Body language is both an art and a science. It is an art in that it takes a lot of practice and skill to become adept at it. It is also a science in that researchers for decades have specifically documented certain signals that allow us to understand what others are really communicating. Some of these signals are universal while others of which are cultural. Anyone who negates the importance of “body language” especially in this day and age, is completely ignorant and should be ignored. Understanding body language and acting on what you observe in others can change your life. It can even save your life!
THE BODY DOESN’T LIE!
Whether it’s saving yourself a lot of grief in the dating arena, knowing if your husband or wife is cheating on you, finding if a someone with whom you’re doing business is trying to con you, feeling more confident you’ve picked the right baby sitter, or wondering if that person planning to board that plane is a terrorist, you have to know how to effectively read people’s, body language. You have to know “before whom you stand” Why? According to my quote which you commonly hear me make throughout the media, it is because “the body doesn’t lie!” Neither does the voice or communication patterns.”
Body language is not only about body movement and action. It involves facial movement and expression, the sound of one’s voice and content of what a person says- their speech. In this “computer age” it also involves a person’s writing. You can learn a great deal about someone by the information that they “leak” out about themselves in the written form. This is especially true for those who blog and even more true for those who blog “anonymously.” These people feel more free to leak out pertinent information about themselves, because they assume no one will know their identity. It gives them a sense of freedom to say whatever they want, without being accountable- even if it is malicious.
]USING BODY LANGUAGE SKILLS ON CYBERSPACE FROM DETECTING CHILD ABUSERS TO MALICIOUS ANONYMOUS BLOGGERS
Those who are involved in fighting cybercrime such as discovering the identity of child abusers and child molesters and/or sexual predators on line are adept at using body language analysis skills to discover pertinent information about the perpetrator which they leak out that often leads to the perpetrator’s identification. In profiling these perpetrators, which includes analyzing personality traits and other important data they may leak out , the information eventually incriminates them and often lead to their arrest and subsequent incarceration.
Child predators and abusers are not the only people on the internet who wreak havoc on other people’s lives. The internet is full of them. How can we ever forget the toxic adult Lori Drew who pretended she was a teenage boy on a social networking site only to emotionally abuse a fragile teenage girl Megan Meier who ended up committing suicide when the phantom boy ( the adult woman) rejected her. While she may have escaped prosecution and incarceration by the skin of her teeth, in the court of public opinion she has not escaped the public’s wrath who find what she did unforgivable.
PROFILING THE MALICIOUS “ANONYMOUS BLOGGER” VIA BODY LANGUAGE ANALYSIS
The “anonymous” malicious blogger is yet another internet parasite creating havoc for others over the internet. Recently, I was able to use the same body language analysis skills that law enforcement agents have used to not only discover the identity of a one such anonymous and malicious blogger but as a result of my formal background and study of psychology I was able to have added insight, Therefore, I was able to construct a profile of the malicious blogger which includes an analysis of personality traits and other pertinent information. I did this by using the body language analysis skills I describe in my best-selling book about body language called “I Know What You’re Thinking- Using the 4 Codes of Reading People to Improve Your Life.”
After I discovered the identity of the malicious anonymous blogger, by using my body language analysis skills I could easily see a lot more about who this person was and what made them “tic”. I could see that:
a) she (the blogger was a “she” based on the linguistic components of her writing and also the fact that she mentioned a “husband” and “kid number one” and “kid number two” ) was no stranger to malicious blogging. In fact, when I pulled up her name on a google search, the internet was filled with postings and websites from countless disgruntled people who referred to her and her actions in extremely unflattering terms.
b) she, in my opinion had emotional disturbance issues involving anger and ill temper as she herself even identified her own negative personality traits in her own blog by referring to herself as “crotchety”. Several other self references and entries related to her anger issues which she described in her own words throughout her blogs further added the reasons that I came up with my opinion.
b) her nasty blogs were no doubt, the result of professional jealousy, as my body language analysis skills lead me to opine. The malicious anonymous blogger’s jealousy apparently got the best of her after seeing her”target” (who is in a similar field) interviewed on a television show. The blogger couldn’t contain herself. Taking to her keyboard once again, writing yet another malicious blog where she took shots at her “target’s” expertise. In doing so, the malicious blogger completely ignored the fact that she was in pending litigation with her “target”. Not a very smart thing to do! No matter what anyone says about their First Amendment Rights, the bottom line is that the malicious blogger’s professional jealously obviously clouded her intelligence and common sense by continuing to incite flames, especially during a legal battle.
