Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer Song About TOXIC Bullying Added Verses In This Age of Zero Tolerance Against Bullying
December 25, 2012

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The other day I was in the car listening to the radio,  when the popular Christmas song Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer came on . I began singing along with it and for the first time realized how the words to this catchy tune tell a very sad story.

t starts off fine describing a reindeer with  his red nose  as the lyrics are:

 Rudolph the red nosed reindeer                                                    

Had a very shiny nose

And if you ever saw it,

You would even say it glows

Then it goes on to describe how the reindeer was bullied and ostracized, simply  because he looked different. This verse actually saddened me as I listened to the following verse:

All of the other reindeer

Used to laugh and call him names

They never let poor Rudolph

Play in any reindeer games.

Luckily for Rudolph, Santa became  Rudolph’s savior as Santa  came to his rescue by  acknowledging Rudolph’s difference and turning his physical  difference and uniqueness into an advantage and an asset. It was because of Rudolph’s   unique difference which allowed    Santa to  navigate his sleigh through the foggy night.The lyrics are as follows:

 

Then one foggy Christmas night

Santa came to say

“Rudoph with your nose so bright

Won’t you guide my sleigh night?

 

Now here is the part that disturbs me. Only because Rudolph was useful and did something heroic based on his  physical difference did the other reindeer finally accept him.  Otherwise , they would never have  accepted him into their group and allow him to play reindeer games with them. Below are the lyrics which disturbed me.

 

Then all the reindeer loved him

As they shouted out with glee

Rudolph the red nosed reindeer

You’ll go down in history.

These superficial  reindeer needed to accept Rudolph red nose and all from the beginning, not because he did something which helped Santa. Obviously these  TOXIC reindeer only liked him because he  now had Santa’s blessing who accepted Rudolph’s uniqueness which allowed him to become a  hero.

I don’t think the song  should end there. To me, it is not is finished.  It’s missing several  verses in my view so I took  my songwriting and skills to task and took the  liberty to  write some very much needed verses that apply in this  his day and age of zero tolerance for bullying.  So here are the additional lyrics I wrote  to the tune of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. 

Then Rudolph told all the reindeer

You hurt my feelings when teasing me

Just cuz someone looks different

You don’t have to be a bully 

 

We come in all shapes and sizes

And  just  to be direct

We all want  love and kindness

And  to be treated with respect.

 

I hope you learned your lesson

That teasing makes others blue

Everyone has feelings

Just like  me and you .

 

So in the  Spirit of  Christmas 

Where forgiveness is number one

Never  tease others

Cuz you can  really hurt someone.

 

While the song written back in 1939  by Robert L. May and  published by Montgomery Ward  and adapted into songs, television specials feature films and has become a figure of Christmas folklore, I believe that these  additional meaningful verses are  now needed  to teach children about the consequences of bullying  and hurt feelings in this age of Zero Tolerance for  Bullying.

                                                                                                   

  MERRY CHRISTMAS   XO

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Broken Relationships, Mean Girls,Toxic People Fallout From Presidential Campaign Need Healing
November 6, 2012

The Presidential Election is finally over and President Barack Obama has been elected to a second term.  Even though I did an inordinate amount of press for it from numerous Associated Press interviews to appearing on  CNBC, to the Daily Show, Good Day LA, Geraldo, Mancow and countless radio shows across the country concerning the body language of the debaters and wrote extensive blogs on the candidates as well, I too share the sentiments of the precious little girl who went viral on youtube who was crying .

She was crying because  she was sick of  “Bronco Bama and Mitt Rom men nee. “No doubt she was sick of the hatred and ugliness she was hearing  on TV or on the radio, or perhaps from her  from her parents  and others when discussing their candidate.

While I honor that everyone has their own political views, I can assure you that  my intention  during my national interviews and in my blogs were  to never be political.I am not a political person or a political analyst. I just report what I observe from a body language standpoint. That is the truth coming from my own mouth. So when people have commented that I am partisan they are wrong as I support no party and have no agenda.

Even though I repeatedly stated this, several  refused to accept that and  subsequently spewed forth their own political beliefs via their  comments. Many went on a diatribe and leveled personal attacks which were uncalled for.

