusive behaviors at times (slapping and verbal abuse and anger) inevitably a few of Kate’s loyal and staunch fans, who in my view may also be abusers themselves if they so strongly  identify with her abusive behavior, can’t see past it, and think it is OK) have wrongly accused me of “hating Kate”.

I can assure you this is NOT the case.  I have provided my list of those I “hate” for you to see on several occasions.   Kate is NOT on that list.  Unless she becomes a terrorist, child molester, kidnapper, torturer, or rapist, or infringes my copyright or trademark or names her book the same name as one of my previous best- sellers like Toxic People TM, causing confusion in the marketplace, Kate Gosselin  will never make my list.

My list is mainly reserved for monsters like Hitler, Amadinijad (the Iranian hate monger), Fritzl (the Austrian who impregnated his own daughter and kept her in a dungeon-like prison). So NEVER accuse me of hating Kate Gosselin because I do NOT hate Kate Gosselin, Those are  my final words and you have heard it from MY mouth!


One thing you will learn about me as you continue to read my blogs, is that I am fair minded, level headed, have self- respect,  and I do not tolerate BS.  I call it like a see it both positive and negative. I do not have an axe to grind, an agenda,  nor am I am not jealous of anyone, or have anything to prove. Instead, I own and respect every part of me.

I have spent a lot of time  and effort in my life learning about myself throughout the years. As a result, I am rather secure about who I am, my state of mind, background, physical appearance, personality, relationships, emotional makeup and know  EVERYTHING I know about me –  better than anyone else out there.

Kate, it seems may be just beginning to look at herself, which I applaud. This is a VERY GOOD thing. I would like to think that perhaps my blogs may have been a catalyst for her  or her handlers to take a closer look at her behaviors. I certainly hope so, for the sake of those 8 precious kids.


One week to the day where Kate was upset at Colin for dragging up his coat of the ground, not looking pleasant or happy as she picked her kids up from school

and abusively putting her hand over Colin’s mouth. There was a dramatic change in Kate’s behavior, as she dropped them off to school in the wee hours of the morning.

Even though she still has a serious and unpleasant facial expression, devoid of smiles and warmth, she did something that we should have seen her do a lot more of over the past five years- kissing her children and giving them affection.


This is one of the RARE times we have seen Kate KISS and hug  her children (except for the perfunctory Birthday kisses she gave  each one at their 5 year birthday Party ). Perhaps she herself, read my last blog calling her on her abusive behavior. Perhaps someone may have shared my last blog with her where I said the following:

“She needs to get on her knees every day and say a huge thank you to good Lord above for giving her physically healthy, bright, and beautiful children.

What goes along with that prayer of  gratitude  must be her actions towards those wonderful innocent children. She needs to treat them with the respect and dignity they deserve.”

I would like to think that perhaps my words resonated in Kate’s mind, since the timing of her kissing ALMOST ALL of the children as they hopped out of the van, is uncanny.

Of course little Mady, one of the twins  (the one who called Kate “mean” and with  whom Kate has appeared to have the most issues,

and little Aden

and Joel all ran off the bus as quickly as possible sans kisses and hugs.

But later Aden returned and got a kiss from Kate.

The little girls who were dressed alike in pink with brown polka dot pants all got kisses.

Even Colin, the one who’s mouth she put her hand over a week earlier,  got a kiss on the head

and Cara got a hug from Kate

That is HUGE! And in my opinion a GREAT START!  I hope she does this  not just when camera’s are rolling and papps are out in full force. Kate now needs to find inner joy in her kisses to the kids and eliminate that sourpuss expression when she does it.  She needs to smile and show the love, to go along with her kisses and hugs which kids so desperately need for their emotional development.


One of the things the papp yelled out as he was shooting the photos of Kate getting out of the van to let the kids out,  caused my ears to perk up. He asked Kate the following question, “ Are you mad that you’ve gotta take  anger management?“

Now I don’t know if the papp asked that question to provoke Kate, which papps have been known to in order to get a specific reaction shot, or if he was privy to some information that Kate may indeed  be undergoing anger management classes.

If that is the case, I say good for her and that it is about time. She definitely needs it. The throwing things, consistent meltdowns, slapping, and verbal abuse we all saw for the past five seasons show that these anger management classes may very well help her and will definitely help the kids.