( As a side note, after discovering the identity of this malicious blogger and analyzing her personality traits based on her own words and behaviors, it is so sad to observe people who are so consumed with jealousy and hatred. Unfortunately, it isn’t difficult to forsee the upcoming tragic future for these self tortured souls. The jealousy and inner hatred they consistently display will eventually do them in as they get cancer, a heart attack, or some other fatal illness. Hatred always consumes the hater. We must never forget that!
So body language analysis is not only used in detective and cyber detective work as in the case of discovering the identity of the malicious blogger for instance, body language skills are being used more and more to help people in a variety of professions.
BODY LANGUAGE ANALYSIS SKILLS IN THE LEGAL FIELD
Most recently I was able to use my skills in a divorce case where I examined the body language of both parties to see what was really going on “between the lines” and to observe signals of deceptions as well of signals of possible psychopathology. The bottom line is that it resulted in a more positive settlement for the party for whom I was working. I have also used my body language skills in numerous criminal cases. In analyzing the surveillance tapes of a drug deal, I was able to help determine that the attorney’s client was not directly involved. I also used my body language skills in the area of speech and voice forensics where I was able to help acquit an attorney’s client accused of armed robbery, based on his voice and speech quality. Through body language analysis, I helped numerous attorneys in the courtroom by sharing with them what juror, their witnesses, and their clients were thinking about them .
BODY LANGUAGE ANALYSIS SKILLS IN THE BUSINESS WORLD
I also used my body language reading skills to help a major businessman who was doing a very financially significant business negotiation. While observing his opponent’s body language , I was able to share with him that his opponent was still open to further negotiation- valuable information which resulted in a major financial victory for the businessman.
BODY LANGUAGE ANALYSIS SKILLS IN THE ENTERTAINMENT FIELD
The entertainment field is another arena where I have showcased by body language skills by instructing actors, many of whom you have no doubt seen in films and on television how to integrate the right body language with the characters they are portraying. For many of them, it resulted in Academy, Emmy, and Tony Award winning performances.
BODY LANGUAGE ANALYSIS SKILLS IN THE MEDIA
In addition, magazines and Newspapers from Newsweek to Wall Street Journal to practically every celebrity magazine in the US, UK and abroad have used my body language reading skills to analyze celebrities and newsmakers each week and what is really going on between the lines. Viewers have seen my body language analyses of newsmakers on television on almost every network.
One of the reasons why I’m repeatedly invited to do my body language analyses is because of my rate of accuracy in calling it like it is. In fact, last week I got kudos from an editor for breaking the story about two celebrities who denied their involvement but who now are an “item”.
One of the reasons my accuracy rate is so high in my body language assessments whether they be criminals, politicians, sports figures or celebrities is due to the extensive and unique background and education I have in various fields. That background combined with the extensive knowledge I have in such fields as communication, psychology, communication disorders, medical genetics, law, law enforcement, hypnotherapy, and journalism allow me to integrate and synthesize information I have culled from such a large body of knowledge. That along with decades of practicing in reading people is where the art comes in as I am able to do it quickly and effectively.
BODY LANGUAGE ANALYSIS SKILLS AND YOU
With shows like “ Lie to Me, based on the work of professor Dr. Paul Eckman, my own work and the work of others in this remarkable and exciting field , there is becoming an increased public awareness and appreciation of how essential it is to understand another’s body language. In fact it may be the key to unlocking the truth about them, what they are really thinking, and how they really feel about you. So when you are looking at someone, listening to what they say, or reading what they right, pay close attention to every detail you see, hear and read. It may prevent a lot of unnecessary problems and serve as a warning sign to identify and subsequently deal with the Toxic People in your life.