What was most shocking to me was that the ones who made the most TOXIC comments  and leveled the most vitriol were acquaintances whom I barely knew who  came out of  the woodwork.  One  such commenter was so hateful and vitriolic that my fans on my facebook page turned against her in my defense.  Apparently this  woman turned out to  be someone whom I hadn’t spoken to since I was 8 years old in the 3rd grade and whom I  only remembered  as a frizzy haired child with a strange looking  mole on her face who liked to color.

While  she was certainly free to express her opinions, when she decided  to make personal attacks  on me , especially  after I  repeatedly told  this obviously not very bright woman based on the  illogical thought patterns she expressed  and her refusal to accept that my site was not a political site.  She continued to make  personal attacks  until I told her that she was no longer welcome and blocked her from Facebook.

Next, a highly Toxic woman whom I  barely knew or  spoke to in high school but  whom I met decades later as a result of my high school reunion,  took  it  upon herself to defend  the  now grown up frizzy haired girl who was in my  3rd grade class .These two  were obviously friends who shared the same political beliefs. When I tried to once again reassure the Toxic  woman whom I was reaquainted with as a result of my high school reunion that my blogs and television and radio appearances were my observations about the candidate’s body language , she too  began to unload personal attacks until I blocked her from my Facebook account as well.

She even went to far as telling me that she, and the now grown up frizzy haired girl with whom I hadn’t spoken to since 3rd  grade, as well as a third woman- a former high school jock, (whom I  hadn’t spoken to since high school) all discussed me and came ot the conclusion that  thought that “all my fame went to my head”  and that I have turned into  a  vapid “talking head” on television.   With comments like that , it is obvious  this  Mean Girl is still mentally stuck in high school mode.

But what she intended  as  a mean cut was a actually a compliment  to me  as I am indeed  officially on the  media list as  a talking head and I  must say that I am proud of it. I should also share with you that this  Toxic woman  who made this comment  is the same woman who contacted me and  hit me up for advice about doing a television show  as she wanted to appear on camera.

Finally, a fourth woman with whom I had not spoken to since 7th grade gym class whom I only remember as having an unusually  deep hoarse voice  for  a 12 year old and who had  a very bad complexion at the time,  spewed forth her  own vitriol and made personal attacks as she chastised me for briefly  mentioning the above incident in a previous blog.

As I saw it, four  ugly  “Mean Girls’ – one from grade school,  one from junior high school, and  the  two  from high school, now  grew up and clearly  became  ugly  “Mean Women” in my view.

I certainly  am not the only one who has experienced this type of  Toxicity. There are a lot of people who turned into “Mean Women” and “Mean Men”  who   personally  attacked others they knew,  simply because they thought differently. There was no more “agreeing to disagree”  and still  maintaining  a sense of respect and dignity towards one another.

The vitriol was not only spewed  towards  remote insignificant acquaintances from the past as in my case, but  rather  with long time friends, work colleagues,  family members, and even spouses.

 

Many  saw other’s choices for a candidate as a reflection of their beliefs and personal issues. Tom, an Obama loving  gay man refused to ever speak to his  Romney supporting brother  Mike, (who  by the way was the only one  in his family who supported Tom  when he came out as being gay).  Tom said he could never look at anyone, including his own brother  who didn’t  support gay marriage like Obama did.

Another man, Ed  who was in ill health and supported Obama because of his Obamacare,  looked at his Romney supporting former best friend as a traitor who didn’t care about his friend’s heath.They haven’t spoken in months and  both never plan to speak again.

And  Jane, woman who  once had a daughter out of wedlock who’s daughter  grew up to become an attorney , will never speak to Lisa,  the Obama supporting  Godmother to her  lawyer daughter,  because Jane  is understandably,  vehemently opposed to abortion.

So when I was listened to a show on  NPR  (KPPC affiliate) discussing how once close  relationships have been destroyed over this election I listened carefully.The show told how families became divided over this election, refusing to speak to one another. One father kicked his son out of the house for not voting for Romney. One man who was interviewed on the show said that while his brother in law can come over he cannot partake and eat his barbecued cooking.

The NPR Affiliate in LA  also had another  show  about how Facebook friends  unfriended  one another due to political beliefs . They even   did a poll on it  where they found that people were indeed unfriended  others due to their political views and vice versa.

As I listened to the radio show detailing how specific relationships were so easily  tossed aside,  I thought that perhaps  these differences of opinions among so called friends may be an excuse to hang a hat on some true underlying negative feelings about the person.

