When any woman or man says that they have been abused my ears perk up and heart goes out to them. Domestic abuse among couples must never be taken lightly. It crosses all, ethnic groups, cultures, socioeconomic groups. It doesn’t matter how rich, poor, beautiful, or smart you are. It can happen to anyone. In fact this is a topic I am addressing in my next book which will be out Dec. 2010- my sequel to Toxic People. So when Hailey Glassman said Jon abused her and cried real and genuine tears she got my attention. When Star Jones, who is one of the sharpest women around and sees through people’s BS, especially as a former prosecutor questioned Hailey I believed her allegations against Jon. I believed Hailey because she said she wanted to stay with him even after he abused her. This is a very typical reaction of women who are in the Cycle of Abuse. In fact studies show that they go back and forth from 7 to 10 times before they actually leave their abuser.
Haliey’s tears were real all right, but they weren’t about Jon’s abuse. They were about how the public perceives her. They were about the nasty comments people make about her as I discovered when I saw her on ET with Mary Hart. So when I took a closer look, I realized something major was off! Suddenly I heard the vocal whine sans tears. I heard the talk of how she is called a home wrecker and how if her father is a plastic surgeon she should get plastic surgery and the whine about how people in the public think she is ugly. Then when she started laughing through her whine as she was taking about Rabbi Shmuley and saying to Jon how she was the one who helped him, not Rabbi Shmuley, I then and there it was a fake. When Mary asked Jon how he met Rabbi Shmuley and he said through his manager I knew it was now a complete fake as I started to put all the pieces together which I will share with you later in this blog.
So Mary invites Jon to come and join the interview with Hailey, acting more like a couples counselor tjhan as a journalist. But as a real counselor, who has counseled couples, I can assure you that something major was amiss. When you talk to couples who have issues, there is no laughing, no leaning towards one another and none of the other signs I saw between Hailey and Jon. Something was completely off. This was not a couple in crisis or a couple in trouble. What we were seeing was a couple who were in cahoots to scam the public
Their agenda was image repair for the both of them- to make Hailey not the home wrecker ( a term she kept bringing up several times) and the magnanimous caring person who wants Jon to be friends with the ex wife and be there for all the birthday and holidays. In my 2 decades of listening of couples this is a major bone of contention between couples. Most exes don’t want their new mate to be friends with the ex. Usually it is the new wife or husband or girlfriend complaining that the their mate is spending too much time with the family on holidays etc and they feel neglected. So this was another “tell” that something was wrong. The image was to make Hailey, in her own rehearsed words: to “act like a 22 year old and live a life.” Jon also brought up her rehearsed lines when he said “if I were a 22 year old I would want to experience life”’ So there you have that. Then there is the issue of Hailey’s tone of voice. It no longer sound like a hurt victim, It sound like a very strong if not pushy woman trying to tell Jon what to do (I tell him to be friends with Kate( “I tell him…”_) Her vocal tone is strong and rich and resonant and a little too confident to the point of sounding pushy and domineering.
Jon’s agenda was to distance himself from Hailey so he can in his own rehearsed, unemotional, and untrue words to “start over from scratch and do the right thing and pay attention to his “moral compass” words Shmuley no doubt told him to say.
Then there are the shoulder shugs, the lip licking,, lack of emotion, lack of looking at Mary or Hailey, darting eyes, uhms and uhs. There is no question in my mind that this is clearly a media ploy..
So here is the REAL STORY as to what no doubt happened:
Jon was getting flack from the public and in the press for being with all these different women. AS they came forward and ratted him out as to what a jerk her was, it made his image look very bad. So he and his “manager” attorney Mark Heller decided that he should no doubt have one girlfriend –Hailey Glassman. But people still didn’t like the fact that Jon was still married and dating another woman In fact Larry King was the first to bring it out in the interview where Jon came on the show wearing his purple shirt with his Manager attorney Mark Heller. Larry told Jon that he had not yet gotten a divorce and she was dating another woman. Perez Hilton also mentioned this as well and went steps further calling Hailey “ Home wrecker Hailey and also addressing her looks. His millions of fans also weighed in with comments that Hailey wasn’t pretty and that if her father was a plastic surgeon why couldn’t he fix her face. Nancy Grace even let him have it as well on the Insider with regard to his not even being divorced and dating.
So his management team decided that in repairing Jon;s image, it’s best to distance Jon from Hailey. So they stick her on the air on the Insider on a Thursday and on a Friday to drop the Abuse Bomb. That certainly gets everyone’s attention. Now it is poor Hailey and she comes a sympathetic figure as everyone pleads with her to leave him (even me).