Maybe TLC put her into anger management classes . Maybe they are working on remaking her inside as well as her outside as evidenced by the $7,000 hair weave they gave her. Perhaps they are helping her to get rid of all of her inner anger before she starts her new show for them.

TLC announced last week that her new show is scheduled for the spring or summer. Like it or not, Kate will have her own television show.  I really don’t fault Kate with trying to earn money to support her huge family, since she is in essence, the only breadwinner these days, while

Jon runs  around town with his new lady, a little over a decade older than his twins Cara and Mady at the Sundance Film Festival.


If a TV reality show is the easiest way for Kate to make a buck to support those wonderful kids, I say why not? She cannot afford to stay home and be a full time mom, as she has to shoulder the finances, thanks to Jon.

I also believe that as long as she is attentive to the kids and addresses their physical and emotional needs why shouldn’t  she have a career she enjoys.

But if she plans to have a career on television that will last for any length of time and TLC is going to do it, and allow her to be on a show where she has flexibility in her schedule, unlike DWTS which is a rigorous schedule, like I said before TLC  MUST invest in helping get her a makeover on her inside besides her outside.

No one cares about hair extensions or a new look. No one  will ever want to watch a show with a person who exhibited the characteristics she showed during the past five seasons and on her two TLC specials and on all the talk shows on which she appeared,  the fake tears, over the top exaggerated claims, the sarcasm, the snarkiness,  the abusive behaviors, the self absorption, the narcissism, the self-entitlement, and the lack of gratitude, not to mention the embarrassing lack of talent she showed on her skits on Leno. It WON’T fly!


First, there was talk in the media where Kate was getting her extensions to have a sexier look as TLC was going to do a show to help her find a new man. Unless Kate works on her inside, it will be a futile attempt.

Unless she works on her anger (which takes time) and many of the traits described earlier, no man will look at her unless he is equally as self- absorbed and a Toxic opportunist who wants his 15 minutes of fame. I think TLC was wise enough to figure that out as well.

But I don’t believe they were wise enough to do what they are planning to as they announced this past week and give her a show where she will try different professions. It’s a lame idea for her and will not work in my view.

It’s an idea that was done years earlier by E! when they put Paris Hilton and Nichole Richie in different jobs.  It worked then because it was Paris Hilton and Nichole Richie and they had IT- personality and charisma and humor combined with  talent. This same concept with Kate Gosselin at the helm, will fail miserably simply because she does not have IT!


I know a lot about IT! I have seen IT in my two decades of practice when I helped actors become the best they could become in terms of their vocal and speaking skills.

When an actor walked into through the doors of my office and we worked together, I learned to immediately tell who had IT and who would become a big star. As conceited or arrogant  as it may sound,  truth is,  I can honestly say,  I was NEVER wrong about who had IT!

I saw IT,  in now super stars Andy Garcia, Nicholas Cage, Marlee Matlin, Rob Lowe, and Melanie Griffith just to name a few, well before they made it big. I saw how they had IT and told them that one day they would make it to the top.

I saw IT with many of the newscasters and entertainment reporters you see today on popular television morning, evening, entertainment,  and shows today, well before they made it. I saw that they had IT and  told them so.

I even saw it with Nancy Grace when I was a constant guest on her Court TV show back in NYC. Because we spent so much time together on the set, I  told her that one days he would be a HUGE STAR because she had IT! I am proud to say she did make it- HUGE and no one could be more deserving!

Just as I can tell who has IT, I can tell who does NOT have IT. I am sorry to say Kate Gosselin  does NOT have IT.

Kate was lucky to have had a show featuring her children. The appeal was watching the kids grow. The appeal was  not Kate.  She was NOT a breakout star like little Snooki is on MTV’s  the Jersey Shore.

I would think that little Mady is was more the breakout star of  Jon and Kate Plus 8 . She had vim and vigor and charisma. Even though she was upset at Kate a lot and hungered for attention, she seemed to naturally be in her element when they took modeling photos of her.


So now  with all the hoopla that surrounded the Jon and Kate Plus 8  show and Jon pulling the plug on it, TLC wants to make back some lost revenue, so they are  giving her, her own “itless” show minus Jon and the kids since, he pulled the plug.

I can guarantee you that if all of that hoopla between her and  Jon had not gone down, causing her considerable name recognition, no one would ever give this woman a show because they would clearly see that she doesn’t have IT.  Any producer or any suit worth his weight knows she is ONLY getting a show because of name recognition and lost revenues.