Perhaps the man who wouldn’t  allow his brother in law to eat his barbecued  meat really never liked him in the first place. Perhaps the father who  kicked his  twenty something son out of the house, finally found an excuse to use  to stop his freeloading.

Maybe it was the tone of the debates  themselves which brought out people’s vitriol towards one another. How can we forget watching   the second debate where  the two candidates physically looked as though they were in a boxing ring as they circled one another in a threatening looking manner.

Perhaps it was the ugly campaign  ads  with personal attacks which added fuel to the fire  and  leaked  into our personal relationships with one another. Perhaps it was the last ditch efforts we all saw where PR scavengers like Gloria Alred  and Donald Trump were trying to dig up some nastiness and personal dirt  on the candidates, which turned out to be a dud in both cases.

Well now that the debates and campaigning  have ended, we need to heal.  We  not  only need to heal from the ugly words that infected our eyes and ears throughout this campaign.

We also  need to forgive and let go and make attempts to rekindle those once special relationships  we have  suddenly cast off.  Politics is not worth coming  between people who  once  loved and cared deeply  about one another . We need to so what we did before the election when our friends and relatives didn’t agree with us and that is to simply  “agree to disagree” and not ” throw the baby out with the bath water” or “cut off our nose to spite our face” as the expressions go.

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Dina Lohan Flirts With Dr. Phil Using Manipulative Body Language
September 18, 2012

My hat goes off to Dr. Phil as you can  see what an amazing professional he is in terms of how he handled Dina Lohan during her interviwe on his show. He didn’t let her get away with anything. He set boundaries and he didn’t put up with her

trying to control the situation and acting like a big shot in the TV world . As she asked if the cameramen were rolling and used TV lingo she did so in an attempt to put herself on even footing with Dr. Phil. But it  backfired as Dr. Phil called her on it.  he let her know that it was not his first day in television and that he would handle all the television technical issues.

When she realized that she couldn’t gain control or the upper hand or manipulate Dr. Phil or the interview she resorted to flirting as she raised her shoulder in a coquettish manner and smiled in order to try and manipulate Dr. Phil with her sexuality. But that clearly did not work.

Then Dr. Phil gets serious and asks if she went to college. WE see her in defensive mode body language wise as she covers herself up and holds on to her elbows as if to brace herself for the upcoming  hard hitting questions.

She says she went to NYU and was a dance major as she flits with her hair. She obviously didn’t finish college and her body language reflects charged emotion not he topic. As she was asked about Michael, her ex  she tries to take control by telling the camera men to cut.

She is clueless that this is Dr. Phil’s show and he is the one to say cut not her. He is is control not her.

When the camera crow goes about their business and continues filing she messes us the interview by turing away and holding up her hand indicating that she wants them  to cut out what she said.

Dr. Phil is not having any of this nonsense and must have shot her a serious no nonsense look as she immediately retreats and becomes small as she hunches over and puts her hand on her face as she gives a frustrated look of  upset resignation that she has lost control and it can’t be her way.

Dr. Phil is compassionate as he tells her to take a breath as she complies. Then he resumes questioning about Michael . Instead of answering she says to dr. Phil- I feel were’ on a date.” How inappropriate yet how revealing. She once again resorts to trying to get her way and control over the situation through flirtation.”

Dr. Phil asks her a simple question  about Michael and she turns away and says that;s a loaded question which surprises Dr. Phil as it was a simple question.

Now look what happens when Dr. Phil asks her about when the abuse by Michael started . She inappropriately laughs and turns away crinkles her nose and raises her shoulder  and in a flirtatious manner laughs and says ” On my honeymoon.”This was inappropriate body language for the question which was asked. It was her way of  not wanting to go down that line of questioning.

Dr. Phil probes , What happened on your honeymoon?” She inappropriately turns away  and acts coquettish as she says “He threw a bible at my head” said as if she was asking a question. Her voice also  died off at the end of the statement so you could barely hear her. She inappropriately laughed as she said this. Based on her tone and body language tells I wonder if that is true. I wonder if Michael really thew a bible at her head on their honeymoon. To me it seemed like there were many signals of deception.