Then on Sunday we see Mark Heller’s hooking Jon up with his buddy and “spiritual advisor- Rabbi Shmuley Boteach and attending his synagogue to openly apologize to Kate on Shmuley’s gimmicky apology sessions. It’s kind of like the gimmicky Kabbalah Center’s “sharing” concept where you share your wealth with them. Only Shmuley uses the concept of “appology” because “sharing” is already taken. Boteach is the same spiritual advisor who sells out Michael Jackson and writes a book about Michael and tells how Michael really about Madonna (she was mean) . To me that is NOT a spiritual advisor. To me it is a TOXIC Opportunistic User. If Michael spoke to a Rabbi or a Minister or a Priest or a Monk ahout his inner thoughts, these thoughts must NEVER be revealed even after the person has died. Shmuley knew better to do that when Michael was alive or he would have sued the heck out of Shmuley. So in cowardly fashion Shmuley tells all about a man who is no longer alive to defend these allegations. In opportunistic fashion, he is there to make a quick buck off of Michael’s death. Perhaps Michael saw through Shmuley’s phoniness and that is why they had a falling out. It’s all despicable to me.
So spiritual advisor in the form of Opportunitstic User Rabbi Shmuley, Shmuley makes a statement to the press saying that he told Jon that he should get divorced before he starts dating. He also gives Jon words to use like “ moral compass. “ On Sunday when Jon apologizes at Shumley’s synagogue, it didn’t seem very sincere to me. It seemed like a memorized script.
Then on Monday when they know Kate is making her debut to clean up her public image with the new TLC special, they stuck Hailey on ET to go further into the abuse allegations .As she appears in the studio, my first thought is why is Jon with her and who is setting up these well orchestrate interviews with these top media venues like the Insider and now ET?
Being on both sides of the media as a personality, interviewer and commentator and having been booked as a guest to promote my own books I can assure you that getting media time to promote something is no small task. Some shows want exclusivity while others have other restrictions. So you need to have it all put together by someone who knows what they are doing when they book you. Needless to say some pro was there to help promote Jon and Hailey who may have approached ET.
So when I saw Jon in the room during an interview where is girlfriend was going o talk about Jon’s abuse and he was not on the set with her to address his side, I knew something seemed “fishy.
The interview with Hailey was indeed fishy. She was too whiney and too confident in talking about her image and how people call her home wrecker ( a Perez Hilton term) and whiny about people out there talk about how ugly she is and how come her plastic surgeon gather doesn’t fix her. Ah ha I thought That’s it. She’s not on to discuss the abuse but rather to discuss her image and to admonish the public for saying these nasty things about her. That is clearly her intention.
Being a veteran reporter and interviewer and smelling fishiness as well, Mary Hart invites Jon to come and join the interview. Here is where you really see the lying, the deceit, and the BS and their clear intention of image repair in action. Their agenda was to tell everyone they were taking a break from their relationship but their reactions certainly were no of a couple who was taking a break. There would be genuine tears and upset—not laughter… There would be no uhms and uhs or shoulder shrugs and looking away. Then Jon breaks a “bombshell.” But he is too relaxed in his reveal. His words are too rehearsed as he says how he needs to start over and “get in touch with his moral compass.” There is no breakup. There is only manipulation.
Jon is a Passive Aggressor as we discovered on his show and which he has since openly admitted. Passive Aggressors are snide and sarcastic in their cut downs. They don’t usually brow beat or verbally abuse in the way Kate abused. You saw his abuse in action. He will make a sarcastic comment or mumble under his breath. So when Hailey accused him of verbally abusing her, at first thought he was mirroring Kate’s hostile behavior to him. Perhaps he found a meeker woman and was doing to her what Kate did to him. But after watching the dynamic of the two of them, I saw how Hailey was no shrinking violet, In fact she was no victim and could for sure hold her own not only against Jon but against Kate as well.
Another thing that was telling was Kate’s reaction on her TLS Special on Monday night after being told by the interviewer that Jon was abusive to his girlfriend Hailey. Kate’s response was very telling as she lived with Jon for 10 years. She knew he wasn’t aggressive or an abuser. You could see in Kate’s body language that she looks down and looks surprised by this allegation against Jon. Her exact words are :I don’t know” I’m not going to disparage him.” She didn’t know because she never saw him abuse anyone, It was news to her. It was news to Kate, who knew him best, because it wasn’t true!