TLC has been scrambling with what type of show to give IT’less,  name recognizable, Kate,  who is known only because they put her on every TV show to discuss her divorce woes. They tried to build up her TV cue by having her co-host the View and appear on the Today Show and Leno and the Barbara Walters special not to mention every magazine cover on the newsstand.

They knew the dating show wouldn’t work, so they  resurrected MTV’s concept and put her into a show where she will experience different professions like Paris and Nicole did. That show worked because of Nichole’s wit and humor and Paris’ glamor and hotness, garnering  a lot of male viewers. But to put Kate in  that same type of show is ridiculous in my view.


If TLC is intent on doing a reality show with Kate that will last and that people will want to watch, name recognition certainly  isn’t enough.  I think a show where Kate gets a TOTAL IMAGE MAKEOVER FROM THE INSIDE OUT would be a huge hit!

Everyone seems to like makeover shows, so why not makeover Kate?

The fact that Kate is showing some love and affection towards her kids is a good start in my opinion.  They can show the “before and afters” of how Kate was harsh with the kids and how she is now more loving and affectionate.



The premise of Kate’s new show as I see it would be to watch her transform from this angry, hostile, self- absorbed, snarky, sarcastic  self entitled woman to a kin, loving, and generous, selfless person with a lot of heart.


1.Perhaps we can see how she unselfishly  devises a plan to raise money for the kids in Haiti and even travels over there to help out, donating some of her kids used toys and clothing to the children in Haiti.

2.Perhaps we can see an episode where she resurrects her relationship with her parents so that the kids can  have grandparent contact.

3. Another episode could include her brother and Aunt Jodi kiss and makeup session.

4.Then there can be other episodes where she repair all the damage she created with others she alienated.

5.We can watch how Kate struggles with getting rid of her anger and all her demons. We can even watch her in Anger Management Classes . Now that is compelling Television!

6.We can watch her use her nursing skills and volunteer, giving some love and affection to some elderly people at a nursing home. She could even bring them cookies her kids made for them and watch them smile and make their day.

7.We could see her at a pet shelter volunteering   there and see how she breaks down when she learns about animal abuse and puppy mills. We can evens see her feeling so badly about what she did by giving her two German Shepherds away that she can now retrieve them and let them be a part  of her now happy home. With all the money she will make  from her new show she can even hire a special babysitter for the dogs so they won’t be an added burden to her.

7.We can watch her go into orphanages and love up some of those kids who need affection and give them some of her kids used and outgrown clothing and toys. We can watch her develop more love and tolerance with these parentless kids.

8.We can also watch her in a pediatric ward with AIDS and drug addicted babies where she can hold them and feed them and attend to them so that she can think twice whenever she gets angry enough at one of her own children to stick her hand over their mouth.

9.We can see how Kate takes workshops and seminars on self –development  to help affect a more positive change in her life. That would even be inspiring to others.

10.We can see and episode where we revisit the place where Kate grew up and went to school and how she felt growing up. We can trace back where her anger and “meaness” and self- absorption  and self entitlement  came from. That would, no doubt,  be an emotion filled episode

11.We can watch her in therapy with Dr. Phil. He will tell it like it is. He won’t stick up for her. He will tell her what she has done wrong in the past and what she needs to do now. That would be compelling TV as well.

12.Then we can watch her start to get attention from men and go on a date. We can see her fears and hear what so many others go through when they begin to date after never having dated in years. We can see how she messes up on the date and what she learns from it.

13.We can see her get more spiritual and perhaps even go back to church and see the positive  impact that has on her.

Throughout the show we can watch footage  that allows us to see Kate grow. Since TLC owns all the footage to Jon  and Kate Plus 8 we can see a lot of  before and afters of how she handled things then and how she handles then now.

Now my treatment of Kate’s new possible show takes us through an entire season of 13 weeks. I’ll bet if they followed my treatment it would be a huge it! It would be great  to see a show like this where Kate could inspire others and not upset so many viewers as she has in the past.


17 thoughts on “Does Kate Gosselin’s Body Language Say She’s Trying to Make A Positive Change? Kissing and Hugging Her Kids Seems Like A Good Start

  1. Dr. Lillian,
    The comment that the pap made to Kate about being forced into taking anger management classes was in reference to an article on an internet site that does strictly satire. It was a really good piece. It would be fantastic if only it were really the case.