Then she repeats herself and says that she can’t believe she is saying this on camera as she looks down.Dr. Phil finds this unbelievable as he repeats what she says “On your honeymoon he throws a bible at your head.”  She should shrugs, looks down and acts flirtatious. When he asks if she thought it wouldn’t happen again, she shakes her head no when answering in the affirmative, looks down and shrugs her shoulders once again which to me may indicate deception on her part.

Dr. Phil asks her about the lowest time in her relation with Michael. Once again in high dramatic fashion she turns away from the camera and says :” Can we stop”, one again trying to manipulate and gain control over the interview. But of course there is no stopping.

She fakes  crying as  she immediately continues on devoid of upset and crying. At this point she carries a prop- a kleenex.

She leaks out yet anther flirtatious signal reminiscent of Marilyn Monroe as she says “you just have to know when to get out” in reference to Michael’s abuse. Her body language does not match the content of what was said. She then smiles, a coquettish smile as she shrugs her shoulders.

Then as Dr. Phil proceeds to ask her anther question pertaining to Michael and his alleged abuse, we she her wiping away a non tear and wiping her non tears from one eye. people crying with real tears from both eyes, not one eye. Then she lets out two fake sniffs as Dr. Phil asks her to speak about the time Michael showed up at her home. her recovery time was too quick, devoid of emotion as she begins to speak.

She then goes into flirting mode agin as she raises her shoulder , gives Dr. Phil direct eye contact as she smiles and in a breathy tone says “Do I really have to talk about that?” Dr. Phil calmly replies ” Do you?”

She then smiles and points at him and says “You’re good” in yet another attempt to gain control over the interview and manipulate.

She then laughs and turns into little girl mode as she says Can I go home now?

Dr. Phil was having none of it. he called her on everything from her denial about Lindsay to what she was on the show. He finally had enough of her not being genuine as he dismissed her and ended the interview.

Watching this over 50 year old flirting to get her way and sticking poses was pathetic and sad . Her denial about Lindsay  was reminiscent of how Lindsay  like Dina is  unable to  take responsibility for her actions and blame it on others.

After watching this very disturbing interview  it is so clear why  Lindsay is the way she is and why she does not have a chance in life unless she unplugs from her  mom manager’s influence and control and gets into some serious therapy to deal with the negative effects her mom has had on her.

Both of her parents leave a lot to be desired. We have all heard from mouthy Michael throughout the years as he has trashed Dina in the press . After watching this interview with Dr. Phil, apparently there may be a lot of truth to what Michael has said about Dina.

You could really see the competive nature she has with Lindsay

Katherine Jackson’s Monotone and Body Language As She Reads Speech And Rebbe, Jermain’s and Janet’s Body Language Says It All
July 26, 2012

Perhaps one of the most disturbing videos I have seen involve the one just released where  Jackson family matriarch Katherine Jackson assuring everyone that she is OK.

But based on her body language and tone of voice and the content of what she read, in my view she doesn’t seem OK. She seems robotic and stiff and disconnected in what she is saying. The first clue that something is amiss is that she is reading a written script. If a person is OK, they look into a camera, sans script and speak from their heart. This is not what has happened here.

Her monotone unemotional voice was disconcerting. Here she is talking about emotional issues where her guardianship has been revoked and she speaks in  a monotone devoid of emotion. There is no hint of sadness or despair or anger.

The fact that she is also defensive and says that it is crazy for people to think she was abducted and that her family would never do that speaks volumes. Blaming the public for thinking she was abducted and then using the term “crazy” in my view says there is more than meets the eye.

JERMAIN

Jermain’s body language is downright disturbing if not scary as he looms over his mother in his sunglasses and tight fitting tee, displaying his man boobs . His facial expresions  appears cocky and  arrogant as he leans to the side and then

hovers over his mother, as we see int he photo above as  he appears to look  her script .

JANET


Janet who was considered by man as the most normal one in the family,  just lost a lot of points in my eyes.

She is the one who was seen on the surveillance video trying to grab Paris’ cellphone and allegedly calling her a spoiled bitch. Throughout her mother’s presser, Janet kept a stoic facial expression.  She alsolooked over her mother’s shoulder as we can see above as her mother read the script  provided t her.

Janet did not look like the charismatic happy Janet we have always seen, but rather a somber and angry Janet.

Now Prince’s tweet reveals that Janet may have been  behind the lack of contact between Katherine and her Grandkids as she writes “Don’t let them pls.” in response to Prince’s plea “This is enough so I am texting you for the simple fact that WE DEMAND TO SPEAK TO MY GRANDMA NOW!!!”