Then as the interview with Mary progresses with Jon you really see the deceptive tells in action. Hailey is laughing. She knows this is a big joke. She knows this is a huge act and that is why she is laughing as Jon is asked probing questions. She can’t contain herself. The act is getting deeper and deeper and her laughter indicates that she is getting nervous and uncomfortable. It is her body language reacting and saying “ this is a huge joke- OMG people are buying it- I can’t believe it!”
Jon even makes a LAME rehearsed statement that he would break up with himself if he were Hailey.. What?? He then reiterates the rehearsed lines Hailey used about being 22 and wanting to get a job and a profession. It is a clear manipulative attempt to pave the way towards Hailey’s carear in getting someone perhaps interested in her working for them in the fashion business (kind of like what they did with the Ed Hardy people)
Then when you see the interaction between hailey and Jon with the laughter and the part rehearsed back and forth part improve (bad improve) so see the whole picture. They are like two bad actors going through a script.
Then Mary probes deeper and Jon realizes he may have gone too far especially when the sensitive topic of the kids come up, so in Passive Aggressive mode, he runs away and leaves the interview. Unhooking his own microphone, he leaves the set. Now Hailey;s reaction confirms it’s all a scam. She has no reaction. She is matter of act. In fact Mary asks her if she wants to go after him. Hailey does not go after Jon or see if he is all right. Instead, she just sits there like Richard Heene Balloon dad sat there when he was asked by Dianne Sawyer if he wanted to tend to his vomiting boy Falcon. We later saw how Richard was a fake and now we see how Hailey is a a fake.
It was not a live interview, It was taped with Jon and Hailey. So if someone you love is upset, you leave and follow them or you have a stunned or upset expression on your face, Hailey did none of the above, Instead she had a very relaxed and matter of fact look on her face.
The whole thing sickens me! For those of you that tell me I am a Kate Hater and a Jon lover, I am NOT. I am repulsed by BOTH of them. You are seeing BOTH of their TOXIC PEOPLE behaviors in action. They are BOTH TOXIC in their own way and Hailey is TOXIC as well. According to my book TOXIC PEOPLE, Kate is the “Bitch Bossy Bully” to Jon’s “Passive Aggressive Silent But Deadly Erupting Volcano.” Hailey is the “Instigating Meddler” combined with the “Gloom and Doom Victim.” They are all examples of what NOT to be.
After this latest fiasco there is NO forgiving Jon or Hailey for that matter or Kate for that matter. The public is NOT stupid and when people like these two and Kate as well think they can manipulate the public they are definitely mistaken. The truth will come out eventually as it has here. Jon’s horrific action’s don’t negate Kate’s horrific actions and vice versa. They are equally bad and equally to blame. They are blessed to have normal mentally and physically functioning children but they are ruining them.
Why is everyone so concerned about the Gosselins and what they do? It’s because of the kids. These kids do not deserve to be in the middle of this craziness. It will definitely affect them and already has as you will see in my next blog. The Jon and Kate saga is what can happen when two average people who apparently once loved one another enough to create a family get attention and fame they are not equipped to handle. They become greedy, selfish narcissistic, manipulative, hurtful, lying, angry, hateful TOXIC people who not only crush one another but crush everyone else in their wake. They ALL suffer from “Knute the Bear Syndrome”- the Berlin polar bear who was followed by the press since birth became narcissistic and violent and a sociopath according to his vets after not getting enough media attention as he grew older.
Kate took fertility drugs. She was a nurse and knew quite well what would happen- multiple births. She didn’t think ahead before she took the drugs as to what would happen and how she would care for them. That is irresponsible. She expected others to do it for her and appalled the public by stating that it was there responsibility to help pay for her kids because the fertility drugs were out there. Well so is heroin and you have choices as to whether or not you will take it. She had a choice. She has tuned into an evern more selfish greedy very TOXIC person. WE know Kate and is she filled with HATE. She does NOT need a show, She needs therapy in a major way. So does Jon. WE care because they made us care.
Kate wants us to take care of the kids. We will. She can’t have it both ways by sticking them on camera like zoo animals for money and now insisting on privacy and having a HATE HATE relationship (in her own words) with the papps who let us in on her life with the kids. Since she wanted us to be involved taking care of her kids we will tell her that she is an awful abusive person and mother as you will see for yourself in my next blog. They ALL need therapy and the media venues MUST not allow themselves to be conned by these three no matter how good the ratings. WE all see through the scam and we don’t want anymore!