    I would really like a full epidsode of your new Kate show to be devoted to real in person apologies to some of the tens of thousands of church goers that she and Jon scammed–(with TLC’s blessing) by charging very excessive speaking fees, 1st class travel and accommadations, $10 & $20 bucks for photos etc. LONG PAST the time that they were in any true financial need. They never revised the content of their “speech” to reflect the new fancy lifestyle that they were truly living. Shame on them & TLC.

    The next full episode that I would like to see would be devoted to sincere apologies to US the viewers, for scamming the public for such an extended period of time about having no “nannies”, no organic chef, etc. It would be really healing for her to admit the lies that she and Jon + TLC perpetuated on us the viewers; concerning the marriage ceremony in Hawaii. Jon has claimed that the 1st week that they returned from that trip that Kate told him that the marriage was over. I beleive him. Aunt Jodi and Kevin have also confirmed this. Kate has continued to lie to the viewers and the media about this. It would mean a lot to hear her apology for these lies.


  2. Dr. Glass,

    I always enjoy your blog but this time I disagree with your comments. You mentioned that you thought your words “resonated in Kate’s mind.” I think they resonated with her management team and they set up this bus stop photo shoot. Kate’s team probably saw all the negative blog comments and decided to do damage control. I don’t think there is anything Kate can do to turn her image around.



    1. Lauren, you make an EXCELLENT point. Perhaps it is wishful thinking on my part that Kate realizes her behavior is damaging and tries to change it. But you are most likely correct in that it may very well be her management team doing damage control. Upon closer examination, she isn’t smilig during all the kissing and hugging. People usually smile and show joy during affection giving. There is no joy which validates your point. Thank you and I appreciate your reading my blog and your input.


    1. So do I . Just wishful thinking on my part to try and see an opening of a positive change, no matter how small. But unfortunately, the lack of joy during her affection giving validate your points that it may very well have been for PR damage control.


  3. Dr. Glass,

    PLEASE tell us you are joking and this “Fixing Fake-Take-Hate Show” is pure satire that you dreamed up while sitting in the make-up chair, getting ready for your appearance on “Inside Edition.”

    This is a TERRIBLE idea. Don’t you realize those eight children are already so damaged and dysfunctional from living the past “five seasons” of their lives on a television show that it will take every last dollar they’ve earned to find intelligent and ethical therapists who are sharp enough just to get them (the kids) through their teen-age years with MINIMAL EMOTIONAL SCARS and SCANDAL?
    And now you want to REWARD their destructive manipulative “Itless” mother by SHOWCASING the sins and shortcomings of this faux demigod?

    Gee Whiz, Dr. Glass. So the kids grow up thinking life will always “be served to them on a gold platter,” they’re always FIRST and never have to wait their turn or in line, whenever they WISH FOR or want some new “toy” it magically shows up at the FedEx store, some guy with a funny accent delivers dinner (with flowers AND wine for mommy) every night, they will continue to communicate by screaming, shouting, hitting, and pitching a fit ’cause that’s what mommy does… All this and more, as their inflated egos wrestle with their deflated sense of selves, intellectual ignorance affects their self worth, and their sense(s) of entitlement clashes with issues of abandonment. What to do, what to do?

    Take responsibility for their screwed-up selves and get some help? NO! PERISH THE THOUGHT! They’ll call in the television cameras to fix them, call Dr. Phil, maybe Dr. Laura… or Dr. Glass? After all, that’s what mommy did and look at her, just look! She knoes how to LIE even better now ’cause she got some HELP…


  4. Thank you, Dr. Glass, for your insight into Kate Gosselin inside and out. I happen to agree with your assessment of her chances of any show catching on if it is built on her nasty personality.

    But I have to say that although the list of shows you posted that Kate could do, including working at an animal shelter and raising money for the needy, sounds really nice, I don’t believe for one moment that either Kate would do it or that she would be doing it for the right reasons. She is clearly into herself and that is where her interests begin and end. We would see through any attempts to force her into a situation like those because we all know she doesn’t care for others at all and isn’t willing to even sacrifice for her own kids, nevermind the needy and ill.

    We saw her very limited nursing skills demonstrated as she ripped out Jon’s hair replacement staples, not even bothering to remove the hairs from the staples before she ripped them out. We’ve seen her all grossed out when her own daughter bit her lip and it bled in a store. She has no compassion and is therefore no kind of nurse to inflict on anyone.