REBBE

Rebbe appeared was cocky and had an inappropriate smirk on her face  and nodded when the mother named her assistant by name “Ms. Smith”  saying that her assistant was calling the household to check up on the kids.  In a non verbal way, it was a though Rebbe was saying That’s right” See we were in contact with the grandkids all along”. It was as though she was covering her tracts and may have possibly even written those words for her other to say. She seemed too proud of herself as these words were read.

But it is ridiculous to have any assistant calling the household to check up on the kids. The kids neded to speak to their grandmother directly during those ten days.

Katherine Jackson seemed very passive during her speech. It was reminiscent of someone with Stockholm Syndrome, who is kidnapped and then sides with the enemy.

There was even a marketing director from the Tuscon Spa in the room to prove that Katherine was at the Spa on  a vacation. It was obviously set up to eliminate any suspicions that there was foul play and that she was kidnapped.

SIBLINGS ALLEGED GREED PUTS KATHERINE AT RISK

Katherine is between a rock and a hard place. She does not want to incriminate her own kids as they can get into a lot of trouble for elder abuse in causing her emotional distress and for kidnapping her and taking her across state lines. Then she also loves her grandkids dearly. So she said that it was only because of lie that she lost the guardianship.

Now brother and sister are pitted against one another and many believe it was masterminded by Randy who was not conveniently  present as Katherine read her written script. Randy is the brother with whom Michael was said to be at odds with the most. Perhaps there was more jealousy and competition due to their closeness of age and due to Michael’s enormous success.

So now it is Janet, Rebbe, Randy, and Jermain versus Jackie, Marlon, and Tito. They have put their mother in the middle of this mess and now she is the victim of all of the fallout as  she has  now lost guardianship of her grandkids.

Latoya usually he most outspoken of all the Jackson’s was conveniently or purposely  not present as not to get herself mixed up into the mire of this Toxic Family.

In her private moments when she is alone without the influence of Rebbe, Randy and Janet, there is no doubt that she will suffer the emotional pain of not seeing her grandkids on a daily basis and watching them continue to grow. This may be a death knell for her.

Now we can finally understand why Michael wanted to distance himself from all of these Toxic People.

Why did all of this take place? There is  only one reason- money. Four of the siblings wanted more money to be given to Katherine so that she could  then dole it out to them. Their plot to turn their mother against the estate backfired as Katherine  so she could receive more money in her lifetime has now lost the  $840,000 in annual child support but has also lost her grandkids .

Body Language of Sadistic Trump Son’s Glee After Murdering Innocent Animals and Lame PR Spin
March 15, 2012

After seeing  the photos of  Donald  Trump sons Eric and Donny’s  facial expression of glee as they posed in front of dead animas  they murdered as Eric  carried a beautiful dead leopard who’s life he snuffed out, I was sickend. The they show happiness spoke volumes. Real men in touch with their masculinity  dont delight when they kill . Men who are trying to pose as macho men  who are not  really masculine do this becuase they are so weak as men.

Their father Donald Trump  divides people into 2  categories – winners and losers.While Donald is a winner in my view his animal murdering sons are losers. And PLEASE do not tell me they killed these animals to feed a village in Africa, That is insulting! The press release on this is a joke. The public is not dumb! They get it!  They killed these animals to show they were macho and manly men. They get that these are two weak nurds with no

TO REAAD MORE CLICK LINK BELOW:

http://drlillianglass.com/body-language-blog/2012/03/15/donald-trump-sons-sadistic-body-language-as-they-pose-with-innocent-animals-they-killed/

http://drlillianglass.com/body-language-blog/2012/03/15/donald-trump-sons-sadistic-body-language-as-they-pose-with-innocent-animals-they-killed/

Lindsay Lohan’s New Image and Body Language Needs Vocal Rehab
March 3, 2012

Lindsay Lohan recently  looked  a lot more mature than the fresh faced girl next

door look we once knew as she appeared on all the talks shows on NBC to promote her SNL gig to give her career a  well needed boost.

Looking more and more like her stage mom Dina Lohan , she looked pretty with her  desperately needed newly veneered teeth. She also eliminated of the lip trout that  made her face look out of proportion in relation to to her facial features.