    This family made a lot of money, wouldn’t you say? I think she should withdraw from the public eye, have someone invest the money for her so that she can have a decent income and support the children on THEIR MONEY. And maybe she can be what she always said she wanted to be, a stay at home mom.


  5. Thank you very much for your analysis. I am a huge fan of yours.
    OT – tomorrow a hearing on the Casey Anthony case is scheduled to start @ 1:30 pm and it would be so nice if you could analyze Casey’s behavior and also her defense team, if it’s possible, of course. Thanks!!!
    Have a great Sunday!!!


  6. Yeah, something doesn’t look right in any of those pics or the video itself. Like it was all stage. What were a “video” camera doing there for the 1st time in how long? Previously they were all paps taking photos.

    All of a sudden we have a video of Kate being a “mom” for the 1st time? lol

    Good to see she is “trying” but I am doubting her “intentions”.

    Look at the kids. They’re not the one running to her to hug or kiss her. Kate looks like she’s forcing it.. Just for the cameras.

    The kids were even seen “smiling” and posing for the cameras. What gives? Staged? I think so.

    So much for “hating the paparazzi” Seems like Kate is full of it.

    Good to see she’s trying, but “suspicious” that this came after the negative photos of Kate were spreading all over the net.

    So this is more of a “damage control” than anything.

    Glad to see the kids smiling tough.


  7. If Kate’s PR team is reading this blog and taking notes, then kudos to them, although I think it is a lost cause trying to get that leopard to change her spots. However, I hope they don’t mention to Kate that Dr. Glass thinks Mady has “it” because Kate will lose her mind with jealousy. (I completely agree, however, that Mady has “it” while Kate does NOT!)


  8. Oh, Dr Glass! I love your observations, BUT on this one, I do believe it is all wishful thinking. How many times have we seen damage control after every mess this woman creates? As far as a show about her sudden change into a decent human? I really don’t think that will ever happen. Kate thinks she is perfect and knows all. Hard to change that mindset, and change her nasty attitude. I really don’t think Kate can love anyone, except herself. Sad to say, but that is what I get from her. I sincerely wish TLC


  9. Ooops .. I sincerely wish TLC would just stop promoting this “itless” woman and give her a job behind the scene. I am sure they can put her somewhere off camera. They owe it to them, making milllions upon millions and paying them, in camparison, a mere pittance.


  10. I think your ideas were wonderful. I think many people would really watch something like that.

    But from the comments you have received here no matter what Kate does the people who have made a hobby of hating her will never change their minds.

    I really wish Kate would go into therapy and anger management classes. I truly believe she has a very stressful life and needs to learn healthier ways to deal with the stress.

    I too only wish her luck in her future endeavors and that is why I don’t understand why everyone says she doesn’t deserve to earn a living in obviously the way she wants to. Everyone should have the chance to try.

    I was wondering if you had any children. I have three of my own. I have to admit that I am sure at some time I have put my hand over my child’s mouth so they would be quiet.

    Don’t get me wrong. I am no fan of Kate Gosselin, most of the time I am apalled at her behavior. But I have 3 grown well adjusted college educated children and don’t feel I harmed them in anyway. They are all productive citizens and have never spent a day in jail.

    I do have one problem with one of your suggestions of making it right with Kevin and Jodie. Jodie spread unsubstantiated rumors that Kate was having an affair. There has never been any proof of this. I really have to question her motives behind this and the lack of her brother defending her in this matter.

    If my brother’s wife made such a suggestion about me, I am sure that he would have defended me and told his wife to stop it.

    We truly don’t know the day to day life of this family. I understand that you are an expert in your field and respect you opinion.

    For all we know Kate could be in daily communication with her parents and sisters. We just really don’t know.

    But I do agree with you that Kate is in need of therapy and I really hope that happens and she kind find inner peace.

    I am also curious about your opinion of Jon’s behaviour. Not his interactions with his kids because everyone can see he truly loves those children and enjoys them.

    I’ll be the first to admit I was not a perfect parent and I do not relate to the way Kate interacts with her children.

    I spend a lot of time with my 2 grandchildren who are 6 mos apart and are both 5 yrs old, a boy and a girl.

    I watch Supernanny and find that I deal with them differently than I did with my children. I also admit that I deal with them in a much better way.

    What would be interesting is a series of Kate with Supernanny. Because JoJo addresses the problems with the parents and how they interact with their children. Now that would be a series.


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