Despite her new classical facial appearance and  curvaceous figure the one thing she still really needs to work on is her voice. As someone who did voice and speech and body language coaching with A list actors for various movie roles  over the years, I know what I am talking about here.

VOICE THERAPY NOW!

She sounded hoarse, gravely and harsh. I think that as she ventures into acting and gets her life and acting career back on track it would be in her best interest to also get some desperately needed vocal therapy.

Her voice sounds  so bad because of the vocal abuse from what often happens when one abuses drugs and  or alcohol . This is what people sound like who abuse themselves for a long period of time. Vocal muscles  and tissues get taxed and there can be damage to them. The wasy she sounds will clearly limit her roles because she has a harsh limited note range. As a performer you need a wide range.

To Read More Click Link Below

http://drlillianglass.com/body-language-blog/2012/03/03/lindsay-lohan’s-new-body-language-and-image-desperately-needs-voice-work-as-well/

Toxic Men: School Shooter in Ohio Caused By ” Silent But Deadly Erupting Volcano” Who Was Bullied
February 28, 2012

As the author of the best selling book Toxic Peoplehttp://www.amazon.com/Toxic-People-Ways-Dealing-Miserable/dp/0312152329/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1330452498&sr=1-1  

as well as my latest book Toxic Men http://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Men-Ways-Identify-Miserable/dp/144050007X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1330452562&sr=1-1which has just been released in paperback, I came up with the category of Silent But Deadly Erupting Volcano. This category says it all when it comes to 17 year old T.J. Lane who shot and killed fellow classmates and injured others in his Ohio high school.

Many of his fellow students said  he was “quiet”. Others  said he was sweet. One student who played basketball with him after school several years ago said he seemed happy when he was around him and that he was shocked because he wasn’t a violent kid. Another student at his church group said that he was  “a nice boy.”

But others said had a “simmering temper”. And  my view is that “simmering temper’ was fueled by inner rage that was not verbally expressed.

To read more click link below 

http://drlillianglass.com/body-language-blog/2012/02/28/toxic-people-ohio-school-shooter-silent-but-deadly-erupting-volcano/

Dr. Lillian Glass Annual Tp ten Favorite Gifts And Number One Body Language Gift
December 24, 2011

Dr. Lillian Glass Annual Top Ten Favorite Gift Ideas for 2011 Including the BEST Body Language Gift

Each year around this holiday time I like to share my thoughts on what special gifts to get yourself, your  family, friends,  loved ones and even those whom you may not know personally ,who  could benefit from your love and kindness.  You can give or get these gifts all year round as well.

TO READ MORE CLICK LINK BELOW:

http://drlillianglass.com/body-language-blog/2011/12/21/dr-lillian-glass-annual-top-ten-favorite-gift-ideas-for-christmas-and-all-year-round-2011-including-the-best-body-language-gift/

Toxic Man Omar Sharif’s Body Language As He Abuses A Woman in Public
October 28, 2011

 

There is nothing that sickened me more than seeing , Omar Sharif of Dr. Zhivago fame  a one time heartthrob to many women back in the day, physcially abuse a woman in public. It was shocking and appalling.  He severely slapped  a woman simply because she wanted to have her photo taken with him.Apparently   she was overzealous and did not wait her turn to be photographed. nued to  . He let her know she did wrong in his eyes, not only by his physical slap but by his verbal slap as he continued to berate her .

 What was more appalling was looking at the video frame by frame and seeing how he gets enraged, slaps her, goes off on her, feels guilty about it, tries and  to make nice, Now  he  becomes   angry at her for making him angry. Below  is a frame by frame analysis of  whathe did to her.

To read more click link below

http://http://drlillianglass.com/body-language-blog/2011/10/28/omar-sharif%e2%80%99s-toxic-body-language-typical-of-an-abusive-man/

Toxic Teacher Who Had Children” Oink” At Messy Student Should Never Be Allowed to Teach Anywhere
April 15, 2011

What happens to us in our childhood has a lasting effect on who we grow up to be and what happens to us in life. As a communications and  body language expert I cannot begin to  tell you  just how many private clients I have seen in my life who had public speaking problems and who were terrified of speaking in front of others- no matter how small the group, just  because some insensitive  ignorant teacher humiliated them in front of the room.

I have seen grown men- CEO’s of major corporations break down and cry in my offices knowing they had to present the annual report for their company. I have seen beautiful women shake with fear and dread also cry when they had to go on an interview or speak at a presentation.

Consistently  in all of these cases it appeared to  stem back to a teacher who humiliated then in front of the classroom. They suffered a lifetime of  emotional  trauma as a result.

I also know of  someone   who hates anything to do with athletics every since  they  were traumatized by their  first grade  gym teacher who screamed at then for not knowing their right from their left  when they marched in the opposite direction during a class exercise.  As it turned out the boy who was dyslexic .Not only was his academic progress challenged, so was his athletic progress because of this ignorant  teacher.

So when I read that yet another ignorant and insensitive  teacher was guilty of causing psychic trauma to yet another student, I was livid.

This kindergarten  teacher Debbie Hayes at Bowers Elementary  was nothing more than a paid BULLY in my view. She had the audacity to tell the other students to encircle  their classmate and call him a pig while making pig noises and oinking at the boy simply because he had a messy desk. This BULLY needs to be fired and never be allowed to teach again.

Apparently Debbie Hayes, is a veteran educator who should have known better as she had taught kindergarten for 38 years in Roane County. Who knows what other harm  this abusive bully in my view  did to other children in her close to four decades as an educator.  In fact Dr.Toni McGriff the director of Roane County Schools, called the March 16 incident “simply unbelievable”

In her reprimand letter, McGriff told Hayes she was “appalled with the actions in this situation.””It’s a black eye on the profession,”. “It’s a black eye on our schools.”

Apparently another educator walked into Debbie Hayes’ classroom March 16 and saw kindergartners encircling their crying classmate.”The students in the circle were ‘oinking’ and making pig sounds at the little boy,”

A teacher  who witnessed the incident told Principal Candace Lett that afternoon. Hayes and Lett met the next day in McGriff’s office to discuss the episode.

During that meeting, Hayes said she was “tired of the student’s messiness and had repeatedly warned the child to be neater , However, the students in the classroom told authorities teacher   Debbie Hayes told them to encircle the child “and call him a pig and make pig noises,” according to the reprimand.

Hayes only received  one received a  one-day suspension from her job.

This is horrible, in my view. Hayes needs to be  fired for causing  abuse  and potential of lifetime psychic  trauma to this boy. She also needs to be sued by the boys parents and she needs to pay all of his psychologists bills that he will no doubt need to recover from this abusive trauma, if he ever recovers.  This  incident may have long lasting traumatic effects on this child for the rest of his life.

In essence this bully of a teacher taught the other children how to bully and she needs to be held accountable.

All this ignorant creature teacher needed to do was send a letter home with the boy or have a parent child conference or find out why he was being so messy. Oftentimes messiness is a sign of creativity. It may also be that this is how he lives at home in a messy environment. So he many have thought it was normal to be messy.

Apparently Hayes was  forced to  apologize to the students. Personally, I don’t think her apology is enough. It means nothing in the scheme of things. She traumatized this poor child to the point that he was crying. She needs a taste of her own medicine and needs to be ostracized from her school community and lose her pension that she worked so hard to obtain all of these years. She needs to see how she would like it if she was cut off  from ever working at a teaching job again.

She is the real pig in this situation.  The real messy person who messed with a  child’s psyche , That is worse than any messy desk or messy room.

Apparently the  school principal offered to transfer the abused  child  to another classroom, but the mother declined. I think the mother  did the right thing.  In the end , the teacher was made to look like the fool and the boy may come out to be  a hero. I also think that every child who called him a pig and surrounded him needs to be made to personally apologize to him, look him in the eye, say I am sorry and shake his hand. This way the boy will feel better and the other kids will now see him in a different light- someone they can respect.

I do hope that the parents of the boy don’t minimize this egregious act. They need to understand that this incident can have lasting repercussions. It is bad enough when one student bullies another but when the whole class is made to bully a child by a disturbed teacher it is a different matter. They need to lawyer up and sue the teacher, the school board and the school system in their community because there is no doubt that they  will need the money to pay for this boy’s psychological care int he future.

The boy cried which showed that he was upset and traumatized. Those tears run deep and can course through his psyche for a lifetime. Shame on this Bully Debbie Hayes who must never be allowed  teach again. Like a child abuser or child molester, she must never be allowed to  come in contact with children  again in my view. www.drlillianglass.com

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